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10 ways to freak out a permie...

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    10 ways to freak out a permie...

    1 Recite entire movie scripts (e.g. "The Road Warrior," "Repo Man," Casablanca,") almost inaudibly.

    2 Kill roaches with a monkey wrench while playing Wagnerian arias on a kazoo. If a permie complains, explain that it is for your performing arts class (or hit him/her with the wrench).

    3 Collect all your urine in a small jug. Keep it on your desk.

    4 Chain yourself to your colleague's chair. Get him/her to bring you food.

    5 Leave your computer on when you are not using it. Turn it off when you are.

    6 Buy as many back issues of Horse and Hound as you can. Pretend to masturbate while reading them.

    7 Fake a heart attack. When your colleague gets the paramedics to come, pretend nothing happened.

    8 Eat glass.

    9 Smoke ballpoint pens.

    10 Smile. All the time.
    You can lead a fool to wisdom but you can't make him think.

    #2
    Originally posted by Amiga500 View Post
    10 ways to freak out anybody..
    Fixed that for you...
    ‎"See, you think I give a tulip. Wrong. In fact, while you talk, I'm thinking; How can I give less of a tulip? That's why I look interested."

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      #3
      Originally posted by Amiga500 View Post
      1 Recite entire movie scripts (e.g. "The Road Warrior," "Repo Man," Casablanca,") almost inaudibly.

      2 Kill roaches with a monkey wrench while playing Wagnerian arias on a kazoo. If a permie complains, explain that it is for your performing arts class (or hit him/her with the wrench).

      3 Collect all your urine in a small jug. Keep it on your desk.

      4 Chain yourself to your colleague's chair. Get him/her to bring you food.

      5 Leave your computer on when you are not using it. Turn it off when you are.

      6 Buy as many back issues of Horse and Hound as you can. Pretend to masturbate while reading them.

      7 Fake a heart attack. When your colleague gets the paramedics to come, pretend nothing happened.

      8 Eat glass.

      9 Smoke ballpoint pens.

      10 Smile. All the time.

      Sounds like most of the permies I've ever worked with.
      "Being nice costs nothing and sometimes gets you extra bacon" - Pondlife.

      Comment


        #4
        Originally posted by Amiga500 View Post
        10 ways to freak out a permie...
        10 ways to get out of a contract with a no-termination-clause early...
        My all-time favourite Dilbert cartoon, this is: BTW, a Dumpster is a brand of skip, I think.

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