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If you are bored and fancy a chuckle, read on...

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    If you are bored and fancy a chuckle, read on...

    For myself, I'm not sure whether to laugh or be scared.

    Project Pterosaur

    Mission Statement

    The goal of Project Pterosaur is to mount an expedition to locate and bring back to the United States living specimens of pterosaurs or their fertile eggs, which will be displayed in a Pterosaur Rookery that will be the center piece of the planned Fellowship Creation Science Museum and Research Institute (FCSMRI). Furthermore, the rookery facility will establish a breeding colony of pterosaurs in order to produce specimens that could then be put on display by other regional institutions or church groups.

    By doing all this, we hope to accomplish three goals:

    1. Support Creation Theory by showing the incorrectness of the philosophy of Evolutionism.
    2. Educate the population about Creation Science.
    3. Create excitement about Creation and the Bible in the public.

    I (Dr. Paley) am the founder and Chief Officer of the project. I will also be leading the expedition and acting as Science Liaison to the public. Funding is being provided by Fellowship University, the Fairlight Institute, and donations from wealthy Christian businessmen who wish to remain anonymous at this time.

    #2
    Oh. My. Goodness. I dont know whether to laugh or cry.

    Dr. Richard Paley is a teacher of Divinity and Theobiology at Fellowship University
    What on earth is Theobiology when it's at home? Edit: I just googled it and got a disturbing number of relevent results....

    But the best bit has to be:

    Velociraptors: Today terrorize the goat herders of Puerto Rico and are rumored to guard the remains of the Ark. They have become vicious since the Fall as the result of the effects of genetic entropy, making them too dangerous for the sort of interactive public experience we have in mind.
    There are no words....
    "Being nice costs nothing and sometimes gets you extra bacon" - Pondlife.

    Comment


      #3
      >Non-Christian natives encountered should be made to know the Word and of the Saving Grace of our Lord Jesus Christ. A Missiological Technician will accompany the expedition to witness and perform Baptisms as necessary.


      (What happens when the machetes come out I wonder...)
      His heart is in the right place - shame we can't say the same about his brain...

      Comment


        #4
        Chico? Chico? Wherefore art thee? The lord commands thee to go on this mission ...
        Hard Brexit now!
        #prayfornodeal

        Comment


          #5
          There's only one fate for missionaries... in the cooking pot.

          Comment


            #6
            from "Love All The People"
            by Bill Hicks
            Fundamentalist Christianity: fascinating. These people actually believe that the world is twelve thousand years old. Swear to God. Based on what? I asked them.

            "Well, we looked at all the people in the Bible and we added 'em up all the way back to Adam and Eve, their ages? Twelve thousand years."
            "Well, how f**king scientific, OK. I didn't know that you'd gone to so much trouble there. That's good. You believe the world's twelve thousand years old?"
            "That's right."
            "OK, I got one word to ask you, a one word question, ready?"
            "Uh huh."
            "Dinosaurs."

            You know, the world's twelve thousand years old and dinosaurs existed, and existed in that time, you'd think it would been mentioned in the f**king Bible at some point:

            And O, Jesus and the disciples walked to Nazareth. But the trail was blocked by a giant brontosaurus... with a splinter in its paw. And the disciples did run a-screamin'. "What a big f**king lizard, Lord!"
            "I'm sure gonna mention this in my book," Luke said.
            "Well, I'm sure gonna mention it in my book," Matthew said.
            But Jesus was unafraid. And he took the splinter from the brontosaurus paw, and the brontosaurus became his friend. And Jesus sent him to Scotland where he lived in a loch, O so many years, attracting fat American families with their fat f**kin' dollars to look for the Loch Ness Monster. And O the Scots did praise the Lord: "Thank you, Lord! Thank you, Lord!"

            Twelve thousand years old. But I actually asked this guy, "OK, dinosaur fossils-- how does that fit into your scheme of life? What's the deal?" He goes:

            "God put those here to test our faith."
            "I think God put you here to test my faith, dude. I think I've figured this out."

            Does that-- That's what this guy said. Does that bother anyone here? The idea that God might be f**king with our heads? Anyone have trouble sleeping restfully with that thought in their head? God's running around burying fossils: "Ho ho! We'll see who believes in me now, ha ha! I'm a prankster God. I am killing me, ho ho ho!" You know? You die, you go to St. Peter:

            "Did you believe in dinosaurs?"
            "Well, yeah. There were fossils everywhere. (trapdoor opens) Aaaaarhhh!"
            "You f**kin' idiot! Flying lizards? You're a moron. God was f**kin' with you!"
            "It seemed so plausible, aaaaaahh!"
            "Enjoy the lake of fire, f**ker!"

            They believe this. But you ever notice how people who believe in Creationism usually look pretty unevolved. Eyes really close together, big furry hands and feet? "I believe God created me in one day." Yeah, looks like he rushed it.

            Such a weird belief. Lots of Christians wear crosses around their necks. You think when Jesus comes back he's gonna want to see a f**king cross, man? "Ow." Might be why he hasn't shown up yet.

            "Man, they're still wearing crosses. f**k it, I'm not goin' back, Dad. No, they totally missed the point. When they start wearing fishes, I might show up again, but... let me bury fossils with you, Dad. f**k 'em, let's f**k with 'em! Hand me that brontosaurus head, Dad."




            excerpt from "Love All The People: Letters, Lyrics, Routines" published by Soft Skull Press, 2004.

            Comment


              #7
              What's really, really scaring me is that I'm still not sure if its a pi$$take or not. Guess that makes me a tool of Satan
              +50 Xeno Geek Points
              Come back Toolpusher, scotspine, Voodooflux. Pogle
              As for the rest of you - DILLIGAF

              Purveyor of fine quality smut since 2005

              CUK Olympic University Challenge Champions 2010/2012

              Comment


                #8
                [QUOTE=Captain Jack]For myself, I'm not sure whether to laugh or be scared.

                Project Pterosaur

                QUOTE]

                It seems the site is one huge Chico bait:

                http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/OBJECTIVE:_Ministries

                Kinda sad that the deluded souls are fake but what a great site. Think I might get me one of the T Shirts...

                Comment


                  #9
                  It seems the site is one huge Chico bait:

                  http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/OBJECTIVE:_Ministries

                  Kinda sad that the deluded souls are fake but what a great site. Think I might get me one of the T Shirts...
                  Praise the Lord!
                  +50 Xeno Geek Points
                  Come back Toolpusher, scotspine, Voodooflux. Pogle
                  As for the rest of you - DILLIGAF

                  Purveyor of fine quality smut since 2005

                  CUK Olympic University Challenge Champions 2010/2012

                  Comment


                    #10
                    Brilliant!!
                    Carpe Pactum

                    (does fuzzy logic tickle?)

                    Comment

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