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I scared a lady...

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    I scared a lady...

    I was happily minding my own business on the throne, when suddenly the door opens.

    A lady I had not yet met turned on her heels distraught clearly not knowing where to look.

    It turned out that the lock was loose, and I did not forget to lock the door as I initially thought.

    Has anyone got a better ice-breaker to a new colleague?

    #2
    Hahah, oh man! I was the lady in the reverse of this scenario a few years back at an old client co. I'd totally forgotten about it until I read this - it was a big old listed building where some kind of small room had been converted into a huge bathroom. For whatever reason she'd failed to lock the door and I do have a tendency to barge around a bit, so that along with the heavy old door meant I was well and truly in the room before I'd realised.

    I did the mature thing and spent the rest of my contract avoiding her.
    Last edited by vwdan; 17 October 2018, 13:37.

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      #3
      Originally posted by Wilmslow View Post
      I was happily minding my own business on the throne, when suddenly the door opens.

      A lady I had not yet met turned on her heels distraught clearly not knowing where to look.

      It turned out that the lock was loose, and I did not forget to lock the door as I initially thought.

      Has anyone got a better ice-breaker to a new colleague?
      Are you sure that she was scared? Could be her screaming was in fact hysterical laughter?

      Comment


        #4
        Originally posted by Wilmslow View Post
        A lady I had not yet met turned on her heels distraught clearly not knowing where to look.
        Where as when I get caught knocking the top off in the bogs by a fair maiden she can't take her eyes off it.

        I guess, in some respects, size does matter.
        'CUK forum personality of 2011 - Winner - Yes really!!!!

        Comment


          #5
          Originally posted by northernladuk View Post
          Where as when I get caught knocking the top off in the bogs by a fair maiden she can't take her eyes off it.

          I guess, in some respects, size does matter.
          You're confusing "morbid curiosity" with something more positive, I'm afraid, NLUK.

          "Wow, I bet he's great at building models with miniature precision like that. Must have good contact lenses, too"

          Comment


            #6
            Originally posted by vwdan View Post
            You're confusing "morbid curiosity" with something more positive, I'm afraid, NLUK.

            "Wow, that big prick has a really small penis"
            Ftfy.
            Old Greg - In search of acceptance since Mar 2007. Hoping each leap will be his last.

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              #7
              Originally posted by woohoo View Post
              Are you sure that she was scared? Could be her screaming was in fact hysterical laughter?
              Probably went off for a magnifying glass.
              Down with racism. Long live miscegenation!

              Comment


                #8
                Originally posted by vwdan View Post

                I did the mature thing and spent the rest of my contract avoiding her.
                cos she was fugly?
                See You Next Tuesday

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                  #9
                  The bogs on platform 4 at Reading station have got strange signs. Rather than the man standing with legs together as tradition, they've gone for a more realistic stance, with his legs slightly apart. At a glance, when you're in a hurry and not wearing your glasses, the shape is rather similar to the angled skirt shape one associates with the women's toilet.

                  I'd made it all the way to the cubicle before I realised I'd walked past two men at the urinals.

                  I have to confess that on opening the door, I did think "These toilets stink!" Why is it that men's toilets smell so much worse than women's?

                  Comment


                    #10
                    Originally posted by mudskipper View Post
                    I have to confess that on opening the door, I did think "These toilets stink!" Why is it that men's toilets smell so much worse than women's?
                    Because we have to turn around mid flow to look at some daft bird that's walked in to the toilet and end up sprinkling the wall and floor.

                    Host of other reasons. Urinals only flush every so often if at all, you flush right after every pee. We can't get it all in the urinal to save our lives. Clears won't clean up when the floor is half an inch deep in raw piss.. And so on.

                    Next time you've had 10 pints and an alarming sway on. Try pouring your wine in to a 2 foot diameter glass over a 2 foot distance. It's nigh on impossible I tell ye!
                    Last edited by northernladuk; 18 October 2018, 09:46.
                    'CUK forum personality of 2011 - Winner - Yes really!!!!

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