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Quick question before I speak to my solicitor....

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    Quick question before I speak to my solicitor....

    I got divorced about 2 years ago and since then, I've been paying £700 a month to my ex as half of the mortgage on the house that she and my 11 year old daughter live in.

    Now, when my daugher was staying with me the other night, she mentioned that the ex's boyfriend was thinking about moving in with the ex. I don't have a problem with that, he's a decent bloke and my daughter seems to get on well with him.

    The question is, if he moves in, does my obligation to pay half of the mortgage automatically end? I have no objections whatsoever to paying towards keeping a roof over my ex and daughter's heads but not sure about housing the new boyfriend.

    Any thoughts or experiences of this amongst the CUKers?

    #2
    Originally posted by ilovehr View Post
    I got divorced about 2 years ago and since then, I've been paying £700 a month to my ex as half of the mortgage on the house that she and my 11 year old daughter live in.

    Now, when my daugher was staying with me the other night, she mentioned that the ex's boyfriend was thinking about moving in with the ex. I don't have a problem with that, he's a decent bloke and my daughter seems to get on well with him.

    The question is, if he moves in, does my obligation to pay half of the mortgage automatically end? I have no objections whatsoever to paying towards keeping a roof over my ex and daughter's heads but not sure about housing the new boyfriend.

    Any thoughts or experiences of this amongst the CUKers?
    You have to pay for the child till she is 18. Nothing to do with who lives with her or if she marries Bill Gates even. Dont shirk your responsibilities, it's your daughter FFS.

    Comment


      #3
      Originally posted by russell View Post
      You have to pay for the child till she is 18. Nothing to do with who lives with her or if she marries Bill Gates even. Dont shirk your responsibilities, it's your daughter FFS.
      Wouldn't put it quite as bluntly as above, but yeah, if they were to marry I think your "legal obligations" might change
      Originally posted by Stevie Wonder Boy
      I can't see any way to do it can you please advise?

      I want my account deleted and all of my information removed, I want to invoke my right to be forgotten.

      Comment


        #4
        You need to pay what the CSA advise, if your paying for the mortgage out of the goodness of your heart and not through any legal requirement then i would say you don't have to pay unless you want to.

        As long as your paying your legal requirement (which this may be part of) then anything above and beyond is up to you surely

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          #5
          Jesus Russel, you arrogant tw*t

          Do you actually know anything about my situation? I also pay £700 per month towards my daughter's welfare on top of the mortgage (so that's £1400 per month) which is due until she's 18. I also paid a lump sum of £10,000 from an inheritance last year. I didn't mention this in my post as I didn't think it was relevant to the question.

          I adore my daughter and she stays with me 2 or 3 nights per week on average. I get on well with the ex and her boyfriend.

          So get off your high horse and stop jumping to conclusions.

          I asked a simple and very specific question about the mortgage. Try reading the post......

          Comment


            #6
            Originally posted by ilovehr View Post
            Jesus Russel, you arrogant tw*t

            Do you actually know anything about my situation? I also pay £700 per month towards my daughter's welfare on top of the mortgage (so that's £1400 per month) which is due until she's 18. I also paid a lump sum of £10,000 from an inheritance last year. I didn't mention this in my post as I didn't think it was relevant to the question.

            I adore my daughter and she stays with me 2 or 3 nights per week on average. I get on well with the ex and her boyfriend.

            So get off your high horse and stop jumping to conclusions.

            I asked a simple and very specific question about the mortgage. Try reading the post......
            Im not sure how we were meant to give advice when you provided us with half the story. Makes sense now. Just do everything through csa then there can be no complaints on either side.

            Comment


              #7
              Originally posted by ilovehr View Post
              Jesus Russel, you arrogant tw*t

              Do you actually know anything about my situation? I also pay £700 per month towards my daughter's welfare on top of the mortgage (so that's £1400 per month) which is due until she's 18. I also paid a lump sum of £10,000 from an inheritance last year. I didn't mention this in my post as I didn't think it was relevant to the question.

              I adore my daughter and she stays with me 2 or 3 nights per week on average. I get on well with the ex and her boyfriend.

              So get off your high horse and stop jumping to conclusions.

              I asked a simple and very specific question about the mortgage. Try reading the post......
              No idea what the answer is, but best of luck, and well done for spotting our new resident twat.

              Comment


                #8
                Originally posted by russell View Post
                Im not sure how we were meant to give advice when you provided us with half the story. Makes sense now. Just do everything through csa then there can be no complaints on either side.
                Apology accepted.

                The CSA aren't involved and everything was sorted via a consent order which can be reviewed should the situation of either party change. Everything was very amicable and we agreed that I would pay half of the mortgage and money for my daughter's welfare.

                Imagine if their wasn't a child involved - presumably if my ex moved a boyfried in and I was still paying towards the mortgage, I could apply to the courts to have the consent order altered to not pay towards the mortgage or maybe encourage my ex to buy me out.

                My solicitor is a bit aggresive so I don't want to go straight to him as it would come accross as being a bit heavy handed with the ex if she got a lettter from him. I want things to stay amicable but wanted to get an idea of what my "rights" were when I have a chat with the ex.

                Comment


                  #9
                  You have an amount to pay, not an obligation to pay for anything in particular e.g. mortgage.
                  So don't separate the mortgage from the maintenance.

                  So you pay £1400 per month and if that's the value that https://www2.dwp.gov.uk/csa/v2/en/ca...aintenance.asp pops-out then great.

                  Just make sure you have records of any payments if not agreed via the CSA "just in case"
                  Anti-bedwetting advice

                  Comment


                    #10
                    just a thought, if your not paying it through any legal requirement and you just do it to look after them why not get some deal done through a solicitor whereby you will keep paying but at some point, (daughter reaches 18, they want to move house) you get your half back/they buy you out, you get good investment they keep a roof over their heads everyones happy

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