• Visitors can check out the Forum FAQ by clicking this link. You have to register before you can post: click the REGISTER link above to proceed. To start viewing messages, select the forum that you want to visit from the selection below. View our Forum Privacy Policy.
  • Want to receive the latest contracting news and advice straight to your inbox? Sign up to the ContractorUK newsletter here. Every sign up will also be entered into a draw to WIN £100 Amazon vouchers!

Charcoal underpants.

Collapse
X
  •  
  • Filter
  • Time
  • Show
Clear All
new posts

    Charcoal underpants.

    Had SY02's family round for dinner.
    A nice roast chicken dinner with stuffing, and brocolli.
    Then played Trivial Pursuit.

    They have just left after an entire evening of me constantly doing roast dinner farts. Relentless, at least two deep throaty ones every minute. The whole room is smog ridden, and they just crawled out as if their lives depended on it.

    The MIL made a passing comment as she left about getting charcoal underpants.

    And guess what? They actually exist.

    "Flatulence odour control products for those who care"



    Long wait until Christmas though. Perhaps father's day.
    Knock first as I might be balancing my chakras.

    #2
    KUATB

    Comment


      #3
      Originally posted by k2p2 View Post
      Definately going to use the buff muff.
      Knock first as I might be balancing my chakras.

      Comment


        #4
        Originally posted by suityou01 View Post
        Had SY02's family round for dinner.
        A nice roast chicken dinner with stuffing, and brocolli.
        Then played Trivial Pursuit.

        They have just left after an entire evening of me constantly doing roast dinner farts. Relentless, at least two deep throaty ones every minute. The whole room is smog ridden, and they just crawled out as if their lives depended on it.

        The MIL made a passing comment as she left about getting charcoal underpants.

        And guess what? They actually exist.

        "Flatulence odour control products for those who care"



        Long wait until Christmas though. Perhaps father's day.
        Bet your mother in law is as proud as mrs middelton, her daughter snagged such a class act.

        Comment


          #5
          Get a dog.
          Then you can enjoy the full aroma whilst being exhonerated of all blame

          I suggest a labrador. or maybe a hyena, at least a hyena will laugh whilst you are shouting at it




          (\__/)
          (>'.'<)
          ("")("") Born to Drink. Forced to Work

          Comment


            #6
            I didn't know roast dinners were a prime fuel for flatulence. Maybe you should see a doctor. Unless you had cabbage with it?
            Originally posted by MaryPoppins
            I'd still not breastfeed a nazi
            Originally posted by vetran
            Urine is quite nourishing

            Comment


              #7
              Originally posted by d000hg View Post
              I didn't know roast dinners were a prime fuel for flatulence. Maybe you should see a doctor. Unless you had cabbage with it?


              A few other factoids to stand you well in your passage into adulthood.

              Never force a tulip.
              Don't mix your drinks, particularly ouzo and red wine.
              When working away, women in hotel bars called Saffron want to be more than just friends.
              A red ring round your gentlemen is lipstick, whereas a green one may be gangreen.
              Did I mention never ever forcing a tulip?
              Avoid Kopi Luwak.
              Always be the first to get a round in.
              Burp the worm at least once a week.
              Treat anyone who's last name is that of a town or city with care.
              Anusol HC+ ointment is the best above all other similar products.
              Mankinis are also conversation starters, especially at barbeques.
              Popcorn can be deceptively binding in large quantities.
              Avoid anyone called Des like the plague.
              And never ever ever ever ever force a tulip.
              Knock first as I might be balancing my chakras.

              Comment


                #8
                I had lots of roast dinners and never had the problem you mention. Other foods, sure, but meat+potato+veg is pretty orthodox and balanced. Again... sounds like your bowels are too far into adulthood.
                Originally posted by MaryPoppins
                I'd still not breastfeed a nazi
                Originally posted by vetran
                Urine is quite nourishing

                Comment


                  #9
                  Originally posted by d000hg View Post

                  I had lots of roast dinners and never had the problem you mention. Other foods, sure, but meat+potato+veg is pretty orthodox and balanced. Again... sounds like your bowels are too far into adulthood.
                  Sprouts can be fairly trumpy.

                  But I suspect from the timing (meal, followed by trivial purSuities, followed by methane megatrumps) that SYs problems stem more from home brews consumed the previous day.
                  Work in the public sector? Read the IR35 FAQ here

                  Comment


                    #10
                    Originally posted by suityou01 View Post
                    Had SY02's family round for dinner.
                    A nice roast chicken dinner with stuffing, and brocolli.
                    There's your culprit. Brocolli. Another member of the Brassica family along with sprouts, cabbage and cauliflower.
                    "Being nice costs nothing and sometimes gets you extra bacon" - Pondlife.

                    Comment

                    Working...
                    X