I finally got home (yesterday).....
They had "laid on" a Flipping 767 in short haul configuration... cos thats several more seats to cram in "rescued" Volcano victims..... (which is OK in that sense ie getting people home)
but a small post-it on the checkin counter said "limited entertainment".... thats the physical checkin counter not the Online checkin!).....
So (because I didn't know before I packed) I had put all my paper backs in my hold luggage.... cos I normally have about 20 films to choose from.......
So when I got on the flight I discover
a) Short Haul config
b) 12" TV screens every 10 yards in the ailes (rather than individual seat back ones)......
then (to twist the knife) they had "over sold" ie They had too many people for the seats.....
So they asked for volunteers to get off.... Fully expensed Hotel stay, £400 compo and upgrade on next flight out (Wed)......
<Drewster thinks> No on your 'kin life - you will need to beat me unconsious to get me out of this seat!!!!
So 3 people put their hands up...... get off the plane and............. we wait.......
about 20 mins later "The Three" get back on the plane - They can't stay cos they have the wrong type of visa (single visit and already stamped for exit)......
any other volunteers???
<Drewster grips seats even tighter>
In the end they shove the poor volunteers in the "Crew Jump Seats"... an off we jolly well go...... 70 mins late......
Once airborne.... we discover how "limited" the entertainment actually is......... 2 audio channels......
1) BA World - a sort of in house talk show!! (Imagine the JRoss show with non-entities..... actually just imagine the JRoss show with no pictures.... )
2) Some "Country" show..... They were playing "Coward of the County".... so I switched it off instantly.
Ho Hum... So thats almost 7 hours to kill with no entertainment....... great...
<Drewster thought> hang on I've got my IPod....... dig out of PC bag.... batteries flat as the proverbial.... Tulip!!
<Drewster thought> Oh 'kin Tulip.... If only I had transferred my 'kin ITunes onto the Laptop when I had all those hours sitting in my hotel........
<Drewster thought> Oh well the batteries are almost out on the laptop anyway.... and cos this is a tulip short haul plane there are no power sockets......
Ahhh Here comes the Stewardess.... Vodka and Coke = ReeeSult!......
Bit later - another drink Sir? <Yeees Get in there!!!!> Sorry we have run out of Coke! <
>
Eventually (what seemed like days later) we get to Heathrow.....
A queue about 4 miles long for Passport....... Luggage still not through....... Ah here it comes.... Grab bag and I'm off......... Green Channel.... 'Scuse me Sir! Would you mind stepping over here? < You have got to be pulling my 'kin plonker!!!!>......
Customs Grunt: Where have you flown from today Sir?....
Drewster: Jeddah... a week late.....
CG: Oh! Thank you sir.... just carry on sir.....
D: <thought> At 'kin last something not Tulip shaped........
D: Cheers mate.....
Now where is "Joe the Taxi"...... Ah great.... there he is.....
Jumps in Cab and we're off...... as far as the M25 when some TulipHead decides to try to get his car into the car in front via the boot.... so everything stops for a while..... then once its moving again we are into "Rush Hour" so stop start, crawl, stop etc......
Eventually get home very distinctly not a Happy Drewster..............
Oh well - Flight back on Friday... Whats the worst that could happen???
They had "laid on" a Flipping 767 in short haul configuration... cos thats several more seats to cram in "rescued" Volcano victims..... (which is OK in that sense ie getting people home)
but a small post-it on the checkin counter said "limited entertainment".... thats the physical checkin counter not the Online checkin!).....
So (because I didn't know before I packed) I had put all my paper backs in my hold luggage.... cos I normally have about 20 films to choose from.......
So when I got on the flight I discover
a) Short Haul config
b) 12" TV screens every 10 yards in the ailes (rather than individual seat back ones)......
then (to twist the knife) they had "over sold" ie They had too many people for the seats.....
So they asked for volunteers to get off.... Fully expensed Hotel stay, £400 compo and upgrade on next flight out (Wed)......
<Drewster thinks> No on your 'kin life - you will need to beat me unconsious to get me out of this seat!!!!
So 3 people put their hands up...... get off the plane and............. we wait.......
about 20 mins later "The Three" get back on the plane - They can't stay cos they have the wrong type of visa (single visit and already stamped for exit)......
any other volunteers???
<Drewster grips seats even tighter>
In the end they shove the poor volunteers in the "Crew Jump Seats"... an off we jolly well go...... 70 mins late......
Once airborne.... we discover how "limited" the entertainment actually is......... 2 audio channels......
1) BA World - a sort of in house talk show!! (Imagine the JRoss show with non-entities..... actually just imagine the JRoss show with no pictures.... )
2) Some "Country" show..... They were playing "Coward of the County".... so I switched it off instantly.
Ho Hum... So thats almost 7 hours to kill with no entertainment....... great...
<Drewster thought> hang on I've got my IPod....... dig out of PC bag.... batteries flat as the proverbial.... Tulip!!
<Drewster thought> Oh 'kin Tulip.... If only I had transferred my 'kin ITunes onto the Laptop when I had all those hours sitting in my hotel........
<Drewster thought> Oh well the batteries are almost out on the laptop anyway.... and cos this is a tulip short haul plane there are no power sockets......
Ahhh Here comes the Stewardess.... Vodka and Coke = ReeeSult!......
Bit later - another drink Sir? <Yeees Get in there!!!!> Sorry we have run out of Coke! <
>Eventually (what seemed like days later) we get to Heathrow.....
A queue about 4 miles long for Passport....... Luggage still not through....... Ah here it comes.... Grab bag and I'm off......... Green Channel.... 'Scuse me Sir! Would you mind stepping over here? <
You have got to be pulling my 'kin plonker!!!!>...... Customs Grunt: Where have you flown from today Sir?....
Drewster: Jeddah... a week late.....
CG: Oh! Thank you sir.... just carry on sir.....
D: <thought> At 'kin last something not Tulip shaped........
D: Cheers mate.....
Now where is "Joe the Taxi"...... Ah great.... there he is.....
Jumps in Cab and we're off...... as far as the M25 when some TulipHead decides to try to get his car into the car in front via the boot.... so everything stops for a while..... then once its moving again we are into "Rush Hour" so stop start, crawl, stop etc......
Eventually get home very distinctly not a Happy Drewster..............
Oh well - Flight back on Friday... Whats the worst that could happen???
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