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A close shave

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    A close shave

    Got a gig starting on Monday, and the consultancy wanted me in for debriefing today. So I nipped down to town for a couple of hours. Last night was an unplanned boozy one, culminating in dial out pizza to soak it all up.

    This morning I was a little rough but not too bad. Got to St Pancras and felt ok. As I was walking through the concourse to the tube I started feeling rough. Symptoms were, cramps (below bridge level), nipsy twinges, nausea, light headedness, dizzy spells, fever, sweats, palpitations.

    Onwards towards the tube. Don't want to be late. Arrive at Victoria and have to walk along Grosvenor place (behind Maams house) to the consultancy. Now soaked with sweat, still dizzy and feeling sick.

    Don't want to be late now, must press on.

    Arrive in the foyer and sign in. The desk lady asked if I wanted a glass of water. No thanks. Fine take a seat. OK.

    Sitting there. Suddenly room really starts spinning, feel sick, really sick. OMFG I am going to blow chunks all over their lovely marbled foyer.

    I gets up. Erm excuse me where's the loo.

    Desk lady is on the phone and puts her hand up to indicate I have to wait.

    Suity is hopping from foot to foot. "Lady where's the loo!!!!"

    After some directions I burst in nearly knocking some poor innocent over as I barrel past into trap 3. Head over pan, retch, retch, retch. Nothing.

    Then a knock at the back door and I have to sit down quick as wave after wave of diahorrea explodes from me.

    Bit more retching.

    Then zip up, flush, washy washy hand hands.

    Look in the mirror. Pale as death, and still sweating. Feel dog rough.

    Then, game face on. Meet and greet with the PM. Big smile that meets the eyes, and press on.

    I'm glad I still haven't lost my go-to-work-even-with-ebola-ness after a couple of months on the bench.

    I wonder what they all made of this crazed sweaty balding overweight loon.

    A close shave in deed.
    Knock first as I might be balancing my chakras.

    #2
    good work Suity

    Milan.

    Comment


      #3
      You are EternalOptimist and I claim my 5 made up stories.
      What happens in General, stays in General.
      You know what they say about assumptions!

      Comment


        #4
        Originally posted by suityou01 View Post
        Got a gig starting on Monday, and the consultancy wanted me in for debriefing today. So I nipped down to town for a couple of hours. Last night was an unplanned boozy one, culminating in dial out pizza to soak it all up.

        This morning I was a little rough but not too bad. Got to St Pancras and felt ok. As I was walking through the concourse to the tube I started feeling rough. Symptoms were, cramps (below bridge level), nipsy twinges, nausea, light headedness, dizzy spells, fever, sweats, palpitations.

        Onwards towards the tube. Don't want to be late. Arrive at Victoria and have to walk along Grosvenor place (behind Maams house) to the consultancy. Now soaked with sweat, still dizzy and feeling sick.

        Don't want to be late now, must press on.

        Arrive in the foyer and sign in. The desk lady asked if I wanted a glass of water. No thanks. Fine take a seat. OK.

        Sitting there. Suddenly room really starts spinning, feel sick, really sick. OMFG I am going to blow chunks all over their lovely marbled foyer.

        I gets up. Erm excuse me where's the loo.

        Desk lady is on the phone and puts her hand up to indicate I have to wait.

        Suity is hopping from foot to foot. "Lady where's the loo!!!!"

        After some directions I burst in nearly knocking some poor innocent over as I barrel past into trap 3. Head over pan, retch, retch, retch. Nothing.

        Then a knock at the back door and I have to sit down quick as wave after wave of diahorrea explodes from me.

        Bit more retching.

        Then zip up, flush, washy washy hand hands.

        Look in the mirror. Pale as death, and still sweating. Feel dog rough.

        Then, game face on. Meet and greet with the PM. Big smile that meets the eyes, and press on.

        I'm glad I still haven't lost my go-to-work-even-with-ebola-ness after a couple of months on the bench.

        I wonder what they all made of this crazed sweaty balding overweight loon.

        A close shave in deed.


        still a contractor at heart - good to see that
        "Condoms should come with a free pack of earplugs."

        Comment


          #5
          Originally posted by zeitghost
          How's yer piles?


          I need to borrow SY02's compact mirror.
          Knock first as I might be balancing my chakras.

          Comment


            #6
            Originally posted by suityou01 View Post
            I wonder what they all made of this crazed sweaty balding overweight loon
            Probably thought a tech admin had applied for the role.
            Originally posted by MaryPoppins
            I'd still not breastfeed a nazi
            Originally posted by vetran
            Urine is quite nourishing

            Comment


              #7
              Sometimes the interviewer asks the receptionist for their impression of interviewees.

              "Well he seemed a bit nervous and agitated, and actually shouted at me! Oh and he had a strange walk, shuffling along with his hands behind his back, as if he was clutching his buttocks. Very strange guy if you ask me"

              Work in the public sector? Read the IR35 FAQ here

              Comment


                #8
                Originally posted by OwlHoot View Post
                Sometimes the interviewer asks the receptionist for their impression of interviewees.

                "Well he seemed a bit nervous and agitated, and actually shouted at me! Oh and he had a strange walk, shuffling along with his hands behind his back, as if he was clutching his buttocks. Very strange guy if you ask me"

                And their ubend now looks like the flight deck on the Ark Royal.
                Knock first as I might be balancing my chakras.

                Comment


                  #9
                  Originally posted by suityou01 View Post
                  I wonder what they all made of this crazed sweaty balding overweight loon.
                  They probably thought you'd taken a shine to the desk lady and had to crack one out in the bogs?

                  Seriously though, is there ever a month goes by that you dont have either a dose of man flu or the screaming tulips?

                  Comment


                    #10
                    Originally posted by Mr.Whippy View Post
                    They probably thought you'd taken a shine to the desk lady and had to crack one out in the bogs?

                    Seriously though, is there ever a month goes by that you dont have either a dose of man flu or the screaming tulips?
                    Just saying the same to MeJulie.
                    Knock first as I might be balancing my chakras.

                    Comment

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