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Workplace Violence

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    Workplace Violence

    Do anyone miss the old days of being a permie where you could physically intimidate and indeed commit small acts of violence on co-workers (without worrying about liability insurance).

    What does on in the Sainsbury's carpark stays in the Sainsbury's carpark.

    The only acts of agression I get these days are big chested female project managers (sometimes lesbianic) sticking their assets in my face and putting the thumbscrews on.

    I cross myself and say 3 hail marys.

    #2
    Originally posted by tinopener View Post
    The only acts of agression I get these days are big chested female project managers (sometimes lesbianic) sticking their assets in my face and putting the thumbscrews on.
    Point them at this thread - I'm sure they'll happily grab you by the nuts and throw you out the door.

    Comment


      #3
      I miss not being able to pick on apprentices. I was an electrical apprentice in a large foundry and had it all, greased up, taped up and left in the food waste bin, I even got made redundant whilst hanging from an overhead crane with a broom across my shoulders. The whole experience made me the man I am.

      You can't even say boo to them nowadays.
      'CUK forum personality of 2011 - Winner - Yes really!!!!

      Comment


        #4
        Someone told me they'd seen a co-contractor lose it, crack the PM over the head with his laptop and storm off the project.

        And that was the last anyone heard of him until he rang that same PM requesting a reference.

        Comment


          #5
          I used to work in a place that had a useful booklet pinned on the notice board with the title:
          Dealing with Violence and Aggression in the Workplace
          It was greatly improved when my mate added the word 'Drug' at the start of the title, and they kept it up for years like that to freak out the Area Manager when he dropped in unannounced.

          Comment


            #6
            In my mainframe days I'd gone into work one evening to fix a job and heard screaming and shouting from the gents. The lead operator had a new trainee on his shift and had chased him down to the loo demanding sex.

            (He didn't want sex, but the trainee didn't know that at the time).
            Last edited by I just need to test it; 31 July 2014, 09:23.

            Comment


              #7
              Originally posted by I just need to test it View Post
              Someone told me they'd seen a co-contractor lose it, crack the PM over the head with his laptop and storm off the project.

              And that was the last anyone heard of him until he rang that same PM requesting a reference.
              If I'd been the pm I certainly couldn't deny the guy was decisive and eager to get cracking, and had made a significant impact
              Last edited by OwlHoot; 31 July 2014, 09:40.
              Work in the public sector? Read the IR35 FAQ here

              Comment


                #8
                Originally posted by tinopener View Post
                Do anyone miss the old days of being a permie where you could physically intimidate and indeed commit small acts of violence on co-workers (without worrying about liability insurance).

                What does on in the Sainsbury's carpark stays in the Sainsbury's carpark.

                The only acts of agression I get these days are big chested female project managers (sometimes lesbianic) sticking their assets in my face and putting the thumbscrews on.

                I cross myself and say 3 hail marys.
                Great, now I have yet another fantasy I have to sheepishly ask SY02 to perform
                Knock first as I might be balancing my chakras.

                Comment


                  #9
                  Originally posted by suityou01 View Post
                  Great, now I have yet another fantasy I have to sheepishly ask SY02 to perform
                  Don't they do that to you in real life?
                  Work in the public sector? Read the IR35 FAQ here

                  Comment


                    #10
                    Originally posted by OwlHoot View Post
                    Don't they do that to you in real life?
                    There was a PM yonks ago who had geeeeeeeeeeyyyyyyyyyyyyyeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeenormous assets. And she wasn't a bad looking bird. Built for comfort, not for speed.

                    But she also had a bad back, and I think this might have been so severe that it was affecting her waterworks.

                    Her chair stunk of wee.
                    Knock first as I might be balancing my chakras.

                    Comment

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