• Visitors can check out the Forum FAQ by clicking this link. You have to register before you can post: click the REGISTER link above to proceed. To start viewing messages, select the forum that you want to visit from the selection below. View our Forum Privacy Policy.
  • Want to receive the latest contracting news and advice straight to your inbox? Sign up to the ContractorUK newsletter here. Every sign up will also be entered into a draw to WIN £100 Amazon vouchers!

And you think your life is bad?

Collapse
X
  •  
  • Filter
  • Time
  • Show
Clear All
new posts

    And you think your life is bad?

    FMY
    Brexit is having a wee in the middle of the room at a house party because nobody is talking to you, and then complaining about the smell.

    #2
    Is that Wilmslow's diary?
    Science isn't about why, it's about why not. You ask: why is so much of our science dangerous? I say: why not marry safe science if you love it so much. In fact, why not invent a special safety door that won't hit you in the butt on the way out, because you are fired. - Cave Johnson

    Comment


      #3
      Today, a woman walked out of the Humane Society with a cat carrier. I said, "Oh did you adopt him?" She walked past and started crying. She had just brought her cat in to be euthanized.
      Sounds like an encounter between my wife and my ex.

      You've come right out the other side of the forest of irony and ended up in the desert of wrong.

      Comment


        #4
        Borderline NSFW
        Down with racism. Long live miscegenation!

        Comment


          #5
          "Today, I found out my girlfriend's password for okcupid is "i_love_mike". My name is not Mike. "

          "Today, I received an email invitation to a dating web site. It was from my father-in-law."

          "Today, at the urinal a guy came up next to me to do his business. He stared over at me, looked down, laughed and then left."

          The proud owner of 125 Xeno Geek Points

          Comment


            #6
            "Today, my boss caught me playing games on the computer for 4 hours. My boss told me to feel free and continue, but to pack my stuff up and leave when I was done. FML"

            Comment

            Working...
            X