How Safe is your House?

[bogeyman]

The recession should not inevitably lead to more burglaries despite past increases, the home secretary has said.

Jacqui Smith told the BBC while it had been the "historical situation", it was not a foregone conclusion this time.

So. Jackboot Jacqui has spoken, the dog-faced, illiterate, totalitarian bitch.

Well that's alright then.

Anyone tooling up? Keeping a shotgun under the bed? A blackjack in the sock drawer?

I work abroad a lot am becoming increasingly concerned about leaving my family to fend for themselves.

[BrilloPad]

People down the road burgled : but they had an expensive car. The thieves mostly wanted the keys to that but took a few other things while in.

Sometimes I am pleased I can only afford an X reg peugeot....

[expat]

So. Jackboot Jacqui has spoken, the dog-faced, illiterate, totalitarian bitch.

Well that's alright then.

Anyone tooling up? Keeping a shotgun under the bed? A blackjack in the sock drawer?

I work abroad a lot am becoming increasingly concerned about leaving my family to fend for themselves.

I worry about that too. Obviously knifevest Jacqui has it sorted, just have the coppers keep an eye on the place, but for the rest of us....? Any customers of ADT here?

[minestrone]

Hockey stick under the bed, I have a pretty big house and might not even hear them come in.

Neighbour got done, they just picked up a massive boulder from the garden and whacked it through the 'unbreakable' back door window.

I always take laptops and cameras upstairs at night so if people are looking in the windows they don't see a target.

[FSM with Cheddar]

Got a big dog that wouldn't hesitate to eat someone entering his property without permission.

[expat]

Hockey stick under the bed, I have a pretty big house and might not even hear them come in.

Like bogeyman, I work away a lot and leave a family behind. I'm not worried about burglary while out, so much as intruder while in.

[norrahe]

I don't have an alarm per se, but the previous owner couldn't be bothered taking down the box outside or the sensors inside. As we discovered when we bought the house last year.

So it looks like there is one.

Though that's not so much a deterrent these days as people ignore them when they go off.

[threaded]

I keep pigs, free range, no worries.

[bogeyman]

I keep pigs, free range, no worries.

What sort of pigs?

My Dad's uncle was pig farmer. Spent many summer school holidays on his farm.

Not sure I'd recommend them as a defence measure though! At night they tend to sleep very soundly and won't get up for anything.

[bogeyman]

But they're wonderful for getting rid of the bodies of miscreants that you've blown away with the slightly dodgy AK...

Shades of Mr Wu in Deadwood.... "****suckers"...

No, I use the acid bath for that.