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View Full Version : Wilmslow has ended



ChimpMaster
18th February 2011, 15:44
As a sockpuppet I feel his time has come, he must be expired now. His posts are repetitive, boring and whimsical. There is joy no more in reading his posts.

Wilmslow's owner has done well to get the sockie to last so long. And in many instances I too have found the posts to be intriguing, in a Daily Mail kind of way.

But alas no more...
Wilmslow,
You know the score,
Let it go.
It's the end of the show.
As above,
So below.

AtW
18th February 2011, 15:47
Wilmslow == spriteboy.

cailin maith
18th February 2011, 15:48
Even though no one believes us,(by us I mean, us who have met him) he is actually real and I can unfortunatly imagine him getting into all these situations :frown

MarillionFan
18th February 2011, 15:49
In Wilmslows 'other life', he's a 6'8 ex-marine. :eyes

ChimpMaster
18th February 2011, 15:50
Even though no one believes us,(by us I mean, us who have met him) he is actually real and I can unfortunatly imagine him getting into all these situations :frown

It's even sadder if he is real. He must still be expired.

cailin maith
18th February 2011, 15:50
In Wilmslows 'other life', he's a 6'8 ex-marine. :eyes

Nah, he's on his way home. No time for CUK today.

AtW
18th February 2011, 15:52
Even though no one believes us,(by us I mean, us who have met him) he is actually real and I can unfortunatly imagine him getting into all these situations :frown

What proof did he offer that he is indeed person who posts under "Wilmslow" nickname on here? :eyes

TykeMerc
18th February 2011, 15:56
What proof did he offer that he is indeed person who posts under "Wilmslow" nickname on here? :eyes

Or for that matter if the Wilmslow ID is the only one used?

Churchill
18th February 2011, 15:57
In Wilmslows 'other life', he's a 6'8 ex-marine. :eyes

Hello dickhead. Been playing nice have you?

cailin maith
18th February 2011, 16:00
What proof did he offer that he is indeed person who posts under "Wilmslow" nickname on here? :eyes

Trust me, he didn't need any :ohwell

AtW
18th February 2011, 16:06
Or for that matter if the Wilmslow ID is the only one used?

I reckon it's you who is the puppet master - you always protest too much about sockies :eyes

TheFaQQer
18th February 2011, 16:12
What proof did he offer that he is indeed person who posts under "Wilmslow" nickname on here? :eyes

Chuchill shouted "Wilmslooooooooow" and he responded.

What other proof could you need? :eyes

amcdonald
18th February 2011, 16:12
Even though no one believes us,(by us I mean, us who have met him) he is actually real and I can unfortunatly imagine him getting into all these situations :frown

How do you know he's for real, has he pinched your bum ?

MaryPoppins
18th February 2011, 16:13
It's even sadder if he is real. He must still be expired.

:laugh

AtW
18th February 2011, 16:15
Chuchill shouted "Wilmslooooooooow" and he responded. What other proof could you need? :eyes

FFS, it's a sad wee place near Manchester - every second person there would respond to that shout!

That person, whoever he is (could be the real puppet master) just got free beers off you suckers.

cailin maith
18th February 2011, 16:20
Chuchill shouted "Wilmslooooooooow" and he responded.

What other proof could you need? :eyes

he shouted it because the fella actually looked like we'd imagine Wilmslow did.


How do you know he's for real, has he pinched your bum ?

No, thank God, I've have kicked him in the nuts.

MarillionFan
18th February 2011, 16:20
Nah, he's on his way home. No time for CUK today.

Get your stories straight.

Churchy is driving home and can't be Wilmslow.

Wilmslow is posting


Hello dickhead. Been playing nice have you?

Who's the dickhead now hey Churchy?:eyes

(and no replying still you!)

AtW
18th February 2011, 16:21
the fella actually looked like we'd imagine Wilmslow did.

Well, that's all the proof we needed!

:rolleyes:

I reckon it was EO. Pretty sure in fact - he lives in that area, got good imagination and pretty sick sense of humour at times.

cailin maith
18th February 2011, 16:23
Well, that's all the proof we needed!

:rolleyes:

I reckon it was EO. Pretty sure in fact - he lives in that area, got good imagination and pretty sick sense of humour at times.

EO was there too.

AtW
18th February 2011, 16:24
EO was there too.

Thank you for making my argument stronger...

GreenLabel
18th February 2011, 16:25
What proof did he offer that he is indeed person who posts under "Wilmslow" nickname on here? :eyes


Trust me, he didn't need any :ohwell

Meeting him must've been a deeply disturbing experience.

cailin maith
18th February 2011, 16:25
Thank you for making my argument stronger...

I haven't :confused:

2 Separate people - EO & Wilmslow.

Actually you know - I dont' give a shit of ye believe me or not :ind

MaryPoppins
18th February 2011, 16:26
Meeting him must've been a deeply disturbing experience.

I've seen the evidence and I think that it was.

GreenLabel
18th February 2011, 16:26
EO was there too.

Christ, it gets worse.

cailin maith
18th February 2011, 16:26
Meeting him must've been a deeply disturbing experience.

Not disturbing exactly :laugh

In all honesty, I think his heart is in the right place, he's just a bit akward.

AtW
18th February 2011, 16:28
2 Separate people - EO & Wilmslow.

Christ, you can be so naive at times :eyes

cailin maith
18th February 2011, 16:30
Christ, you can be so naive at times :eyes

Oh, piss off :spank:

GreenLabel
18th February 2011, 16:37
...he's just a bit akward.

In other news, the Pope is a tad religious, a kick in the nuts is mildly uncomfortable, and SuitYou is ever-so-slightly irritating.

cailin maith
18th February 2011, 16:39
In other news, the Pope is a tad religious, a kick in the nuts is mildly uncomfortable, and SuitYou is ever-so-slightly irritating.

:rollin::rollin: Very good point!!

AtW
18th February 2011, 16:41
Oh, piss off :spank:

:eek

TimberWolf
18th February 2011, 16:45
EO was there too.

That's a revelation, another Wilmslow sockmaster. That's at least 4 now.

Marypoppins (its creator and primary narrator), pogle, Churchill (grudgingly) and now it appears EO has joined the Wilmslow fold.

At this rate you will all be posting under Wilmslow eventually.

MaryPoppins
18th February 2011, 16:50
That's a revelation, another Wilmslow sockmaster. That's at least 4 now.

Marypoppins (its creator and primary narrator), pogle, Churchill (grudgingly) and now it appears EO has joined the Wilmslow fold.

At this rate you will all be posting under Wilmslow eventually.

How the 'eck did I get involved in all this, you cheeky bumhole?

AtW
18th February 2011, 16:51
That's a revelation, another Wilmslow sockmaster. That's at least 4 now.
Marypoppins (its creator and primary narrator), pogle, Churchill (grudgingly) and now it appears EO has joined the Wilmslow fold. At this rate you will all be posting under Wilmslow eventually.

IMHO the whole "meeting" makes sense only if they were all sockies and the real puppet master won't put his name to the list.

So my money would be on sasguru, maybe DimPrawn.

AtW
18th February 2011, 16:52
How the 'eck did I get involved in all this, you cheeky bumhole?

By association, after all some people say you are new Wilmslow's girlfriend...

TimberWolf
18th February 2011, 16:53
IMHO the whole "meeting" makes sense only if they were all sockies and the real puppet master won't put his name to the list.

So my money would be on sasguru, maybe DimPrawn.

Wilmslow's character is too clever for sasguru to produce and not clever enough for Dimprawn.

TimberWolf
18th February 2011, 16:55
How the 'eck did I get involved in all this, you cheeky bumhole?

Are you denying that you are Wilmslow?

MarillionFan
18th February 2011, 16:55
That's a revelation, another Wilmslow sockmaster. That's at least 4 now.

Marypoppins (its creator and primary narrator), pogle, Churchill (grudgingly) and now it appears EO has joined the Wilmslow fold.

At this rate you will all be posting under Wilmslow eventually.

Whereas 2010 was the Rise of the Bedwetters. It appears that 2011 is the Rise of the Sockies. Personally I blame lax moderating.:frown

AtW
18th February 2011, 16:59
Wilmslow's character is too clever for sasguru to produce and not clever enough for Dimprawn.

I concur. :smokin

MaryPoppins
18th February 2011, 17:01
Are you denying that you are Wilmslow?

Strenuously.

AtW
18th February 2011, 17:05
Ok, I admit that I am Wilmslow!

:eek

TimberWolf
18th February 2011, 17:07
Strenuously.

Well I've got my eye on you young lady :eyes

MaryPoppins
18th February 2011, 17:07
:eyes

Wassup? Oh, sorry:

— adj 1. requiring or involving the use of great energy or effort 2. characterized by great activity, effort, or endeavour

MaryPoppins
18th February 2011, 17:08
Well I've got my eye on you young lady :eyes

I know. I don't mind the Peeping Tom stuff; but only when the blinds are half mast, ok?

amcdonald
18th February 2011, 17:08
Are you denying that you are Wilmslow?

It's going to go all "I'm Spartacus" at this rate

TimberWolf
18th February 2011, 17:11
It's going to go all "I'm Spartacus" at this rate

Good idea. Let's crucify the lot of them.

AtW
18th February 2011, 17:19
I know. I don't mind the Peeping Tom stuff; but only when the blinds are half mast, ok?

Kinky.

Something would Wilmslow say.

MaryPoppins
18th February 2011, 17:21
Kinky.

Something would Wilmslow say.

Not really. Wilmslow is cheesy and full of half assed innuendo. I'm plain speaking and fairly disgusting.

I'm also not a sock master, clearly.

You, on the other hand....

TimberWolf
18th February 2011, 17:27
It's going to go all "I'm Spartacus" at this rate

Returning again to your analogy, as things stand the Spartans are all lined up and pointing at each other shouting "He is Spartacus" :laugh

They should have done that in the film.

AtW
18th February 2011, 17:35
You, on the other hand....

:eek:

You have me on your other hand thus claiming to be my puppet master? :eek

Zippy
18th February 2011, 17:38
I have it on good authority (and am in possession of some evidence) that Wilmslow is a real person.

MaryPoppins
18th February 2011, 17:41
I have it on good authority (and am in possession of some evidence) that Wilmslow is a real person.

You've got a lock of his hair too?

AtW
18th February 2011, 17:42
I have it on good authority (and am in possession of some evidence) that Wilmslow is a real person.

OMFG they got Zippy too!!! :eek:

Zippy
18th February 2011, 17:43
Well, of course he is real FFS, there are no AIs here - it's just the same real person also posts under many other logins.

There are no 'I's here either (present company and fembots included). Maybe he does post under other logins, but I have a fair idea of who that wouldn't be.

Zippy
18th February 2011, 17:44
You've got a lock of his hair too?

No, but I'm going after that next. :D

AtW
18th February 2011, 17:44
Maybe he does post under other logins, but I have a fair idea of who that wouldn't be.

So you do accept that he is probably posting under other logins, in which case what makes you think Wilmslow character is his MAIN character?

TimberWolf
18th February 2011, 17:49
OMFG they got Zippy too!!! :eek:

:rollin:

Zippy
18th February 2011, 17:54
So you do accept that he is probably posting under other logins, in which case what makes you think Wilmslow character is his MAIN character?

I didn't say that and I think accusing people of posting under different logins is a very risky strategem. Everyone is doing it (apart from me, obviously :D)

TimberWolf
18th February 2011, 17:56
I didn't say that and I think accusing people of posting under different logins is a very risky strategem. Everyone is doing it (apart from me, obviously :D)

I thought Admin said (a year or so ago when sock paranoia was high) that few people are doing this.

btw Shame on you Zippy

AtW
18th February 2011, 17:59
btw Shame on you Zippy

I thought Zippy was a nice attractive lady in a white dress, turns out she is that old bloke with a tash...

:grey

MarillionFan
18th February 2011, 18:01
I concur. Wilmslow is real.

http://www.retrobike.co.uk/forum/files/invasion_of_the_body_snatchers_78_444.jpg

TimberWolf
18th February 2011, 18:01
I thought Zippy was a nice attractive lady in a white dress, turns out she is that old bloke with a tash...

:grey

Where is his arm? :smokin

Zippy
18th February 2011, 18:02
I thought Admin said (a year or so ago when sock paranoia was high) that few people are doing this.

btw Shame on you Zippy


I thought Zippy was a nice attractive lady in a white dress, turns out she is that old bloke with a tash...

:grey

It's a fair cop :igmc:

ChimpMaster
18th February 2011, 18:27
Wow, I didn't realise people would be so emotive about Wil.

In any case, the point is one and the same.

I enjoyed Wilmslow's on the odd occassion. His ongoing battle with the neighbours, his laborious trundle through permie life, his reports of somewhat inconsistent bowel movements. Etc.

This sockie online life must be ended.

AtW
18th February 2011, 18:30
This sockie online life must be ended.

:spel

terminated

amcdonald
18th February 2011, 19:14
OMFG they got Zippy too!!! :eek:

Invasion of the Body Snatchers ?

AtW
18th February 2011, 19:17
Invasion of the Body Snatchers ?

Clowns from Space more like it, and yes by that I mean Wilmslow, sasguru, BrilloPad...

EternalOptimist
18th February 2011, 19:45
Well, that's all the proof we needed!

:rolleyes:

I reckon it was EO. Pretty sure in fact - he lives in that area, got good imagination and pretty sick sense of humour at times.

listen you manky muscovite.

i have met loads from here, one of whom claimed to be wilmsy. then me and the missus met him a second time.
I have no idea if he has other id's

who cares ??? only a sad sack, couchless, unclean Ukranian.

he may have been sasguru having a laugh, . who cares ??? only a stinky smelly Smolenskian.

maybe sasguru is wilmsy having a laugh, who cares ??? only a gurning Grozny-ite

so shut it , ball bag





:rolleyes:

AtW
18th February 2011, 20:16
i have met loads from here

Nice confession - now we know that EO regularly meets people from forum...

EternalOptimist
18th February 2011, 20:21
Nice confession - now we know that EO regularly meets people from forum...

listen you Ropey Rigan, i didn't say regularly


now get your levels of accuracy sorted, before I come round and sort you. ball bag




:rolleyes:

AtW
18th February 2011, 20:22
then me and the missus met him a second time.

:eek:

AtW
18th February 2011, 20:23
listen you Ropey Rigan, i didn't say regularly

You said "loads" - since meetings are pretty rare, then getting to know "loads" would require some regular attendance :smokin

EternalOptimist
18th February 2011, 20:23
:eek:

cm and spod and rc and tingles chaperoned

ChimpMaster
18th February 2011, 20:27
ATW=Marrymeman=Sadguru=Dikprawn

AtW
18th February 2011, 20:27
cm and spod and rc and tingles chaperoned

That's a rather poor witness list - for all we know they don't exist either...

AtW
18th February 2011, 20:28
ATW=MarillionFan=Sadguru=Dikprawn

I am Spartacus.

EternalOptimist
18th February 2011, 20:28
You said "loads" - since meetings are pretty rare, then getting to know "loads" would require some regular attendance :smokin

listen you dum dneprepretovoskian, in english, there are two propositions


I met loads once
I met one loads

i met loads. wilmsy twice


no wonder you are two stoopid to be given a couch licenese


:rolleyes:

MarillionFan
18th February 2011, 20:29
ATW=Marrymeman=Sadguru=Dikprawn

Piss off chimp, leave me out it. Popcorn anyone?

AtW
18th February 2011, 20:30
i met loads. wilmsy twice

So you admit that on at least two occasions you and the one who posts under nickname "Wilmslow" were present at the same location?

EternalOptimist
18th February 2011, 20:32
So you admit that on at least two occasions you and the one who posts under nickname "Wilmslow" were present at the same location?

yes , I was the handsome, lithe, mustachioed, full head of hair, muscely, well spoken scouser.
wilmsy was the pilates bloke




:rolleyes:

AtW
18th February 2011, 20:36
yes , I was the handsome, lithe, mustachioed, full head of hair, muscely, well spoken scouser. wilmsy was the pilates bloke

Ok, maybe he is not you after all. Or maybe he is you but from another time - like early years etc.

Anyway ze focus of investigation will now shift to other possible culpits...

EternalOptimist
18th February 2011, 20:39
Ok, maybe he is not you after all. Or maybe he is you but from another time - like early years etc.

Anyway ze focus of investigation will now shift to other possible culpits...

if you ever decide to move into farming, and you need two acres
let me know



:rolleyes:

TimberWolf
18th February 2011, 20:40
cm and spod and rc and tingles chaperoned

So you're saying Richard Cranium also witnessed the Wilmslow?

AtW
18th February 2011, 20:40
if you ever decide to move into farming, and you need two acres
let me know

Is that in Farmville? :eyes

AtW
18th February 2011, 20:43
So you're saying Richard Cranium also witnessed the Wilmslow?

No, what he says is basically anyone from that list can be Wilmslow, apart from him - I guess he narrowed down list somewhat as we can probably assume Wilmslow ain't got n***s :eyes

TimberWolf
18th February 2011, 20:50
No, what he says is basically anyone from that list can be Wilmslow, apart from him - I guess he narrowed down list somewhat as we can probably assume Wilmslow ain't got n***s :eyes

It's narrowed down if they all haven't got n**ks. But there may be others in the Wilmslow gang that EO didn't mention, i.e. saying so and so chaperoned him doesn't preclude others from having been in attendance.

AtW
18th February 2011, 20:53
But there may be others in the Wilmslow gang that EO didn't mention, i.e. saying so and so chaperoned him doesn't preclude others from having been in attendance.

Ok, so next thing we need to check whether EO or whoever claimed to be EO met anyone ELSE who he did not name - if that's the case he was hiding vital evidence, that's like obstruction of CUK justice ...

amcdonald
18th February 2011, 20:55
So who's Keyser Söze ?

TimberWolf
18th February 2011, 20:57
Ok, so next thing we need to check whether EO or whoever claimed to be EO met anyone ELSE who he did not name - if that's the case he was hiding vital evidence, that's like obstruction of CUK justice ...

Okay, I think Richard Cranium (also a sockpuppet) needs to be brought in for questioning. EO is refusing to answer questions about other potential witnesses.

AtW
18th February 2011, 21:00
Okay, I think Richard Cranium (also a sockpuppet) needs to be brought in for questioning. EO is refusing to answer questions about other potential witnesses.

The truth might be so horrible that he chooses to cover it up :eyes

TimberWolf
18th February 2011, 21:01
The truth might be so horrible that he chooses to cover it up :eyes

Do you think the truth is out there? I have doubts.

AtW
18th February 2011, 21:03
Do you think the truth is out there? I have doubts.

I think we need to form an executive committee that will hunt down every sockie on here :eyes

AtW
18th February 2011, 21:06
I am off to pub, going to check if Wilmslow is there and buy him/her a pint. :wink

TimberWolf
18th February 2011, 21:07
I think we need to form an executive committee that will hunt down every sockie on here :eyes

Maybe it's time this (http://forums.contractoruk.com/general/52908-authenticated-people-cuk.html) was resurrected.

TimberWolf
18th February 2011, 21:11
I am off to pub, going to check if Wilmslow is there and buy him/her a pint. :wink

Take care you don't become one.

NickFitz
18th February 2011, 21:18
That's a rather poor witness list - for all we know they don't exist either...

I've met CM, Spod, and RC :p

EDIT: and lots of other people from here, of course :wave:

DaveB
18th February 2011, 21:37
I've met CM, Spod, and RC :p



WHS, but having met them I still wouldn't put it past them for it to be a wind up.

Even though Wilmslow did PM me yesterday :wave:

Zippy
18th February 2011, 21:48
A secretly taken photo from the last RLM......

http://theideagirlsays.files.wordpress.com/2010/09/tube-sock-puppets.jpg

That looks about right. I couldn't make it, unfortunately.

MarillionFan
18th February 2011, 22:12
A secretly taken photo from the last RLM......

http://theideagirlsays.files.wordpress.com/2010/09/tube-sock-puppets.jpg

Mmmm. I really needed a hair cut then didn't I?

Zippy
18th February 2011, 22:15
I think you were busy with George...... :eek:

http://www.canvas101.co.uk/bmz_cache/3/34274d719c6195076a701ddd7a4bf4dd.image.200x146.jpg

That's avatar material :smile

MaryPoppins
18th February 2011, 22:27
I didn't say that and I think accusing people of posting under different logins is a very risky strategem. Everyone is doing it (apart from me, obviously :D)

Me 'n all, but I think I'm going to start doing it