Bullying

[Dundeegeorge]

'Phone in on radio this morning about bullying.
Is it the fault of the bully's parents?
Govermint are looking at fining parents of bullies and even sending them to parenting classes.
Opinions, comments, diatribes, off-topic discussions, whatever.

[wendigo100]

'Phone in on radio this morning about bullying.
Is it the fault of the bully's parents?
Govermint are looking at fining parents of bullies and even sending them to parenting classes.
Opinions, comments, diatribes, off-topic discussions, whatever.

Some parents definitely bring up kids in a tribal chav way, where being "top dog" is the priority. Fining them might focus their minds, but:

1. Not all parents of bullies are like that.

2. When fines are involved you've got to have hard evidence, which isn't easy. I heard a bit of that show, and there was a parent of a victim saying that the teacher turned a blind eye when his daughter was beaten up.

[Bagpuss]

From my experience, most bullies come from broken homes/single families/chav backgrounds. Quiet often they are subjected to violence/abuse from an early age. The act in the way they have been shown i.e. use your fists or shout to get your own way. Of course not all bullies are like this, but most I have come accross are. Usually their backgrounds are very sad. This campaign seems to focus on "all bullies are intrinsicly bad" , I don't think that is the case. When the parents don't give a flying feck what can you do?

[Dundeegeorge]

Well interestingly

From my experience, most bullies come from broken homes/single families/chav backgrounds. Quiet often they are subjected to violence/abuse from an early age. The act in the way they have been shown i.e. use your fists or shout to get your own way. Of course not all bullies are like this, but most I have come accross are. Usually their backgrounds are very sad. This campaign seems to focus on "all bullies are intrinsicly bad" , I don't think that is the case. When the parents don't give a flying feck what can you do?

You may recall all the hand-wringing a while ago about truanting, where some parents were jailed/fined. Those parents claimed that they had no control over their children and couldn't make them go to school. Guess what happened when parents were jailed and fined. It seems (I don't have figures) that truancy rates dropped (not just for the parents concerned but for others in their schools/districts). Who'd a thought? Hold people responsible for their offspring (in a tangible way) and they become responsible.
The liberals must be wetting themselves!

[hyperD]

I heard the bullying saga on the radio yesterday on LBC. One example that sprung to mind was a bully getting his just desserts when his long term victim broke the bully's nose and the bully's parents came to school with their solicitors. It turned out that little Johnny from nice middleclass parents was a constant offender and the school had built up a large dossier on said miscreant's offences. Needless to say, the solictors were sent back to their respective lairs and the parents went away, tails between legs proclaiming that they hadn't a clue as Johnny was so sweet and polite in front of them.

Moral of the story: this behaviour transcends classes - it is based upon the amount of mutual involvement and cooperation between the parents, child and schools and defining the bounds and ownership of responsibility and decent behaviour.

[zathras]

'Phone in on radio this morning about bullying.
Is it the fault of the bully's parents?
Govermint are looking at fining parents of bullies and even sending them to parenting classes.
Opinions, comments, diatribes, off-topic discussions, whatever.

Having been bullied for much of my time in School I'd say most bullies are cowards. It is to cover up their own problems. It's why when you thump most bullies they stop. They need a target cowed so they don't feel like the cowards they are.

PS I did thump one of the bullies and was no longer a target. Just wished I'd done it 6 years previously.

[Dundeegeorge]

Yes that's very helpful

Having been bullied for much of my time in School I'd say most bullies are cowards. It is to cover up their own problems. It's why when you thump most bullies they stop. They need a target cowed so they don't feel like the cowards they are.

PS I did thump one of the bullies and was no longer a target. Just wished I'd done it 6 years previously.

If you can do it.
Bit of a bummer for the children who can't though.
And remember it's often the case that a group of children pick on other children, are you suggesting that your child should receive a mass kicking for fighting back (as an aside. you may find that kids who do fight back are held up as the offender, life, eh!).

[MrsGoof]

Often teachers are not capeable of dealing with such situations, so often take the easy route of prenteding it didn't happen, or in my case punnishing the easy one.

I too was bullied at school, one day I fought back against 3 of them,I broke 1 guys arm accidently.

I was the one who got into trouble at school for defending myself against 3 bullies. The police got involved and their view was good on ya lad, as these guys also were well known by the police.

The school couldn't have cared less, but these guys didn't bother me again.

[Dundeegeorge]

And again that's Ok for you

Often teachers are not capeable of dealing with such situations, so often take the easy route of prenteding it didn't happen, or in my case punnishing the easy one.

I too was bullied at school, one day I fought back against 3 of them,I broke 1 guys arm accidently.

I was the one who got into trouble at school for defending myself against 3 bullies. The police got involved and their view was good on ya lad, as these guys also were well known by the police.

The school couldn't have cared less, but these guys didn't bother me again.

But a bit of a bummer for the handful of kids who commit suicide each year, who don't get the exam results they should, who have a miserable childhood.
And I'm assuming you weren't slashed with a pencil-sharpener blade, didn't have your face gouged by scissors, weren't stabbed in the heart for no reason.
Your point about teachers is very true, and while I do think that they should be more aware of what's happening in their school, it's not the teacher's responsibility really, is it. Or is it?

[hyperD]

I got bullied at school briefly by one big guy who picked on me because I didn't appear to pose too much of a threat. He was always hanging around the older guys.

Well he pushed me just a little bit too much and I lashed out with a right hander, punched him straight in the eye and a stunned classroom saw him literally fly over a desk.

Needless to say he and anyone else never bothered me again. The shiner he had was amazing and the great thing is, he couldn't face anyone again including his older "mates" knowing that he had been taken out by "a wimp".

Never bothered anyone again after that and disappeared into mediocrity.

A much better approach than all this PC bollox of Diversity Relationship Tsars, role playing and think tanks.

Bullies are cowards and once you attack them or make them look foolish in front of peers, they always disappear.