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sasguru
24th April 2016, 20:06
I've got some lint and a 10 euro note left over from holiday. What a loser I am.

FatLazyContractor
24th April 2016, 20:10
4 credit cards
2 debit cards
£500 in cash
Around 200 Euros
A few loyalty cards from the high class hooker establishments :smokin
3 condoms (usually for a night's usage) :smokin
Driving License
Copy of Passport

FatLazyContractor
24th April 2016, 20:10
I've got some lint and a 10 euro note left over from holiday. What a loser I am.

We all agree.

sasguru
24th April 2016, 20:11
4 credit cards
2 debit cards
£500 in cash
Around 200 Euros
A few loyalty cards from the high class hooker establishments :smokin
3 condoms (usually for a night's usage) :smokin
Driving License
Copy of Passport

You're a winner. Wish I was you

FatLazyContractor
24th April 2016, 20:12
You're a winner. Wish I was you

I don't wish you were me you :winker:.

You were, are and always will be an official :winker:, as suggested by AtW :smokin

sasguru
24th April 2016, 20:16
I don't wish you were me you :winker:.

You were, are and always will be an official :winker:, as suggested by AtW :smokin

Are you as good looking as you are charming?

greenlake
24th April 2016, 20:21
I carry protection in my wallet....

http://kevinsconcealment.com/wp-content/uploads/2015/06/KWH_01-1024x575.jpg

BrilloPad
24th April 2016, 20:21
I have the bank account details of the Ex-MrsDP. Now I just have to raid her account and the gold will be all mine.

FatLazyContractor
24th April 2016, 20:22
I have the bank account details of the Ex-MrsDP. Now I just have to raid her account and the gold will be all mine.

Is she now happily married to DP ?

sasguru
24th April 2016, 20:23
I have the bank account details of the Ex-MrsDP. Now I just have to raid her account and the gold will be all mine.

What a winner. Next !

BrilloPad
24th April 2016, 20:24
Is she now happily married to DP ?

They were happily married. But she did not clean behind the fridge. So as DP is a loyal UKIP supporter, she had to go.

mudskipper
24th April 2016, 20:25
I found a small purse in (ex)mother's drawer yesterday. At last, thinks I, something I can usefully purpose for when I am out and about on my velocipede.

The popper is broken, so purse is useless. Why, why, why would you keep a broken purse in your bedside table drawer for over a decade?

greenlake
24th April 2016, 20:32
I have the bank account details of the Ex-MrsDP. Now I just have to raid her account and the gold will be all mine.

May your dreams come true....

http://ecx.images-amazon.com/images/I/71ZZmgm6SpL._SX355_.jpg

sasguru
24th April 2016, 20:45
I found a small purse in (ex)mother's drawer yesterday. At last, thinks I, something I can usefully purpose for when I am out and about on my velocipede.

The popper is broken, so purse is useless. Why, why, why would you keep a broken purse in your bedside table drawer for over a decade?

Sentimental value ....

DimPrawn
24th April 2016, 20:53
Is she now happily married to DP ?

I've still got a picture of the now ex-mrs in my wallet, taken soon after I agreed to marry her.

http://d236bkdxj385sg.cloudfront.net/wp-content/uploads/2012/12/18-378x334.jpg

Happy days.

sasguru
24th April 2016, 20:58
I've still got a picture of the now ex-mrs in my wallet, taken soon after I agreed to marry her.

http://d236bkdxj385sg.cloudfront.net/wp-content/uploads/2012/12/18-378x334.jpg

Happy days.

We have a winner ! Next!

vetran
24th April 2016, 21:23
OLSQ


https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=QwggXWWQrbM

AtW
24th April 2016, 21:32
http://c8.alamy.com/comp/C0BY3W/wad-of-50-notes-in-wallet-london-england-uk-europe-C0BY3W.jpg

SueEllen
24th April 2016, 21:36
http://c8.alamy.com/comp/C0BY3W/wad-of-50-notes-in-wallet-london-england-uk-europe-C0BY3W.jpg

That's cos your Russian...

Mordac
24th April 2016, 21:43
I've got some lint and a 10 euro note left over from holiday. What a loser I am.

If I get nicked by the rozzers, I may have some questions to answer....:frown

AtW
24th April 2016, 21:45
That's cos your Russian...

:spel

because
you're

vetran
24th April 2016, 22:15
:spel

because
you're

no she thinks you are a damp lettuce.

AtW
24th April 2016, 23:03
no she thinks you are a damp lettuce.

She loves me really ...

:wink

greenlake
24th April 2016, 23:14
She loves me really ...

:wink

She depends on you....
http://cdn.deliberry.com/images/1974/resize/600/600/3.jpg

PurpleGorilla
25th April 2016, 07:12
I carry protection in my wallet....

http://kevinsconcealment.com/wp-content/uploads/2015/06/KWH_01-1024x575.jpg

America's solution to every problem.

The gun!

vetran
25th April 2016, 08:01
I found a small purse in (ex)mother's drawer yesterday. At last, thinks I, something I can usefully purpose for when I am out and about on my velocipede.

The popper is broken, so purse is useless. Why, why, why would you keep a broken purse in your bedside table drawer for over a decade?

the wife has kept me for 2 decades!

barrydidit
25th April 2016, 08:10
I carry around the possibility of my tenants ever being able to afford their own home. And I spend it all on beer, fags and takeaways.