PDA

View Full Version : Dog wee



Gravy Train
17th March 2009, 11:56
Hopefully someone here can help me

I came out to the car this morning and noticed dog wee all over the rear nearside wheel of my car. We regularly have dogs fouling the pavement and i am aware that the thug living down the end of the road keeps several vicious looking dogs in some sort of shed in the back of his garden and is seen walking some of them regularly.

Now i can live with a bit of dog poo on my street but when the little tulip walking his mutt allows him to piss on my porka then something's gotta be done.

This is a genuine post requiring a genuine solution, any practical suggestions are appreciated.

pmeswani
17th March 2009, 12:02
Hopefully someone here can help me

I came out to the car this morning and noticed dog wee all over the rear nearside wheel of my car. We regularly have dogs fouling the pavement and i am aware that the thug living down the end of the road keeps several vicious looking dogs in some sort of shed in the back of his garden and is seen walking some of them regularly.

Now i can live with a bit of dog poo on my street but when the little tulip walking his mutt allows him to piss on my porka then something's gotta be done.

This is a genuine post requiring a genuine solution, any practical suggestions are appreciated.

Not sure what you want us to say that is serious and practical. If you don't have the evidence to prove who did it, what are you going to do about it? And if you attempt to take pictures, you could get done for breach of privacy. If I were you, I'll forget about it. There's more important things in life to worry about.

DimPrawn
17th March 2009, 12:03
Phone 999. They like to here about this sort of thing.

Gravy Train
17th March 2009, 12:06
don't know what i was expecting - are there any cost effective motion sensitive cctv cameras that people are aware of? I would certainly like some evidence before i act

Mich the Tester
17th March 2009, 12:06
Buy some manure and spread it on the ground next to your car. With a bit of luck the dog will step in it then go home and spread it around it’s owner’s carpets.

Cyberman
17th March 2009, 12:06
Personally, I would have a word with the owner if I saw a dog fouling my property. That should be enough to any reasonable person.
If it continues to be a problem after that then I would involve the police because there could be a breach of the peace otherwise. :smokin

cailin maith
17th March 2009, 12:07
Hopefully someone here can help me

I came out to the car this morning and noticed dog wee all over the rear nearside wheel of my car. We regularly have dogs fouling the pavement and i am aware that the thug living down the end of the road keeps several vicious looking dogs in some sort of shed in the back of his garden and is seen walking some of them regularly.

Now i can live with a bit of dog poo on my street but when the little tulip walking his mutt allows him to piss on my porka then something's gotta be done.

This is a genuine post requiring a genuine solution, any practical suggestions are appreciated.

Maybe if whoever owned the dog let it shit on the bonnet, I could see why you could be offended but... it's just a bit of dog wee.

Cyberman
17th March 2009, 12:09
Maybe if whoever owned the dog let it tulip on the bonnet, I could see why you could be offended but... it's just a bit of dog wee.


Initially, it is a just a bit of dog wee, but if this happens on a regular basis, I would not simply ignore it. :eek

Gravy Train
17th March 2009, 12:10
Maybe if whoever owned the dog let it tulip on the bonnet, I could see why you could be offended but... it's just a bit of dog wee.

a one off bit of dog wee i could handle, but this, combined with the fouling of the streets outside my house has caused me to want to put a stop to this

Svalbaard
17th March 2009, 12:10
This is a solution kind of cribbed from Road Runner cartoons...

1. Fashion several cat shapes out of some C4 plastic exlposive bought from the ACME corporation by mail order.
2. Dig a tunnel under his shed (but start it from a neighbours garden).
3. Set up camera to monitor shed remotely.

You can see where this is going...

4. Plant cat shaped explosives under shed and run detonator lines back to tunnel head.
5. Connect detonator lines to switch.
6. Wait till aforementioned thug is in shed with dogs.
7. Press big red button.
8. Problem solved.

This is foolproof as the police will trace the tunnel back to your neighbours house, and arrest them instead of you. So you get rid of the dogs, Mr Thug and those nuisance neigbours as well as having a perfect clip to put on You Tube.

Genius I think you will agree.

Cyberman
17th March 2009, 12:12
a one off bit of dog wee i could handle, but this, combined with the fouling of the streets outside my house has caused me to want to put a stop to this


... and I would do the same. It's disgusting behaviour and is also a health hazard. :sick

Drewster
17th March 2009, 12:13
Hopefully someone here can help me
......
This is a genuine post requiring a genuine solution, any practical suggestions are appreciated.

I really really would not reccommend this solution as it is cruel to the poor dumb animal but......

Sprinkle some Pernod/Ricard in an arc about 2-3 ft from your wheel (only a very very small amount needed)

Sprinkle some very hot powdered chilli right next to your wheel (similar small amount)

Dog will love Pernod...... but not like chilli quite so much......
Unfortunately all dogs walking past your car will suffer......

Gravy Train
17th March 2009, 12:14
... and I would do the same. It's disgusting behaviour and is also a health hazard. :sick

joking aside i knew a girl when i was younger who contracted a terrible illness which ultimately took her life and was strongly believed to have been caused by dog sh#t

Gravy Train
17th March 2009, 12:25
This is a solution kind of cribbed from Road Runner cartoons...

1. Fashion several cat shapes out of some C4 plastic exlposive bought from the ACME corporation by mail order.
2. Dig a tunnel under his shed (but start it from a neighbours garden).
3. Set up camera to monitor shed remotely.

You can see where this is going...

4. Plant cat shaped explosives under shed and run detonator lines back to tunnel head.
5. Connect detonator lines to switch.
6. Wait till aforementioned thug is in shed with dogs.
7. Press big red button.
8. Problem solved.

This is foolproof as the police will trace the tunnel back to your neighbours house, and arrest them instead of you. So you get rid of the dogs, Mr Thug and those nuisance neigbours as well as having a perfect clip to put on You Tube.

Genius I think you will agree.

I agree - have you ever considered a change in career? ;)

minestrone
17th March 2009, 12:26
don't know what i was expecting - are there any cost effective motion sensitive cctv cameras that people are aware of? I would certainly like some evidence before i act

Buy a cheap web cam and use this freeware application..

http://www.visiongs.com/

I have is set up in my house and have a couple of web cams connected to my desktop PC, one points out the front window, you can set up motion detection and specifiy where in the screen triggers that.

Works really well. My web cams are really cheap but if you went up to 30-40 quid for one the pictures would be very high quality. Hope that helps.

Gravy Train
17th March 2009, 12:28
I really really would not reccommend this solution as it is cruel to the poor dumb animal but......

Sprinkle some Pernod/Ricard in an arc about 2-3 ft from your wheel (only a very very small amount needed)

Sprinkle some very hot powdered chilli right next to your wheel (similar small amount)

Dog will love Pernod...... but not like chilli quite so much......
Unfortunately all dogs walking past your car will suffer......


I get the first bit but not sure how the chilli powder will work? Is the animal supposed to lick the pernod and then move on to the chilli or dab it's schlong on the powder before or after it has relieved itself? !

Churchill
17th March 2009, 12:29
Hopefully someone here can help me

I came out to the car this morning and noticed dog wee all over the rear nearside wheel of my car. We regularly have dogs fouling the pavement and i am aware that the thug living down the end of the road keeps several vicious looking dogs in some sort of shed in the back of his garden and is seen walking some of them regularly.

Now i can live with a bit of dog poo on my street but when the little tulip walking his mutt allows him to piss on my porka then something's gotta be done.

This is a genuine post requiring a genuine solution, any practical suggestions are appreciated.

Wilmsloooow!!!

<Canned Laughter>

darmstadt
17th March 2009, 13:17
Dog wee can actually affect your wheels if you have alloys due to the acidic content. I would suggest connecting your battery to your wheels, that should put it off :grin

NotAllThere
17th March 2009, 13:19
...

Dog will love Pernod...... but not like chilli quite so much......
Unfortunately all dogs walking past your car will suffer......

Funniest thing I ever saw was a dog that jumped up to steal food from a plate and got a huge dollop of English mustard into the bargain.

Drewster
17th March 2009, 13:31
I get the first bit but not sure how the chilli powder will work? Is the animal supposed to lick the pernod and then move on to the chilli or dab it's schlong on the powder before or after it has relieved itself? !

Sorry GT I thought that you could've worked this out.....

Dog trotting along road happily, tail wagging, breathing in all those lovely smells....
Dog gets whiff of Pernod.... Yum Yum Dog love Pernod (well the aniseed smell anyway)....
Dog gets very excited and pulls towards nice Pernod smell....
YUM YUM YUM Really strong nice smell here......
Super Happy Dog takes great big snort.... Yeah! Pernod... I wonder if there is any more over here...... great big snort...... AWWWWWW F****** ARGGGHHHHHHH thats not F****** Pernod thats some B*****D has put F****G Chilli Powder there... ARGGGGGHHHHHH B*****D F*****G humans I'm NEVER NEVER NEVER going near that F****G tire again......

If you don't believe it you should sniff some Hot Chilli.... and then think that the average dogs sense of smell is 000s and 000s of times more sensitive than yours.......

You could also rub some Hot Chilli on your todger... it'll probably bring tears to your eyes too!

Cyberman
17th March 2009, 13:33
Sorry GT I thought that you could've worked this out.....

Dog trotting along road happily, tail wagging, breathing in all those lovely smells....
Dog gets whiff of Pernod.... Yum Yum Dog love Pernod (well the aniseed smell anyway)....
Dog gets very excited and pulls towards nice Pernod smell....
YUM YUM YUM Really strong nice smell here......
Super Happy Dog takes great big snort.... Yeah! Pernod... I wonder if there is any more over here...... great big snort...... AWWWWWW F****** ARGGGHHHHHHH thats not F****** Pernod thats some B*****D has put F****G Chilli Powder there... ARGGGGGHHHHHH B*****D F*****G humans I'm NEVER NEVER NEVER going near that F****G tire again......

If you don't believe it you should sniff some Hot Chilli.... and then think that the average dogs sense of smell is 000s and 000s of times more sensitive than yours.......

You could also rub some Hot Chilli on your todger... it'll probably bring tears to your eyes too!


I'll vouch for that !! :laugh

Svalbaard
17th March 2009, 13:37
Dog trotting along road happily, tail wagging, breathing in all those lovely smells....
Dog gets whiff of Pernod.... Yum Yum Dog love Pernod (well the aniseed smell anyway)....
Dog gets very excited and pulls towards nice Pernod smell....
YUM YUM YUM Really strong nice smell here......
Super Happy Dog takes great big snort.... Yeah! Pernod... I wonder if there is any more over here...... great big snort...... AWWWWWW F****** ARGGGHHHHHHH thats not F****** Pernod thats some B*****D has put F****G Chilli Powder there... ARGGGGGHHHHHH B*****D F*****G humans I'm NEVER NEVER NEVER going near that F****G tire again......


And to cap off dogs bad day, both it and owner get KABLOOMED to bits in an exploding shed type accident after returning from walk.

Drewster
17th March 2009, 13:38
I'll vouch for that !! :laugh

Can't speak for GT but if Cyberman tried to rub ANYTHING on my todger I garuantee it would bring tears to his eyes :grin :bluelight :wink

Drewster
17th March 2009, 13:39
And to cap off dogs bad day, both it and owner get KABLOOMED to bits in an exploding shed type accident after returning from walk.

OK I admit that I like your idea too!!!!

EternalOptimist
17th March 2009, 14:32
try pushing a small bit of blue tack down the doggies japs eye. hey presto - no more dog wee





:rolleyes:

Drewster
17th March 2009, 14:38
try pushing a small bit of blue tack down the doggies japs eye. hey presto - no more dog wee


This one I've gotta see...... will you be selling tickets?

Here Rottie Rottie Rottie.... SiT! SiT!
Good Rottie.... Now just grab the todger and.......
GRRRRRRRRRR F*****G Stupid F*****G Human!!! My F*****G nose is still sore from that F*****G Chilli Powder...
I've got a F******G headache from those exploding cats...
and now this F****G T****R wants to grab my F****G Nob!!!
I'll F*****G rip his F*****G arms off!!!!

Pondlife
17th March 2009, 14:42
Wilmsloooow!!!

<Canned Laughter>

How did it take 17 posts for that to come out? :eek:

CUK standards are slipping!

Money Money Money
18th March 2009, 13:48
I kid you not my mum has a dog turd wired up (to the electric fence round the pond) in our back garden to stop the younger of two labs eating it!

She was told by the lady next door it worked for her dog.

expat
18th March 2009, 13:58
Hopefully someone here can help me

I came out to the car this morning and noticed dog wee all over the rear nearside wheel of my car. We regularly have dogs fouling the pavement and i am aware that the thug living down the end of the road keeps several vicious looking dogs in some sort of shed in the back of his garden and is seen walking some of them regularly.

Now i can live with a bit of dog poo on my street but when the little tulip walking his mutt allows him to piss on my porka then something's gotta be done.

This is a genuine post requiring a genuine solution, any practical suggestions are appreciated.Move to a better area where you don't get people like that. This may require a change of country.

Or, if you insist on living where this is normal, garage your car.

Platypus
18th March 2009, 14:12
Personally, I would have a word with the owner if I saw a dog fouling my property. That should be enough to any reasonable person.
If it continues to be a problem after that then I would involve the police because there could be a breach of the peace otherwise. :smokin

Yep, agree totally. Just make sure you're prepared for the retribution attacks which will follow, broken windows, damage to vehicles, etc.

Alternatively, forget it.

Cyberman
18th March 2009, 14:27
Yep, agree totally. Just make sure you're prepared for the retribution attacks which will follow, broken windows, damage to vehicles, etc.

Alternatively, forget it.


My neighbours are too nice to resort to that sort of low-life behaviour. :happy

EternalOptimist
18th March 2009, 15:14
I kid you not my mum has a dog turd wired up (to the electric fence round the pond) in our back garden to stop the younger of two labs eating it!

She was told by the lady next door it worked for her dog.

what the fck are you on ?

a lab eating a dog turd = :eek:
a lab eating a back garden = :eek::eek:
two ladies discussing dogs eating dog turds = :eek::eek::eek:
two ladies discussing dogs eating back gardens = :eek::eek::eek::eek:
dogs eating fences around ponds = :eek::eek::eek::eek::eek:

please do an english a level or something then re post




:rolleyes:

Platypus
18th March 2009, 15:18
a lab eating a dog turd = :eek:

You've never owned a lab then?

EternalOptimist
18th March 2009, 15:24
You've never owned a lab then?

I have never owned a lab.
my daughter used to eat her own poo when she was a toddler, but I NEVER EVER, considered wiring up one of her turds to the mains as a deterrant.
I found that lacing the baby poo with pepper and garlic was much more humane, and fun.



:rolleyes:

Pogle
18th March 2009, 16:30
I have never owned a lab.
my daughter used to eat her own poo when she was a toddler, but I NEVER EVER, considered wiring up one of her turds to the mains as a deterrant.
I found that lacing the baby poo with pepper and garlic was much more humane, and fun.



:rolleyes:

EO - I salute you as a true humanitarian
;)

Platypus
18th March 2009, 17:14
EO - I salute you as a true humanitarian

Are you two still flirting? :rolleyes:

EternalOptimist
18th March 2009, 17:16
Are you two still flirting? :rolleyes:

I have something she wants
she has something I want





:rolleyes:

Platypus
18th March 2009, 17:18
Do hurry up and get on with it!

then tell us all about it ;)

Pogle
18th March 2009, 17:20
I have something she wants
she has something I want





:rolleyes:

- my signed photograph of Tony Hatch & Jackie Trent????

EternalOptimist
18th March 2009, 17:23
- my signed photograph of Tony Hatch & Jackie Trent????

I went around to the ex wifes flat a few years ago. She had cut me out of the wedding photo and put David Essex in my place.

Dunno what she ever saw in him



:rolleyes:

Platypus
18th March 2009, 17:31
I went around to the ex wifes flat a few years ago. She had cut me out of the wedding photo and put David Essex in my place

If that's true, it's very funny!

EternalOptimist
18th March 2009, 17:34
If that's true, it's very funny!

oh it's true.


she was the 'cyber bitch from hell'



:rolleyes:

BrollyBonce
18th March 2009, 21:57
I suggest you also request the EU arrange the destruction of all birds that might fly near your car.

I suggest you request the government arrange the destruction of all insects in the country in case they splat on your windscreen.

I suggest you ask your council to wash the pavement and roads you intend to drive on each day in case they are dirty.

Alternatively, go to California where surreal mentalists like you are happy.

d000hg
19th March 2009, 08:29
To be boring, why not just phone the council and say your street has a problem with dog fouling. It should be their job, not the police's. As long as you can be sure they won't tell anyone who complained, it's worth a shot... or you could use a false name or refuse to tell them.

Board Game Geek
19th March 2009, 08:43
Friends of mine have a dog that likes to chew parts of their garden ornaments.

Solution ?

They brought a special spray, that deters dogs and cats from going too close to the ornaments. Got it in Pet's World or some such place.

Works as well.

The spray is safe for humans, and also kind to furniture, since it can be used on carpets, upholstery, etc

So I'd assume it's probably ok for alloy wheels as well.

Money Money Money
19th March 2009, 09:39
Friends of mine have a dog that likes to chew parts of their garden ornaments.

Solution ?

They brought a special spray, that deters dogs and cats from going too close to the ornaments. Got it in Pet's World or some such place.

Works as well.

The spray is safe for humans, and also kind to furniture, since it can be used on carpets, upholstery, etc

So I'd assume it's probably ok for alloy wheels as well.


What about dog shit? Surely that can't smell any worse?

Drewster
19th March 2009, 09:44
What about dog tulip? Surely that can't smell any worse?

MMM You are a genius!! To stop the dog p*ssing on his car wheels all he needs to do is rub dog tulip into the wheels!! Awesome!!!

EternalOptimist
19th March 2009, 10:11
[QUOTE=Board Game Geek;800336]
They brought a special spray, that deters dogs and cats from going too close to the ornaments. Got it in Pet's World or some such place.
[QUOTE]

I was in one of those pet shops recently, specialises in lizards, snakes, spiders, tortoises etc.

They were seeling a product called 'MouseMaker'. the idea is that it's difficult sometimes to get a snake to eat a mouse, so you have to spray it to make it succulent and attractive.:eek:


http://www.underworldproducts.co.uk/reptile/reptile-supplements/liquid-supplements-mouse-maker/


:rolleyes:

Gravy Train
19th March 2009, 10:46
Friends of mine have a dog that likes to chew parts of their garden ornaments.

Solution ?

They brought a special spray, that deters dogs and cats from going too close to the ornaments. Got it in Pet's World or some such place.

Works as well.

The spray is safe for humans, and also kind to furniture, since it can be used on carpets, upholstery, etc

So I'd assume it's probably ok for alloy wheels as well.


Actually, the missus went out and bought something called CataPult - not tried it yet but will be spraying the stuff all over my freshly polished car... and the back garden area too - hopefully this will also deter the neighbours cats from parading over the back fence.

And for the chump who suggested I request the EU to detstroy all birds who fly overhead, dogs these days have owners. This one in partiucular most probably stood back to allow his chav accessory to p#ss on my Porsche (he also lets is carp all over the pavement without clearing it away).
Probably jealousy from this low life, I know, but hopefully it won't happen again.
Thanks for your suggestions!

Money Money Money
19th March 2009, 15:09
MMM You are a genius!! To stop the dog p*ssing on his car wheels all he needs to do is rub dog tulip into the wheels!! Awesome!!!

I was refering to me mums lab eating shit!

Drewster
19th March 2009, 15:24
I was refering to me mums lab eating tulip!

Many apologies.....

To stop your mums Lab eating tulip.... You rub tulip all over it!

Personally I would try picking up the tulip and throwing it away......

[but seriously] try the Hot Chilli suggested earlier[/but seriously]