Landlords visit tomorrow!

[AtW]

First time ever in over 10 years of rending landlord expressed desire to check property "for insurance purposes"

[DimPrawn]

Tidy up the old pot noodles. Bin the tisssues. Take the curtains to the dry cleaners. Deflate Ample Annie and put her in the cupboard.

You'll be fine.

[minestrone]

[MarillionFan]

First time ever in over 10 years of rending landlord expressed desire to check property "for insurance purposes"

I'm not bloody surprised your landlord is coming over!

rend Verb /rend/
Synonyms:
verb: tear, rip, split, lacerate, rive, slit, cleave
noun: rent
rends 3rd person singular present; rent past tense; rending present participle; rent past participle
1.Tear (something) into two or more pieces
■snapping teeth that would rend human flesh to shreds
■the speculation and confusion that was rending the civilized world
2.Wrench (something) violently
■he rent the branch out of the tree
3.Cause great emotional pain to (a person or their heart)

[AtW]

Quick, needs some tactical ideas how to effectively shift visitors attention to what I want them to see - the best I can think of is that famous scene from Silence of the Labs, but it seems a tad too extreme for current situation

[amcdonald]

Quick hide flossy, the real doll and all your lesbian midget clown porn

[MarillionFan]

Quick, needs some tactical ideas how to effectively shift visitors attention to what I want them to see - the best I can think of is that famous scene from Silence of the Labs, but it seems a tad too extreme for current situation

Dark short curly hair, dodgy moustache, out of date clothes and mad staring eyes should be enough to distract him.

You shouldn't find it that difficult.

[norrahe]

Dark short curly hair, dodgy moustache, out of date clothes and mad staring eyes should be enough to distract him.

You shouldn't find it that difficult.

They'll probably be distracted by the dodgy sofa

[Zippy]

What do you need to hide AtW? Put all your crap in neat piles, or if all else fails hide it under the duvet.

[wobbegong]

What do you need to hide AtW? Put all your crap in neat piles, or if all else fails hide it under the duvet.

. . . and for the last time, Alexei, get those ****ing squirrels out of the bedroom.