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Clippy
3rd November 2008, 22:56
What's the cheekiest expense you have put through the books?

Thinking of buying an iPod Touch as an 'external hard drive' but not sure if this is too cheeky.

Diver
3rd November 2008, 23:02
Talcum powder.
I've been putting it through for years. only ever had to explain to HMRC, Why, about 15 times :smokin

Churchill
3rd November 2008, 23:07
Talcum powder.
I've been putting it through for years. only ever had to explain to HMRC, Why, about 15 times :smokin

Drysuit?

Diver
3rd November 2008, 23:08
Drysuit?

I was thinking more of young busty females covered in talk! Mmm! slippy slidy.

But yes you're right :ohwell

thunderlizard
3rd November 2008, 23:09
While serving as a rowing club treasurer, I got a specialist cleaner to remove the port stains from my stripey blazer and filed the bill under "equipment maintenance".

In the same capacity, I vaguely recall once buying a large bag of Woolworth's Pick & Mix, in order to help poach a couple of substitutes into our women's VIII on a race day. If so, I'm pretty sure I'd have expensed that too.

d000hg
3rd November 2008, 23:09
Drysuit?I was thinking of drug smuggling...

Diver
3rd November 2008, 23:11
I was thinking of drug smuggling...

I wouldn't if I were you.

The penalties are pretty stiff.

PS I have reported this to the drug squad, and you are now under surveillance :smokin

d000hg
3rd November 2008, 23:12
What's the cheekiest expense you have put through the books?

Thinking of buying an iPod Touch as an 'external hard drive' but not sure if this is too cheeky.I couldn't be bothered to actually claim it as an expense on my own company since it was only about £10, but I did recently buy a video-game for legitimate business reasons. It was one I worked on and didn't have a copy of; for a potential project I'm trying to win I needed to show videos of stuff I'd worked on.

Churchill
3rd November 2008, 23:14
I put a "Net Yaroze" through...

ASB
3rd November 2008, 23:14
Talcum powder.
I've been putting it through for years. only ever had to explain to HMRC, Why, about 15 times :smokin

Thats something to do with massage isn't it. Or for you maybe rubber.

Platypus
4th November 2008, 07:51
2 x return tickets to Bermuda :D

I also put through an iPod, various DVD players, Sat Nav and other toys. MyCo has a wide range of R&D interests.

You'll easily get an iPod touch thru as R&D. If in doubt, just register as a developer on Apple's site and print off the confirmation email.

NotAllThere
4th November 2008, 09:10
Evening meal. What was very cheeky (and wrong, I wouldn't do it now - I was young and foolish :emb), was that there were six of us and we all put the whole bill through expenses. A net profit at the tax-payers expense.

expat
4th November 2008, 09:16
(sigh) now I see why HMRC doesn't like some of you people.

Answer: none, I am not a thief.

Cyberman
4th November 2008, 09:37
Talcum powder.
I've been putting it through for years. only ever had to explain to HMRC, Why, about 15 times :smokin


It's a carcinogen !! be careful ..... :rolleyes:


http://www.cancer.org/docroot/CRI/content/CRI_2_6x_Talcum_Powder_and_Cancer.asp

Xenophon
4th November 2008, 09:40
I put a "Net Yaroze" through...

:tongue

I remember them. Home development PS kits? Came in a sexy black/dark grey colour as I recall.

moorfield
4th November 2008, 10:42
My nice polished oak dining table is my boardroom table. Apparently.

zara_backdog
4th November 2008, 10:45
MP4 player for my hubby's Xmas pressie last year - very good for downloading web-seminars for work purposes only you understand:happy

OwlHoot
4th November 2008, 10:48
Evening meal. What was very cheeky (and wrong, I wouldn't do it now - I was young and foolish :emb), was that there were six of us and we all put the whole bill through expenses. A net profit at the tax-payers expense.

When I was a permie, working at customer site and staying in hotels, we used to put vast quantities of booze through on expenses as "pudding".

Those must have been the most expensive, gold-leaf encrusted truffle-laden puddings ever :D

Churchill
4th November 2008, 10:48
:tongue

I remember them. Home development PS kits? Came in a sexy black/dark grey colour as I recall.

Yup, I'm trying to get a couple of PS3's for R&D purposes - Cell processor, dontchaknow...

Diver
4th November 2008, 10:51
It's a carcinogen !! be careful ..... :rolleyes:


http://www.cancer.org/docroot/CRI/content/CRI_2_6x_Talcum_Powder_and_Cancer.asp

Yes that report is very definitive isn't it :rollin::rollin:

Spacecadet
4th November 2008, 10:55
When I was a permie, working at customer site and staying in hotels, we used to put vast quantities of booze through on expenses as "pudding".

When i worked as a permie we didn't even bother hiding the booze, just hand in the entire receipt:

Beer €5
Burger €10
Beer €5
Beer €5
Beer €5
Beer €5
Beer €5
Beer €5
Whisky €7
Whisky €7
Whisky €7

I was never once pulled up on expenses, even managed to get a case of duty free beers on the expense account once :smokin

Probably explains why they went bust

NotAllThere
4th November 2008, 11:25
At one place, a new boy was summoned to the IT Directors office.

- What's this beer here?
- It was just the one, with my meal - I thought that'd be ok.
- Certainly not - we expect a much larger bar bill than that. You make the rest of us look bad. Don't do it again.

NotAllThere
4th November 2008, 11:25
(sigh) now I see why HMRC doesn't like some of you people.

Answer: none, I am not a thief.

On the other hand, you are self-righteous. Well done!

Ruprect
4th November 2008, 11:34
If you want an iPod touch, why don't you just get an iPhone?

css_jay99
7th December 2008, 10:24
If you want an iPod touch, why don't you just get an iPhone?

on as serious note, can i get the iphone as an mp3 expense?

Ardesco
7th December 2008, 12:23
on as serious note, can i get the iphone as an mp3 expense?

Why not as a phone expense......

TheFaQQer
7th December 2008, 13:37
Why not as a phone expense......

Maybe HMRC would recognize that it's great as a gadget and carp as a phone and disallow it??

Ardesco
7th December 2008, 14:02
Works fine as a phone, people can use it to talk to me and I can use it to talk to them. What more do you need??? :wink

NetwkSupport
8th December 2008, 07:53
car hire for my holiday in sicily :eyes

BoredBloke
8th December 2008, 10:23
I'm putting through my recent trip to New York as I was there to spec out the place with a view to taking a long term contract at Bristol Myers Squibb - helps that I can get somebody to vouch for me there. Unfortunately I didn't like it so I won't be taking the contract. :wink

TCL
8th December 2008, 12:11
Just this month I put through a £200 restraunt bill for me, the wife and two of ours friends. If push comes to shove I'll say we were discussing investement opportunites (which we did, very breifly, my friend is a pension fund manager)