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Kyajae
17th July 2007, 12:29
One in three householders keep weapons against intruders Linky (http://www.dailymail.co.uk/pages/live/articles/news/news.html?in_article_id=468981&in_page_id=1770)

Would you fight back?

DimPrawn
17th July 2007, 12:29
Uzi 9mm

thunderlizard
17th July 2007, 12:33
The last guy who tried to burgle me.


:suicide:

Burdock
17th July 2007, 12:33
One in three householders keep weapons against intruders Linky (http://www.dailymail.co.uk/pages/live/articles/news/news.html?in_article_id=468981&in_page_id=1770)

Would you fight back?

now that is a good question Kyajae.

I was thinking about this on the way to work. Some guy was saying how having a baseball bat next to him helped him to sleep easy.

If I started waving a weapon at an intruder they would just grab it off me and use it.

I think some kind of hi-tech solution is needed...i.e. press a button to release sleeping gas in the kitchen.


Cowards unite!

Troll
17th July 2007, 12:35
Skeletons

Clippy
17th July 2007, 12:37
One in three householders keep weapons against intruders Linky (http://www.dailymail.co.uk/pages/live/articles/news/news.html?in_article_id=468981&in_page_id=1770)

Would you fight back?

Don't need to.

Clippy Towers has a Panic Room installed. :wink :

SallyAnne
17th July 2007, 12:39
You dont need weapons - just batter them.

Take no shit, and let the anger be released - its the only way.

Let-Me-In
17th July 2007, 12:40
I have a kukri cunningly placed on the wall in case of intruders.....

Moscow Mule
17th July 2007, 12:41
Golf putter.

dotnetter
17th July 2007, 12:43
I got a big fuk off knife next to my bed, anyone comes in I'll make them a nice sandwhich!

The Lone Gunman
17th July 2007, 12:45
You should keep a kettle by your bed for your morning brew.

Boil it and take it downstairs to confront the intruder. Chuck the contents all over said intruder.

If plod asks, you were pouring a nice drop of camomile to help you sleep when you heard a noise. Took kettle without thinking. Paniced and threw water at burglar.

Charles Foster Kane
17th July 2007, 12:45
I got a big fuk off knife next to my bed, anyone comes in I'll make them a nice sandwhich!

Why would you want to make a burglar a sandwich?

Cooperinliverp00l
17th July 2007, 12:46
I got a big fuk off knife next to my bed, anyone comes in I'll make them a nice sandwhich!
hmmm making me hungry. Will pop round yours tonight

Clippy
17th July 2007, 12:49
I got a big fuk off knife next to my bed, anyone comes in I'll make them a nice sandwhich!

I'm more worried by you than any would be intruder! :eek:

Lockhouse
17th July 2007, 12:49
Nando's Spicy Sauce.

andy
17th July 2007, 12:50
extra hot chilli powder

el duder
17th July 2007, 12:51
You dont need weapons - just batter them.

Take no shit, and let the anger be released - its the only way.


Well its alright for you, you could just sit on them. The rest of us would have to use a weapon.

NoddY
17th July 2007, 12:54
Dim: Prawn cocktail sauce for cannibalistic nights in

dotnetter
17th July 2007, 12:56
Why would you want to make a burglar a sandwich?

You obviously havnt tasted my sandwiches

Swamp Thing
17th July 2007, 12:59
Couple of ice-axes in the cupboard. Nicely sharpened tips, and one of them has a hammer-head for bludgeoning work.

If the thieving feckers visit me, I'll do a Leon Trotsky on them.

King Cnvt
17th July 2007, 13:01
If any of you guys even touches an intruder the law will haul your ass infront of the judge and you'll be serving 15 years.

It is their human right to rob you.

I hope you have done a risk assessment at home incase the guy cuts himself forcing open your front door.

Charles Foster Kane
17th July 2007, 13:02
If any of you guys even touches an intruder the law will haul your ass infront of the judge and you'll be serving 15 years.

It is their human right to rob you.

I hope you have done a risk assessment at home incase the guy cuts himself forcing open your front door.

Not for making them a sandwich surely?

Cooperinliverp00l
17th July 2007, 13:04
I've got next door neighbours jewellery from last night's job

Burdock
17th July 2007, 13:04
Not for making them a sandwich surely?

The judge will look favourably upon your offering to make the intruder a sandwich, and will cut your sentence accordingly.

Remember to check if they are vegan / halal etc. to avoid further human rights difficulties.

EternalOptimist
17th July 2007, 13:06
I have all my ashtrays, packets of cigs, lighters etc hidden in my cupboard. I dont want to get done for smoking in a burglars place of work.








:rolleyes:

Swamp Thing
17th July 2007, 13:11
If any of you guys even touches an intruder the law will haul your ass infront of the judge and you'll be serving 15 years.

It is their human right to rob you.

I hope you have done a risk assessment at home incase the guy cuts himself forcing open your front door.

Well, I've done a risk assessment in case the guy falls onto my ice-axe and cuts himself; is that sufficient?

xoggoth
17th July 2007, 13:13
Air rifle, air pistol, baseball bat, Samurai sword, swordstick.

dotnetter
17th July 2007, 13:14
I used to leave a skate on the stairs before I went to bed, until the cat broke it's leg :rolleyes:

dotnetter
17th July 2007, 13:16
Air rifle, air pistol, baseball bat, Samurai sword, swordstick.

Kin ell, its a burgular not Freddy Kruger!

lilelvis2000
17th July 2007, 13:23
I'd be worried my little one would get a hold of it and take it to school. So yes I would like to keep a gun, but practically I can't.

dotnetter
17th July 2007, 13:26
I'd be worried my little one would get a hold of it and take it to school. So yes I would like to keep a gun, but practically I can't.

so what? at least he will be on par with all the other kids

Chugnut
17th July 2007, 13:59
I'd be worried my little one would get a hold of it and take it to school. So yes I would like to keep a gun, but practically I can't.

Throw him off the scent by giving him a crossbow.

realityhack
17th July 2007, 15:11
Following items easily and quickly obtainable in the case of a confrontation:

Claw hammer
Ice axe
Ice hockey stick
Stanley knife
Scalpel
Heavy maglite
Aerosol + lighter

Don't keep them by the bedside as I'd kill myself if I sleepwalk.

My dad has an original 17th Century Katana and a wakizashi sword hanging on the wall outside his bedroom, along with a sabre, a rapier and an asagai.

We'd both use them. All of them.

freakydancer
17th July 2007, 15:13
If anyone broke into my house I'd light a cigarette, sit down and watch them choke to death from passive smoking.

Old Greg
17th July 2007, 15:17
If anyone broke into my house I'd light a cigarette, sit down and watch them choke to death from passive smoking.
Not in a burglar's workplace you won't, young man.

freakydancer
17th July 2007, 15:18
Not in a burglar's workplace you won't, young man.

I forgot about that - I'd have to stand in the garden and watch them.

PRC1964
17th July 2007, 15:22
If your registered office is your home, does that mean you can't smoke there?

I can see that pissing off a few people I know.

Old Greg
17th July 2007, 15:22
I forgot about that - I'd have to stand in the garden and watch them.
Presumably, the burglar has to put up a no smoking sign on entering the building.

Old Greg
17th July 2007, 15:22
If your registered office is your home, does that mean you can't smoke there?

I can see that pissing off a few people I know.
I think you're OK if you're the only person working there and you don't have clients/members of the public in your office.

Charles Foster Kane
17th July 2007, 15:23
I forgot about that - I'd have to stand in the garden and watch them.

That deviates from your passive smoking strategy surely? Why don't you just make them a sandwich which contains a lot of saturated fat or something?

Old Greg
17th July 2007, 15:25
That deviates from your passive smoking strategy surely? Why don't you just make them a sandwich which contains a lot of saturated fat or something?
You'll have to register first as a catering premesis and undertake a basic food handling hygiene course first.

Burdock
17th July 2007, 15:28
i'm glad I read this thread - I had no idea about my responsibilities.

i had better stop off at Morrisons on the way home and stock up on bread in case of nocturnal visitors.

how many different fillings should I offer?

Number9
17th July 2007, 15:28
Gas mask and pepper spray with a nice baseball bat, just to control them if they start jumping around ! Now who would be more scared, the burglar or the householder. Gasmasks always scare me !

Old Greg
17th July 2007, 15:31
i'm glad I read this thread - I had no idea about my responsibilities.

i had better stop off at Morrisons on the way home and stock up on bread in case of nocturnal visitors.

how many different fillings should I offer?
I recommend at least one suitable for a diabetic diet and one low cholesterol (but you may be able to combine the two if necessary).

Charles Foster Kane
17th July 2007, 15:46
I recommend at least one suitable for a diabetic diet and one low cholesterol (but you may be able to combine the two if necessary).

You should really make sure you have a decent selection of breads also, ciabatta, bloomer, bap etc. You can't expect a burglar to eat just anything because you are unadventurous with your bread purchases.

Burdock
17th July 2007, 15:48
You should really make sure you have a decent selection of breads also, ciabatta, bloomer, bap etc. You can't expect a burglar to eat just anything because you are unadventurous with your bread purchases.

You could always pop out to the nearest 24/7? Would allow the burglar to work in peace too.

Diver
17th July 2007, 15:49
three mince pies. a glass of sherry and a stocking.

Charles Foster Kane
17th July 2007, 15:50
three mince pies. a glass of sherry and a stocking.

Hmmm, don't much fancy the sandwiches at your house.

Churchill
17th July 2007, 16:15
I got a big fuk off knife next to my bed, anyone comes in I'll make them a nice sandwhich!

Of course you will. Have you by chance had any combat training?

dotnetter
17th July 2007, 16:23
Of course you will. Have you by chance had any combat training?

Nah I just put them on normally like everyone else :freaky:

Alf W
17th July 2007, 17:59
The police guidance on this is lame. Friend of mine had someone break in whilst he was upstairs and they nicked their keys and stole both cars. The police advice was just to let them take the cars and not have a go.

Personally I think people should be encouraged to have 'deterrents' in the house to make these little sh1t-bags think twice about what could happen to them if caught.

I have a hickory sledge-hammer handle hidden in my wardrobe and I wouldn't think twice about battering any burglar I found in our house. Yes, a burglar could use it on me but I'd get first swing in and I think that puts the odds hugely in my favour.

A friend in Alabama was advised by the sheriff to shoot any intruders on her land but make sure some part of the burglar was in the house before calling the police. That's possibly a bit extreme.

Warrior Princess
17th July 2007, 18:56
Following items easily and quickly obtainable in the case of a confrontation:

Claw hammer
Ice axe
Ice hockey stick
Stanley knife
Scalpel
Heavy maglite
Aerosol + lighter

Don't keep them by the bedside as I'd kill myself if I sleepwalk.

My dad has an original 17th Century Katana and a wakizashi sword hanging on the wall outside his bedroom, along with a sabre, a rapier and an asagai.

We'd both use them. All of them.

Bloody hell RH – that’s some collection you have there mate!

Board Game Geek
17th July 2007, 23:22
Although I have a small collection of weaponry (Egyptian ceremonial dagger, ceremonial Athamé, Rapier & small ceremonial short sword), I wouldn't dream of using them for fear of getting banged up for 15 years. I *might* brandish one to scare them away.

To be honest, the best defense is not to have anything worth nicking in the first place.

If you park an expensive car on the drive, have expensive things in your house, they are only going to get nicked eventually.

n5gooner
18th July 2007, 08:32
still nothing I can disclose...

Old Greg
18th July 2007, 08:52
I wonder what would happen if someone used their weapon to injure a policeman who was raiding their house, honestly believing it was a robber. The police have a defence that they honestly believed a man was armed when shooting (the de Menezes case and Stanley, the man with the table leg). So presumably it would work to other way? Or maybe not, now I think about it.

Churchill
18th July 2007, 08:54
I wonder what would happen if someone used their weapon to injure a policeman who was raiding their house, honestly believing it was a robber. The police have a defence that they honestly believed a man was armed when shooting (the de Menezes case and Stanley, the man with the table leg). So presumably it would work to other way? Or maybe not, now I think about it.

I won't stop for unmarked Police cars. I simply drive to the nearest Police station. It's happened twice when I've been in the Porsche and the Police although irate do understand when you inform them.

Old Greg
18th July 2007, 08:56
I won't stop for unmarked Police cars. I simply drive to the nearest Police station. It's happened twice when I've been in the Porsche and the Police although irate do understand when you inform them.
Do you press your oil slick button?