Only a wizard can help

[Mich the Tester]

Translation of role description I just received in e-mail;

Agent is seeking a planner/MS Projects WIZARD!

Planner; must be a real MS-PROJECT WIZARD! ClientCo has set up a planning system. It’s complex; every project has it’s own structure: capacity, shifting timelines; this system has really strange characteristics.

Job is quite operational, mostly planning and monitoring. Maybe more analysis in future, but no guarantee.


***** is op zoek voor een relatie in Amsterdam naar een Planner, MS-projects wizard


Planner: moet echt een MS-PROJECTS-TOVENAAR zijn. Klant heeft onlangs een planning systeem opgezet. Is complex, ieder project heeft eigen structuur: capaciteit, schuiven van tijd, het systeem heeft echt opmerkelijke eigenschappen.

De opdracht is vrij operationeel, voornamelijk planning doornemen en bijhouden. Wellicht in de toekomst meer analyse, maar is geen garantie.


Does this actually mean ‘ClientCo is up tulip creek without a paddle, will somebody please come and help?’ Perhaps they sacked/made redundant the one person who knew how their planning system worked and now they don’t know where to start?

[Rookie]

Do you think that they would accept a sorcerer instead? Maybe a conjurer?

[Mich the Tester]

Do you think that they would accept a sorcerer instead? Maybe a conjurer?

Perhaps; they’ve obviously exhausted the experts and gurus and the only option left is supernatural gifts. The word bargepole comes to mind.

[TimberWolf]

Do you think that they would accept a sorcerer instead? Maybe a conjurer?

Is that a bog-standard or an MS sorcerer?

[Churchill]

Pardon me but after reading the description, it looks like they're looking for someone to drive the software, not run the projects.

What's the problem?

[Rookie]

Is that a bog-standard or an MS sorcerer?

There's nothing bog-standard about being a sorcerer. I'd say that a bog-standard conjurer would be far more plausible. Ten a penny those fellas. In fact we have several working here...

[Svalbaard]

In my younger Dungeoning and Dragoning days I was a level something Fighter/Mage so I could probabaly resolve this for them.

I can supply my own 20 sided dice although my overall delivery strategy, being turn based... would be a little less efficient than that of a normal PM.

[oracleslave]

Pardon me but after reading the description, it looks like they're looking for someone to drive the software, not run the projects.

What's the problem?

Well if they are looking in the direction of a tester for that then they really are clueless

[Mich the Tester]

Well if they are looking in the direction of a tester for that then they really are clueless

I'm sure I could knacker it for them and then provide a concise but complete report on the system's (lack of) quality and the risks of implementation.