OBITUARIES
Professor Alex Stalin (AtW) Chudnovsky 1973 – 2006
It is with great regret that we announce the passing of Alex Chudnovsky, a proud son of the former Soviet Union, all-round inventor of useful things, and world-class genius.
Chudnovsky was tragically killed when his extravagant trademark moustache became caught between the input rollers of his Great SKA Computation Engine -- a steam-powered behemoth that Chudnovsky had intended to contain every iota of the world’s knowledge, in a 'handy-to-find' format.
Many of his peers at the Royal Society considered Chudnovsky insane – or worse – yet he pressed ahead with this doomed venture at a huge cost to his personal wealth and his sanity.
Chudnovsky’s meteoric career began when he was used as an experimental payload on a number of test rockets at the Baikonur space centre (the use of monkeys, dogs and goats for this purpose being too controversial at the time). The young Alexi distinguished himself by calculating the orbital trajectory of his tiny capsule and recording telemetry in real-time using nothing more than a crayon and a packet of damp Rizla papers.
Later he gained even more PhDs than the legendary scholar Threadedovski at the University of Bullingrad and went on to win the Nobel Prize for Equivocation in 1987.
Finally he moved to England, taking up residence in the leafy glades of Birmingham and pursued his dreams of packaging every known fact into a box measuring no bigger than 4’ x 7’.
Alex Chudnovsky was unmarried (but was very close to his sister - allegedly).
Professor Alex Stalin (AtW) Chudnovsky 1973 – 2006
It is with great regret that we announce the passing of Alex Chudnovsky, a proud son of the former Soviet Union, all-round inventor of useful things, and world-class genius.
Chudnovsky was tragically killed when his extravagant trademark moustache became caught between the input rollers of his Great SKA Computation Engine -- a steam-powered behemoth that Chudnovsky had intended to contain every iota of the world’s knowledge, in a 'handy-to-find' format.
Many of his peers at the Royal Society considered Chudnovsky insane – or worse – yet he pressed ahead with this doomed venture at a huge cost to his personal wealth and his sanity.
Chudnovsky’s meteoric career began when he was used as an experimental payload on a number of test rockets at the Baikonur space centre (the use of monkeys, dogs and goats for this purpose being too controversial at the time). The young Alexi distinguished himself by calculating the orbital trajectory of his tiny capsule and recording telemetry in real-time using nothing more than a crayon and a packet of damp Rizla papers.
Later he gained even more PhDs than the legendary scholar Threadedovski at the University of Bullingrad and went on to win the Nobel Prize for Equivocation in 1987.
Finally he moved to England, taking up residence in the leafy glades of Birmingham and pursued his dreams of packaging every known fact into a box measuring no bigger than 4’ x 7’.
Alex Chudnovsky was unmarried (but was very close to his sister - allegedly).
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