I'll marmelise her

[EternalOptimist]

my daughter turned 16 in November. She lives with her mum and I rang last night to make arrangements for her to stay this weekend.

Arrangements all made she says 'Dad, I have something to tell you'

of course I get a large stream of brown adrenalin running straight down my leg

'er, what is it ?'

'er.....'

by now I have a large throbbing vein in my temple and my heart is doing 200 revs

'come on, spit it out, you know you can tell me anything'

'It's my fringe, I tried to do it myself and it's a bit wonky'

massive floods of relief

I'll blooming marmelise her

[Rookie]

I think that you should have a go at your fringe just to make her feel better.

[Moscow Mule]

Kids eh?

Can't live with em, can't kill them then chop them up and hide the bits under your lawn.

[EternalOptimist]

I think that you should have a go at your fringe just to make her feel better.

my fringe was last seen heading north in 1990


it's now kept in a box under the bed

[thelace]

Kids eh?

Can't live with em, can't kill them then chop them up and hide the bits under your lawn.

You can't?

Boy am I in deep doodoos

[d000hg]

my daughter turned 16 in November. She lives with her mum and I rang last night to make arrangements for her to stay this weekend.

Arrangements all made she says 'Dad, I have something to tell you'

of course I get a large stream of brown adrenalin running straight down my leg

'er, what is it ?'

'er.....'

by now I have a large throbbing vein in my temple and my heart is doing 200 revs

'come on, spit it out, you know you can tell me anything'

'It's my minge, I tried to do it myself and it's a bit wonky'

massive floods of relief

I'll blooming marmelise her

[Bagpuss]

Marmelise, haven't heard that for a while. Along with Codswallop

[Bear]

That's just wrong!!!! very wrong!!!!!!

[EternalOptimist]

you shouldn't put thoughts like that in a dad's head. I'm going tell bishop Sentamu about you, you sinner.

[expat]

Kids eh?

Can't live with em, can't kill them then chop them up and hide the bits under your lawn.

Should we have a poll on that?