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The Company Song

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    #1

    The Company Song

    Yesterday I asked the congregation why time reporting systems are so cack, and was enlightened by several helpful answers.

    Today I have a subject about which I need not really debate it’s cackness. The company song. I have been presented with a CD containing the new ClientCo company song, with the lyrics on the back of the wrapper. It’s in Dutch but I shall translate the refrain to give you an indication of it’s crapulence;

    Further…
    Even with the wind against us
    I won’t leave you standing
    I won’t let you go
    Together with one goal
    We’ll go further.

    Sung in the Dutch ‘smartlap’ style; a sort of bastard crossover of German folk music and Engelbert Humperdinck style crooning.

    What gets into the heads of people who dream up this cack?
    Anyone got any more nauseating examples?
    And what exactly is wrong with an "ad hominem" argument? Dodgy Agent, 16-5-2014
    Tags: None
    #2
    Originally posted by Mich the Tester View Post
    Anyone got any more nauseating examples?
    How about: "Things can only get better"

    Comment

      #3
      Originally posted by Doggy Styles View Post
      How about: "Things can only get better"
      Yes, forgot that one. Truly vomit inducing.
      And what exactly is wrong with an "ad hominem" argument? Dodgy Agent, 16-5-2014

      Comment

        #4
        in big companies people get PAID to produce these things!
        This default font is sooooooooooooo boring and so are short usernames

        Comment

          #5
          One of my clients had a company "sound". It was intended to be used on all PCs as often as possible.

          They ditched it fairly quickly.

          Comment

            #6
            Originally posted by Mich the Tester View Post
            Yesterday I asked the congregation why time reporting systems are so cack, and was enlightened by several helpful answers.

            Today I have a subject about which I need not really debate it’s cackness. The company song. I have been presented with a CD containing the new ClientCo company song, with the lyrics on the back of the wrapper. It’s in Dutch but I shall translate the refrain to give you an indication of it’s crapulence;

            Further…
            Even with the wind against us
            I won’t leave you standing
            I won’t let you go
            Together with one goal
            We’ll go further.

            Sung in the Dutch ‘smartlap’ style; a sort of bastard crossover of German folk music and Engelbert Humperdinck style crooning.

            What gets into the heads of people who dream up this cack?
            Anyone got any more nauseating examples?
            Not bad altough a wee bit syrupy.

            How about this ....

            Up at eight, you can't be late

            for Matthew & Son, he won't wait.

            Watch them run down to platform one
            And the eight-thirty train to Matthew & Son.

            Matthew & Son, the work's never done, there's always something new.
            The files in your head, you take them to bed, you're never ever through.
            And they've been working all day, all day, all day!

            There's a five minute break and that's all you take,
            for a cup of cold coffee and a piece of cake.

            Matthew & Son, the work's never done, there's always something new.
            The files in your head, you take them to bed, you're never ever through.
            And they've been working all day, all day, all day!

            He's got people who've been working for fifty years
            No one asks for more money cuz nobody dares
            Even though they're pretty low and their rent's in arrears

            Matthew & Son, Matthew & Son, Matthew & Son, Matthew & Son,
            And they've been working all day, all day, all day!

            Comment

              #7
              Originally posted by AlfredJPruffock View Post
              Not bad altough a wee bit syrupy.

              How about this ....

              Up at eight, you can't be late

              for Matthew & Son, he won't wait.
              I don’t think ClientCo can afford Cat Stevens in their current predicament.
              And what exactly is wrong with an "ad hominem" argument? Dodgy Agent, 16-5-2014

              Comment

                #8
                Originally posted by Mich the Tester View Post
                I don’t think ClientCo can afford Cat Stevens in their current predicament.
                What about Shakin' Stevens?

                Comment

                  #9
                  Originally posted by minestrone View Post
                  What about Shakin' Stevens?
                  Perhaps more appropriate, but still beyond their budget;

                  This ole house is gettin' shaky
                  This ole house is gettin' old
                  This ole house lets in the rain
                  This ole house lets in the cold
                  On my knees I'm gettin' chilly
                  But I feel no fear nor pain
                  'Cause I see an angel peekin'
                  Through the broken windowpane

                  (Ain't a-gonna need this house no longer)
                  (Ain't a-gonna need this house no more)
                  Ain't got time to fix the shingles
                  Ain't a-got time to fix the floor
                  Ain't got time to oil the hinges
                  Nor to mend no windowpane
                  Ain't a-gonna need this house no longer
                  She's a-gettin' ready to meet the saints
                  And what exactly is wrong with an "ad hominem" argument? Dodgy Agent, 16-5-2014

                  Comment

                    #10
                    Olden days from Fujitsu 2002, not long after the rebrand from ICL. we were all sent this via email and posted on the intranet: http://anthems.zdnet.co.uk/anthems/fujitsu.mp3

                    Lyrics and report here: http://resources.zdnet.co.uk/article...2125636,00.htm

                    I didn't say it was your ******* fault, I said I was blaming you!

                    Comment

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