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Jobserve Alchemy

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    Jobserve Alchemy

    Who designed this pile of crap? It just seems to fire random job specs at me regardless of technology, skillset, location, rate etc etc....

    Science isn't about why, it's about why not. You ask: why is so much of our science dangerous? I say: why not marry safe science if you love it so much. In fact, why not invent a special safety door that won't hit you in the butt on the way out, because you are fired. - Cave Johnson

    #2
    Design a CV randomizer and then spam the agencies.
    And what exactly is wrong with an "ad hominem" argument? Dodgy Agent, 16-5-2014

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      #3
      Another gem:

      IN Replacement Engineer Contract

      A pioneering Network Operator currently require an IN Replacement Engineer to join their expanding team. The successful IN Replacement Engineer will be responsible for the design (HLD and DLD) and architecture of Camel INAP and signalling designs for the Core Network. You will be responsible for initial signalling capacity dimensioning for the delivered designs, you will also design, test and implement network designs and services ensuring that the integrity of the core network is not compromised and that the KPI's are not breached. Candidates are required to have good working knowledge of 3G mobile networks (Nokia kit), you will have good working knowledge of GSM/UMTS, MTP, Camel and INAP, M3UA and Sigtran. A proven track record of design and delivery of circuit switched functionality especially in SSP associated services. You will have a proven history of designing and delivering UMTS networks and hands on experience of Nokia equipment hardware and software, experience of Nokia DX200 MML Project People Ltd is acting as an Employment Business in relation to this vacancy.
      Nope... I didn't understand a word of that.

      I do 2nd and 3rd line support, why do they keep sending me this drivel?
      Science isn't about why, it's about why not. You ask: why is so much of our science dangerous? I say: why not marry safe science if you love it so much. In fact, why not invent a special safety door that won't hit you in the butt on the way out, because you are fired. - Cave Johnson

      Comment


        #4
        Originally posted by gingerjedi View Post
        Another gem:



        Nope... I didn't understand a word of that.

        I do 2nd and 3rd line support, why do they keep sending me this drivel?
        I think its something to do with trains
        Brexit is having a wee in the middle of the room at a house party because nobody is talking to you, and then complaining about the smell.

        Comment


          #5
          Originally posted by gingerjedi View Post
          Who designed this pile of crap? It just seems to fire random job specs at me regardless of technology, skillset, location, rate etc etc....

          Yes it's complete sh*t. I don't remember switching it on and I've never bothered trying to switch it off. My email client now just sends all these emails straight to the spam bin.
          Moving to Montana soon, gonna be a dental floss tycoon

          Comment


            #6
            Originally posted by gingerjedi View Post
            Another gem:



            Nope... I didn't understand a word of that.

            I do 2nd and 3rd line support, why do they keep sending me this drivel?

            IN == Intelligent Networks. It's that part of the telephone system that routes calls dialled to non-geographic numbers into real locations.

            HTH

            tim

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