My Eyes

[EternalOptimist]

When I was a youngster, my eyes were situated on the sides of my head, like a guppy.
This was excellent, because it gave me good all-round vision, making it very difficult for bullies or other ne-er do wells to sneak up on me and attack me. I could spot danger from nearly 360 degrees.

But as I have gotten older (and more bulky) I have noticed that my head is getting fatter. This has led to my eyes getting closer together, therefore making me more vulnerable from the rear.
On the plus side, I now look more like a focussed predator with stereo vision, but I cant help feeling that someday soon, the burglars will notice my weak spot and take advantage.

[gingerjedi]

This is a toughy... Quetzalcoatl?

[OwlHoot]

When I was a youngster, my eyes were situated on the sides of my head, like a guppy.
This was excellent, because it gave me good all-round vision, making it very difficult for bullies or other ne-er do wells to sneak up on me and attack me. I could spot danger from nearly 360 degrees.

But as I have gotten older (and more bulky) I have noticed that my head is getting fatter. This has led to my eyes getting closer together, therefore making me more vulnerable from the rear.
On the plus side, I now look more like a focussed predator with stereo vision, but I cant help feeling that someday soon, the burglars will notice my weak spot and take advantage.

If your eyes are also slowly moving across your face you might want to spend less time lying on the sea bed.

HTH

[RichardCranium]

On the plus side, I now look more like a ripe long pig with tasty meaty chunks,

FTFY