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I feel a bit sick

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    I feel a bit sick

    I nicked some of the missus sweeties off the kitchen table last night, raisins in white chocolate in a half empty bag. They tasted a bit funny, but what the heck. A few hours later she comments on how clever the cats are, managing to get the cat treats out of the bag and scoff them, even though they werent so keen earlier on.

    Then I watched Brewster-Roustabout cleaning her bum hole with her little pink darting tongue. Now listen to this - cats are CARNIVORES, right ? well this little b@stard jumped onto the kitchen table and started to lick the purple grapes. MY purple grapes.

    I feel a bit sick



    (\__/)
    (>'.'<)
    ("")("") Born to Drink. Forced to Work

    #2
    ǝןqqıʍ

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      #3
      Originally posted by EternalOptimist View Post
      Now listen to this - cats are CARNIVORES, right ? well this little b@stard jumped onto the kitchen table and started to lick the purple grapes. MY purple grapes.
      Piles eh? You should get them sorted, they will only get worse.
      While you're waiting, read the free novel we sent you. It's a Spanish story about a guy named 'Manual.'

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        #4
        Originally posted by EternalOptimist View Post
        Then I watched Brewster-Roustabout cleaning her bum hole with her little pink darting tongue.

        Now listen to this - cats are CARNIVORES, right ? well this little b@stard jumped onto the kitchen table and started to lick the purple grapes. MY purple grapes.

        I feel a bit sick



        They like yeast so that's probably why they licked your grapes!

        Failing that it was to get their own back for you pinching their treats!

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          #5
          Originally posted by Churchill View Post
          They like yeast so that's probably why they licked your grapes!

          Failing that it was to get their own back for you pinching their treats!
          You just gave me a stunning idea. Not being a contortionist, I cant manage to lick my own bum, then their cat-treats, but I think the missus might go for it. Might cost me a handbag though




          (\__/)
          (>'.'<)
          ("")("") Born to Drink. Forced to Work

          Comment


            #6
            Originally posted by EternalOptimist View Post
            You just gave me a stunning idea. Not being a contortionist, I cant manage to lick my own bum, then their cat-treats, but I think the missus might go for it. Might cost me a handbag though




            Rather than using your tongue to make the transfer, why not try a finger?
            While you're waiting, read the free novel we sent you. It's a Spanish story about a guy named 'Manual.'

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              #7
              Originally posted by EternalOptimist View Post
              You just gave me a stunning idea. Not being a contortionist, I cant manage to lick my own bum, then their cat-treats, but I think the missus might go for it. Might cost me a handbag though




              Smear Marmite round your ringpiece - the missus might not like marmite but the cats will.

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                #8
                or possibly just some toilet roll, go for the ones with basalm to make it feel nicer
                The proud owner of 125 Xeno Geek Points

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                  #9
                  Originally posted by Churchill View Post
                  Smear Marmite round your ringpiece - the missus might not like marmite but the cats will.
                  they wont go near it, not after what happened last time





                  (\__/)
                  (>'.'<)
                  ("")("") Born to Drink. Forced to Work

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                    #10
                    Originally posted by chef View Post
                    or possibly just some toilet roll, go for the ones with balsamic to make it taste nicer
                    FTFY!

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