Things may be bad - but at least I don't have to listen to Chris Eubank

[BrilloPad]

Chris Eubank fails in bid to talk suicidal man out of jumping to death over M23 | Daily Mail Online

I thought usually Eubank tried to run over builders on the M23 rather than talk them to death?

[GlenW]

One of the most technically gifted boxers I've ever watched, but a complete knobhead.

[BrilloPad]

One of the most technically gifted boxers I've ever watched, but a complete knobhead.

True true. Though I felt the Watson fight was too far. It was horrible to watch - I was frozen in fear.

I did like Caroline Hook(Aherne?) asking Eubank if he enjoyed licking Watson in the ring...

[MicrosoftBob]

I remember Eubank on TOTP introducing Suggs cover of Cecilia, someone had a fine sense of irony that day

[Gumbo Robot]

I like him.

He's a great British eccentric.

[SimonMac]

He didn't fail, he tried to help which is more than most would (see my previous thread on the subject)

[BrilloPad]

He didn't fail, he tried to help which is more than most would (see my previous thread on the subject)

I never said he failed. But if I was suicidal the last person I would want to talk to is a total imbecile.

The road to hell is paved with good intentions.

[OwlHoot]

It's a shame and all that, but why did the Mail have to make such a big song and dance about the fact that the guy was 17 stone?

Also, what was a former fishermen from Mauritius doing living in the UK, miles from the sea? No wonder he was unemployed.

[BrilloPad]

It's a shame and all that, but why did the Mail have to make such a big song and dance about the fact that the guy was 17 stone?

Also, what was a former fishermen from Mauritius doing living in the UK, miles from the sea? No wonder he was unemployed.

A vacationing English businessman standing on the pier of a quaint coastal fishing village in southern Mauritius watched as a small boat with just one young Mauritian fisherman pulled into the dock. Inside the small boat were several large yellowfin tuna. Enjoying the warmth of the early afternoon sun, the English complimented the Mexican on the quality of his fish.

"How long did it take you to catch them?" the English casually asked.

"Oh, a few hours," the Mauritian fisherman replied.

"Why don't you stay out longer and catch more fish?" the English businessman then asked.

The Mexican warmly replied, "With this I have more than enough to meet my family's needs."

The businessman then became serious, "But what do you do with the rest of your time?"

Responding with a smile, the Mauritian fisherman answered, "I sleep late, play with my children, watch ball games, and take siesta with my wife. Sometimes in the evenings I take a stroll into the village to see my friends, play the guitar, sing a few songs..."

The English businessman impatiently interrupted, "Look, I have an MBA from LSE, and I can help you to be more profitable.
You can start by fishing several hours longer every day. You can then sell the extra fish you catch. With the extra money, you can buy a bigger boat.
With the additional income that larger boat will bring, before long you can buy a second boat, then a third one, and so on, until you have an entire fleet of fishing boats."

Proud of his own sharp thinking, he excitedly elaborated a grand scheme which could bring even bigger profits, "Then, instead of selling your catch to a middleman you'll be able to sell your fish directly to the processor, or even open your own cannery. Eventually, you could control the product, processing and distribution.
You could leave this tiny coastal village and move to Mauritius City, or possibly even Gatwick, where you could even further expand your enterprise."

Having never thought of such things, the Mauritian fisherman asked, "But how long will all this take?"

After a rapid mental calculation, the English MBA pronounced, "Probably about 15-20 years, maybe less if you work really hard."

"And then what, señor?" asked the fisherman.

"Why, that's the best part!" answered the businessman with a laugh. "When the time is right, you would sell your company stock to the public and become very rich. You would make millions."

"Millions? Really? What would I do with it all?" asked the young fisherman in disbelief.

The businessman boasted, "Then you could happily retire with all the money you've made. You could move to a quaint coastal fishing village where you could sleep late, play with your grandchildren, watch ball games, and take siesta with your wife. You could stroll to the village in the evenings where you could play the guitar and sing with your friends all you want."

[SimonMac]

It's a shame and all that, but why did the Mail have to make such a big song and dance about the fact that the guy was 17 stone?

Also, what was a former fishermen from Mauritius doing living in the UK, miles from the sea? No wonder he was unemployed.

I think his weight would have been a factor in the ability of the copper(s) to keep hold of him