• Visitors can check out the Forum FAQ by clicking this link. You have to register before you can post: click the REGISTER link above to proceed. To start viewing messages, select the forum that you want to visit from the selection below. View our Forum Privacy Policy.
  • Want to receive the latest contracting news and advice straight to your inbox? Sign up to the ContractorUK newsletter here. Every sign up will also be entered into a draw to WIN £100 Amazon vouchers!

AlfredJPruffock Godlike

Collapse
X
  •  
  • Filter
  • Time
  • Show
Clear All
new posts

    AlfredJPruffock Godlike




    Congrats





    Custom title suggestions please
    Fiscal nomad it's legal.

    #2
    That calls for a poem. Oh, and Poetlike would suit.

    Meditations: Dario Fo's discovery that God is the Supreme Head of the Italian State Railway

    God, once had a moustache, double breasted jacket
    Woollen turtleneck and held me on skis in Abruzzi

    God, once was a second grade teacher, signorina Puccessi, teaching
    Petrarch, Virgil, Ovid, Boccaccio, Dante, Grazia Deledda, , to mules

    God, once was whoever had 10,000 lire, the bomba,
    dared to show it, to spend the whole amount on drinks

    God, once was the captain of an ocean liner, Vesuvius
    Crossing the Atlantic to Ellis island, with one push from Naples

    God, once played centerfield in pinstripes, wore number 7
    drank a lot, hit home runs, won world series, a good friend

    God, once was a girl's eyes, her mouth, her right breast,
    then her left and sometimes the void between her legs

    God, once was the head of the New York Stock Exchange
    and quit over a salary dispute, to save money on taxes

    God, once wore silver and black, became very popular,
    other than in K.C., throwing long bombs to Cliff Branch

    God, once was the creator of all things, except Darwinism,
    Communism, all isms etc, but now rarely makes even a miracle

    God, once fell terribly in love, lost, banished everyone to hell
    became stone deaf to all pleas, while watching TV in heaven

    God, once went back to Italy, became a sanitation worker
    called a strike, filled Rome with garbage, till money was paid

    God, once dressed as a woman, liked it so much,
    he became a she and took a walk on the wild side

    God, once wore a red fedora, played Stanley on Broadway
    and went around shaking up molecules with black jazzmen

    God, once went back to New York City, shot all the petty thieves,
    wannabees and junkies and gave the credit to the politicians

    God, once punished his angels, making them Sioux, Aztecs,
    Blackfeet, Incas, slaves, Jews and had Europeans murder them

    God, once loved the world so much he gave it his only begotten son,
    who became president of the United States, for eight years

    God, doesn't ski now
    God, doesn't play baseball or football, either
    God is retired in Maine,
    God sleeps on the couch
    God could use a shave
    God goes to the refrigerator to get a beer
    God lies on the floor and watches TV
    God could use a bath
    God has an answer for every question
    God has no books, no music, no dvds
    No family
    God, does still go around shaking up molecules
    Tho` wearing glasses now

    Comment


      #3
      Aye Arp


      You are too kind - such words are so foreign to my ears nowadays - and for a change - I am lost for words.

      So enough of moi - instead ; dedicated to all of my fellow CUK readers - a few words from the immortal Bard Mr Robert Burns ...



      Here's a bottle and an honest friend!

      What would ye wish for mair, man?

      Who kens, before his life may end,
      What his share may be o' care, man?

      Then catch the moments as they fly,

      And use them as ye ought, man:

      Believe me, happiness is shy,
      And comes not aye when sought, man.

      Comment


        #4
        ajp

        god is a concept
        by which we measure
        our pain
        i'll say it again
        god is a concept
        by which we measure
        our pain

        i don't believe in magic
        i don't believe in i-ching
        i don't believe in bible
        i don't believe in tarot
        i don't believe in hitler
        i don't believe in jesus
        i don't believe in kennedy
        i don't believe in buddha
        i don't believe in mantra
        i don't believe in gita
        i don't believe in yoga
        i don't believe in kings
        i don't believe in elvis
        i don't believe in zimmerman
        i don't believe in beatles
        i just believe in me
        yoko and me
        and that's reality

        the dream is over
        what can i say?
        the dream is over
        yesterday
        i was the dreamweaver
        but now i'm reborn
        i was the walrus
        but now i'm john
        and so dear friends
        you'll just have to carry on
        the dream is over

        Comment


          #5
          AJP - BardLike

          Comment


            #6
            Originally posted by SupremeSpod View Post
            AJP - BardLike
            Seconded
            +50 Xeno Geek Points
            Come back Toolpusher, scotspine, Voodooflux. Pogle
            As for the rest of you - DILLIGAF

            Purveyor of fine quality smut since 2005

            CUK Olympic University Challenge Champions 2010/2012

            Comment


              #7
              I usually wait for the poster to say they are happy with it but this just fits perfectly. Alfred, if you want it changing just let me know. I can't check all posts so PM me so it doesn't get lost.

              Alfred J Pruffock
              your poems lighten dark days
              winter warmth to you

              Comment


                #8
                Originally posted by DS23 View Post
                ajp

                god is a concept
                by which we measure
                our pain
                i'll say it again
                god is a concept
                by which we measure
                our pain

                i don't believe in magic
                i don't believe in i-ching
                i don't believe in bible
                i don't believe in tarot
                i don't believe in hitler
                i don't believe in jesus
                i don't believe in kennedy
                i don't believe in buddha
                i don't believe in mantra
                i don't believe in gita
                i don't believe in yoga
                i don't believe in kings
                i don't believe in elvis
                i don't believe in zimmerman
                i don't believe in beatles
                i just believe in me
                yoko and me
                and that's reality

                the dream is over
                what can i say?
                the dream is over
                yesterday
                i was the dreamweaver
                but now i'm reborn
                i was the walrus
                but now i'm john
                and so dear friends
                you'll just have to carry on
                the dream is over

                The very odd thing is that I was thinking of the above song just yesterday....

                Just Fancy That !

                Comment


                  #9
                  Bard like - brilliant
                  (\__/)
                  (>'.'<)
                  ("")("") Born to Drink. Forced to Work

                  Comment


                    #10
                    Brilliant! Well done Mr BardLike!
                    If you think my attitude stinks, you should smell my fingers.

                    Comment

                    Working...
                    X