Christmas carols. here

[EternalOptimist]

What funny lines did you have for Christmas songs when you were a kid ?



While shepherds washed their socks by night
all seated round the tub
an angel of the lord came down
and asked them for some grub

[NickFitz]

While shepherds washed their socks by night
all seated round the tub
an angel of the lord came down
and asked them for some grub

In olden times (i.e. your and my parents) the last two lines would have been:

A bar of Sunlight Soap came down,
And they began to scrub.

OT, but your current sig reminds me of a line I once came up with that amused a dyslexic girlfriend of mine: "Dyslexics of the world untie! You have nothing to lose but your china!"

[threaded]

The Støvledance, by De Nattergale

There is whiteøl in the tønde
then the fest will soon begynde.
Put some whiteøl in your cup
when it's drukken fill it up.

I can hop, I can run, and it's very very fun
klask your lår, klask your støvle.
I can hop, I can run, and it's very fun,
glem the trouble - and the bøvl.

This is a song I like to høre
this is music for my øre.
Dance a little støvle dance
dance it while you have a chance.

I can hop, I can run, and it's very very fun
klask your lår, klask your støvle.
I can hop, I can run, and it's very fun,
glem the trouble - and the bøvl.

One and two and three and fire
go and swing the nissepiger.
Five and six and syv and eight
that is good for a nisseknæjt.

I can hop, I can run, and it's very very fun
klask your lår, klask your støvle.
I can hop, I can run, and it's very fun,
glem the trouble - and the bøvl.

There is whiteøl in the tønde
then the fest will soon begynde.
Put some whiteøl in your cup
when it's drukken fill it up.

I can hop, I can run, and it's very very fun
klask your lår, klask your støvle.
I can hop, I can run, and it's very fun,
glem the trouble - and the bøvl.

I can hop, I can run, and it's very very fun
klask your lår, klask your støvle.
I can hop, I can run, and it's very fun,
glem the trouble - and the bøvl.

Gynther danser lig' a little
Gynther danser lig' a little
Gynther danser lig' a little støvle dance

[NotAllThere]

We used to sing "While shepherds" to the tune of Ilkley Moor Bah Tat.

Then the old playground favorite.

Jingle Bells, Bingley Smells
Batman flew away
...something...
And Bingley had to pay.

All the others I recall were probably from the Two Ronnies Christmas Special

[Ruprect]

If you haven't heard Christmas bl*w job, to the tune of "Jingle bell rock", you really should. Google it.

It starts off: "stroke-a my, lick-a my, suck-a my ....(rhymes with 'rock')" etc.

[wurzel]

To the tune of Deck The Halls -

Donny Osmond is a fairy tra la-la-la-la la-la-la-la
he is also fat and hairy tra la-la-la-la la-la-la-la etc etc

[BoredBloke]

What funny lines did you have for Christmas songs when you were a kid ?



While shepherds washed their socks by night
all seated round the tub
an angel of the lord came down
and asked them for some grub

My son sings an updated version

While shepherds washed their socks by night
all watching ITV
an angel of the lord came down
and Installed SKY TV

[Purple Dalek]

My son sings an updated version

While shepherds washed their socks by night
all watching ITV
an angel of the lord came down
and Installed SKY TV

Typical of modern youth, it doesn't quite fit the metre.

[NotAllThere]

My son sings an updated version

While shepherds washed their socks by night
all watching ITV
an angel of the lord came down
and Installed SKY TV

And switched it to BBC. ( Two Ronnies )

Good King Wencelas look out
Of his bedroom window
Silly bastard he fell out
On a red hot cinder
Brightly shone his bum that night
Oh the pain was cruel
Then a poor man came in sight
Gathering north sea oil...

And while checking the lyrics, I came across this gem:

Oh Tannenbaum, oh Tannenbaum,
der Opa pupst im Kofferraum
Die Oma ruft die Polizei
die Polizei kommt nakadei

...
die Oma hängt am Gartenzaun
der Opa ruft die Feuerwehr,
die Feuerwehr kommt mit Gewähr...