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Give the ex nothing or something ?

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    Give the ex nothing or something ?

    .....
    Last edited by Bumfluff; 30 December 2008, 00:59.

    #2
    You owe her nothing. Make sure you stand that way legally too. Move on.

    http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Succubus

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      #3
      Go to a lawyer for advice.

      Other than that, if you've a few grand knocking about and feeling lonely, blow it on taking a couple of high class hookers on a wild week-long party somewhere warm like Grand Canaria.

      HTH

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        #4
        Will it bother you when you are lying on your death-bed reflecting on your life? If not, then fine. Don't give her anything.

        If it will bug you till the day you die then give her the 5 grand. It'll be cheaper for you in the long run because it will be off your conscience.
        When money ceases to be the tool by which men deal with one another, then men become the tools of men. Blood, whips and guns--or dollars. Take your choice - Ayn Rand, Atlas.

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          #5
          Originally posted by Bumfluff View Post
          Split with ex of 9 years in June, she left me we weren't right for each other, it wasnt mutal at the time but I agree now it was for the best.

          Anyway cut a long story short cant shift the house so I said I would take it on but not pay her anything for her share, reason being is her share is worth 0 now due to housing crash, I said I would take house on to get it over and done with. She is 32, living back at home, has no money and big debts she is now asking me for some £5k-£10k, part of me feels I should help her out but then the other part of me thinks I dont owe her anything we werent married no kids.

          Do you think I should give her a few k just to get it over and done with or stand firm and tell her no, my mum recons I should give her £5k.
          Don't really know the answer to whether you should give her the dosh or not.

          But if you do give her the £5k mentioned, I would do it under the guise that you have bought out her share of the property as a gesture of good will type of thing to prevent any future claims she may make on the property.

          I know you say her share is not worth anything, but if you are gonna give her money anyway, at least this way you are actually "buying protection" against any future claims against the house regardless of whether such a claim would have any merit.

          As ever, I ain't qualified to give this advice so suggest you speak to a solicitor or someone even more knowledgeable such as atw!

          Comment


            #6
            Originally posted by Clippy View Post
            Don't really know the answer to whether you should give her the dosh or not.

            But if you do give her the £5k mentioned, I would do it under the guise that you have bought out her share of the property as a gesture of good will type of thing to prevent any future claims she may make on the property.

            I know you say her share is not worth anything, but if you are gonna give her money anyway, at least this way you are actually "buying protection" against any future claims against the house regardless of whether such a claim would have any merit.

            As ever, I ain't qualified to give this advice so suggest you speak to a solicitor or someone even more knowledgeable such as atw!
            Gosh, that is a really good sensible idea.

            MODERATORS: Someone's posting sense in General!

            Burn the heretic!

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              #7
              How is it she did not get 50% of your large cash reserves safely stored in prime Icelandic banks?

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                #8
                if you bought the house together and the deeds are in both your names, get a solicitor involved and get her to sign it over to you.

                If the house has depreciated in value then you owe her nowt.

                You weren't married, there were no kids involved.

                If she's in debt and living at home, why are you so guilty about it, it was her choice to end the relationship.

                Why feel guilty because you're in a position to pay the mortgage and she's not.
                "Ask not what you can do for your country. Ask what's for lunch." - Orson Welles

                Norrahe's blog

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                  #9
                  Originally posted by norrahe View Post

                  If she's in debt and living at home, why are you so guilty about it, it was her choice to end the relationship.

                  Why feel guilty because you're in a position to pay the mortgage and she's not.
                  Agreed. Another of life’s problems solved by CUK’s agony aunts; we're unsympathetic bastards, but we're effective!
                  And what exactly is wrong with an "ad hominem" argument? Dodgy Agent, 16-5-2014

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                    #10
                    was/is she a nice person [as in a decent human] - do you get on still?

                    Are her debts due to silly reasons or genuine Labour incompetence?

                    If the above hold true - Id be inclined to give her some cash - but equally as another poster said make sure she cant come after you in few years when the house is worth something [you hope]

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