• Visitors can check out the Forum FAQ by clicking this link. You have to register before you can post: click the REGISTER link above to proceed. To start viewing messages, select the forum that you want to visit from the selection below. View our Forum Privacy Policy.
  • Want to receive the latest contracting news and advice straight to your inbox? Sign up to the ContractorUK newsletter here. Every sign up will also be entered into a draw to WIN £100 Amazon vouchers!

The Cyberman Party's party manifesto

Collapse
X
  •  
  • Filter
  • Time
  • Show
Clear All
new posts

    The Cyberman Party's party manifesto

    My brain keeps trying to reject the messages for fear they may stick, but I think I have a few of Cyberman's views clear now.

    So, to sort out the country & economy, according to Cyberman we need to:

    - compulsory sterilisation for those on benefits;
    - sick, old criminals (e.g. Ronnie Biggs) should be automatically released;
    - mentally ill cyber-snoopers should be extradited for cost-saving reasons;
    - only mad people will be allowed to go to Muslim countries;
    - armed Police need to be storming mosques sooner rather than later;
    - northerners brought up by northerners should not be permitted to vote;
    - whenever 'flu breaks out the borders should be closed;
    - reduce public expenditure to expand the economy;
    - consensus is bad for strong government and will not be sought;
    - eliminate TB by stopping immigration;
    - shut the borders anyway just in case.

    (I'm fairly sure "chuck out the darkies", "prevent inter-racial breeding" and "invest in eugenics research" should be in there too somewhere, but as I said, my brain refuses to hold some concepts. And I only went back about five days to form the list above.)

    What is missing from the list?
    My all-time favourite Dilbert cartoon, this is: BTW, a Dumpster is a brand of skip, I think.

    #2
    Originally posted by RichardCranium View Post
    What is missing from the list?
    Never lick a chutney spoon.

    Comment


      #3
      Pretty close !!

      Comment


        #4
        Originally posted by oracleslave View Post
        Never lick a chutney spoon.
        No, no, no. Licking the chutney spoon is ok, just don't put it back in afterwards!
        Hang on - there is actually a place called Cheddar?? - cailin maith

        Any forum is a collection of assorted weirdos, cranks and pervs - Board Game Geek

        That will be a simply fab time to catch up for a beer. - Tay

        Have you ever seen somebody lick the chutney spoon in an Indian Restaurant and put it back ? - Cyberghoul

        Comment


          #5
          And another weekend dawns.
          Which means the locals at CyberTwunt's local will yet again have to sidle away from his desperate effort to make conversation.
          Hard Brexit now!
          #prayfornodeal

          Comment


            #6
            Originally posted by zeitghost
            Is annexing the Sudetenland and invading Poland in there anywhere?

            Comment


              #7
              Originally posted by RichardCranium View Post
              - reduce public expenditure to expand the economy;
              If the money saved by reducing this was returned to the taxpayer it could well help the economy, will never happen though.
              If you find this post offensive, please insert "Chan" before and "tho" after, then it should be OK.

              Sometimes I almost feel just like a human being - Elvis Costello

              Comment


                #8
                Originally posted by RichardCranium View Post
                My brain keeps trying to reject the messages for fear they may stick, but I think I have a few of Cyberman's views clear now.

                So, to sort out the country & economy, according to Cyberman we need to:

                - compulsory sterilisation for those on benefits;
                - sick, old criminals (e.g. Ronnie Biggs) should be automatically released;
                - mentally ill cyber-snoopers should be extradited for cost-saving reasons;
                - only mad people will be allowed to go to Muslim countries;
                - armed Police need to be storming mosques sooner rather than later;
                - northerners brought up by northerners should not be permitted to vote;
                - whenever 'flu breaks out the borders should be closed;
                - reduce public expenditure to expand the economy;
                - consensus is bad for strong government and will not be sought;
                - eliminate TB by stopping immigration;
                - shut the borders anyway just in case.

                (I'm fairly sure "chuck out the darkies", "prevent inter-racial breeding" and "invest in eugenics research" should be in there too somewhere, but as I said, my brain refuses to hold some concepts. And I only went back about five days to form the list above.)

                What is missing from the list?
                Or what is the odd one out in the list?

                I can't get my head round the idea that Cybertory proposes to *release* criminals, even if sick and old. Obviously he has a sentimental streak.
                Work in the public sector? Read the IR35 FAQ here

                Comment


                  #9
                  Originally posted by OwlHoot View Post
                  I can't get my head round the idea that Cybertory proposes to *release* criminals, even if sick and old. Obviously he has a mental streak.
                  Fixed that for you.
                  My all-time favourite Dilbert cartoon, this is: BTW, a Dumpster is a brand of skip, I think.

                  Comment


                    #10
                    Originally posted by RichardCranium View Post
                    Fixed that for you.
                    Cybermentalist.

                    Got a certain ring to it ...
                    Hang on - there is actually a place called Cheddar?? - cailin maith

                    Any forum is a collection of assorted weirdos, cranks and pervs - Board Game Geek

                    That will be a simply fab time to catch up for a beer. - Tay

                    Have you ever seen somebody lick the chutney spoon in an Indian Restaurant and put it back ? - Cyberghoul

                    Comment

                    Working...
                    X