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Suggestions for stupid things to put on a CV

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    Suggestions for stupid things to put on a CV

    If one was going to, you know, send utter cobblers to the more annoying agents.

    So far, my imaginary candidate has invented bananas and precipitated multiple Arab uprisings via social media.
    While you're waiting, read the free novel we sent you. It's a Spanish story about a guy named 'Manual.'

    #2
    I think he might have a PhD as well, something to do with post menopausal female sexuality.
    While you're waiting, read the free novel we sent you. It's a Spanish story about a guy named 'Manual.'

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      #3


      What the **** is gorp?
      While you're waiting, read the free novel we sent you. It's a Spanish story about a guy named 'Manual.'

      Comment


        #4
        At a client co back in 1999, there was a desktop support monkey (an FTC rather than a contractor), who was always up the arses of the other contractors for info on 'breaking in' to contracting.

        Without a word of a lie, this tit created a CV using VISIO of all things and at the bottom of it, he created a little footer which said 'This document was created using VISOI' and handed it round contractors asking them to pass it on to agents

        He was known as 'The vizoy boy' from then on.......twat
        When freedom comes along, don't PISH in the water supply.....

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          #5
          My house is worth over £1M and I have an eco-shed, an imaginary motorbike, and no mates.

          HTH

          sasguru

          “The period of the disintegration of the European Union has begun. And the first vessel to have departed is Britain”

          Comment


            #6
            Remember you have 15 years experience coding in C Hash.

            Could you have multiple gaps in the employment history where you went "travelling" around Pakistan?

            Could your hobbies include playing flight simulators and getting flying lessons?
            Knock first as I might be balancing my chakras.

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              #7
              Genuine CV I once read had a list of "interest" and included "going to the cinema, socialising with friends, walking and sheep". Yes, sheep.

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                #8
                How about "I spend most of my time posting crap on an internet forum at my client's expense!"

                Just saying like...

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                  #9
                  Originally posted by GillsMan View Post
                  Genuine CV I once read had a list of "interest" and included "going to the cinema, socialising with friends, walking and sheep". Yes, sheep.
                  He might be a Newzealander or Welsh?

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                    #10
                    Originally posted by rd409 View Post
                    He might be a Newzealander or Welsh?
                    Or he may be supporting the rare-breeds program. Or a twisted little pervert.

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