So on Thursday I receive a letter an an old address that managed to find me because the wife was visiting someone who lives near the old address and bumped into a woman walking her dog etc etc (and that's not even made up!)
HMRC very kindly told me they'd already sent a debt to a collection agency and were about to send another if I didn't cough up. That's all the detail, no indication of what the debt was for or for when. And it was for a company that's been closed for nearly three years. Being a good citizen I called the "helpline" and promptly fell down the rabbit hole.
The debt helpline couldn't do anything apart from tell me the debt was for VAT returns from this year and I had to call the VAT helpline - which is only open office hours. I was first in the queue on Friday. They couldn't tell me anything and shunted me off to the de-registration helpline. Who helpfully shunted me back to the debt helpline.
Ah, but this time I got a bit further. This chappy revealed I had a brand new VAT number but couldn't/wouldn't say why or how it had been created. He said that because it was on the computer it was correct. HMRC never make mistakes and if I continue to ask questions he would hang up on me. He also tells me to file nil returns which would cancel the debt but not call off the debt collectors (?) and I could then apply to have the VAT registration cancelled. This idiot also told me the VAT35 confirmation of de-registration from VAT didn't exist and I've just made it up. I forced his surname out of him but his full name or any way of identifying him to his manager was "none of my business". He punted me back to the general helpline after this.
Eventually I managed to find someone with a braincell who punted me to the registration helpline. By this point I've lost the will to live, gained a new VAT number that HMRC don't know where it came from, gained a "debt" over £2000 and possibly a dodgy credit rating. (The company is closed so can the debt be assigned to me as an individual? HMRC certainly don't know).
A lady promises to call me back. Shockingly she actually does. We have made some progress! Here's how things are resolved:
"Hello Mr MyName. We've found the problem. A new VAT number was generated which is odd because they're only generated after someone applies for one. We don't know what happened to be honest but we've closed it off so just forget all about it".
"Erm, what about the debt collectors, my potential credit rating and the fact it could happen again if you don't know the cause"
"No no MyName, just forget all about it. Or write in asking us to confirm it's all taken care of"
"Well can't you just put that in wiring anyway?"
"No MyName, not without you requesting it in writing".
So now I have to write to them to get confirmation from them that I don't owe them money, the debt collectors have been called off (and they've confirmed to HMRC their files have been closed) and why exactly a new VAT number was registered to a closed company.
And they wonder why people go mad with shotguns...
HMRC very kindly told me they'd already sent a debt to a collection agency and were about to send another if I didn't cough up. That's all the detail, no indication of what the debt was for or for when. And it was for a company that's been closed for nearly three years. Being a good citizen I called the "helpline" and promptly fell down the rabbit hole.
The debt helpline couldn't do anything apart from tell me the debt was for VAT returns from this year and I had to call the VAT helpline - which is only open office hours. I was first in the queue on Friday. They couldn't tell me anything and shunted me off to the de-registration helpline. Who helpfully shunted me back to the debt helpline.
Ah, but this time I got a bit further. This chappy revealed I had a brand new VAT number but couldn't/wouldn't say why or how it had been created. He said that because it was on the computer it was correct. HMRC never make mistakes and if I continue to ask questions he would hang up on me. He also tells me to file nil returns which would cancel the debt but not call off the debt collectors (?) and I could then apply to have the VAT registration cancelled. This idiot also told me the VAT35 confirmation of de-registration from VAT didn't exist and I've just made it up. I forced his surname out of him but his full name or any way of identifying him to his manager was "none of my business". He punted me back to the general helpline after this.
Eventually I managed to find someone with a braincell who punted me to the registration helpline. By this point I've lost the will to live, gained a new VAT number that HMRC don't know where it came from, gained a "debt" over £2000 and possibly a dodgy credit rating. (The company is closed so can the debt be assigned to me as an individual? HMRC certainly don't know).
A lady promises to call me back. Shockingly she actually does. We have made some progress! Here's how things are resolved:
"Hello Mr MyName. We've found the problem. A new VAT number was generated which is odd because they're only generated after someone applies for one. We don't know what happened to be honest but we've closed it off so just forget all about it".
"Erm, what about the debt collectors, my potential credit rating and the fact it could happen again if you don't know the cause"
"No no MyName, just forget all about it. Or write in asking us to confirm it's all taken care of"
"Well can't you just put that in wiring anyway?"
"No MyName, not without you requesting it in writing".
So now I have to write to them to get confirmation from them that I don't owe them money, the debt collectors have been called off (and they've confirmed to HMRC their files have been closed) and why exactly a new VAT number was registered to a closed company.
And they wonder why people go mad with shotguns...
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