Hands free tulips

[SpontaneousOrder]

Ok.. after about a decade or so, I give up.

Are hands free tulips real? Or just a tv thing? Like, on tv you see people taking dump while reading a book, etc.

My other half laughs her arse off - but I think maybe she's just see tv reality and being a girl, doesn't get it.


If you're hands free, how do you not dangle against the porcelain? Do you adopt a certain stance? I feel like the victim of a several decades long TV conspiracy to make me think i'm doing it wrong.

[FatLazyContractor]

[RetSet]

Befriend a drag artist(e) and ask him/ her to explain 'The Tuck'.

That might help.

Otherwise you're probably wasted in IT, and ought to move into 'adult entertainment'...

BTW, your OP is TMI