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Channel 4 now - inside the Bernard Matthews factory

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    Channel 4 now - inside the Bernard Matthews factory

    3000000 turkeys pass through the factory for christmas.

    The "king boner" (their words not mine - chief butcher) can bone a turkey in 35 seconds - he's well practised as he's worked there 17 years
    "Experience hath shewn, that even under the best forms of government those entrusted with power have, in time, and by slow operations, perverted it into tyranny. "


    Thomas Jefferson

    #2
    Poor little sods. It's no life is it?
    +50 Xeno Geek Points
    Come back Toolpusher, scotspine, Voodooflux. Pogle
    As for the rest of you - DILLIGAF

    Purveyor of fine quality smut since 2005

    CUK Olympic University Challenge Champions 2010/2012

    Comment


      #3
      I really don't know what people see in Turkey at any time of the year, more of a tradition than a quality eating experience.

      I'll be having goose again this year, locally reared. No contest.
      Me, me, me...

      Comment


        #4
        Originally posted by Zippy View Post
        Poor little sods. It's no life is it?
        I know. 17 years....
        Last edited by RSoles; 12 December 2011, 21:27. Reason: Peroni

        Comment


          #5
          Originally posted by Cliphead View Post
          I really don't know what people see in Turkey at any time of the year, more of a tradition than a quality eating experience.

          I'll be having goose again this year, locally reared. No contest.
          Yeah we went with goose last year. V tasty - would go again if I was cooking.
          "Experience hath shewn, that even under the best forms of government those entrusted with power have, in time, and by slow operations, perverted it into tyranny. "


          Thomas Jefferson

          Comment


            #6
            Try duck instead, nice n crispy.
            "Never argue with stupid people, they will drag you down to their level and beat you with experience". Mark Twain

            Comment


              #7
              Cooked Swan is a particular favourite of mine.

              Basically head down to the local river at the dead of night. You need to wear black shoes, trousers, top and a hood so they cannot see you sneak up.

              Then in to the undergrowth where you sneak closer. Now. You must be careful for other predators such as foxes and the Polish(who can be quite nasty).

              Once you've managed to get closer you need to use a Swan mallet. This normally consists of a large sledgehammer or f**k off big piece of wood with some lead on the end(you can find these designs in some old Victorian manuals). A quick swift downward motion 1/2/3 times should do it near the head. Now, be careful. If you cannot do it quickly there is a good chance that the Swan may alert one of its friends like Dave the Twitcher down the road or the RSPCA. Both are harmless but can kick up a commotion.

              Then in a Tesco's for life bag and it's straight home and into the microwave.

              Delicious.
              What happens in General, stays in General.
              You know what they say about assumptions!

              Comment


                #8
                Originally posted by MarillionFan View Post

                Then in to the undergrowth where you sneak closer. Now. You must be careful for other predators such as foxes and the Polish(who can be quite nasty).
                When freedom comes along, don't PISH in the water supply.....

                Comment


                  #9
                  Originally posted by Cliphead View Post
                  I really don't know what people see in Turkey at any time of the year, more of a tradition than a quality eating experience.

                  I'll be having goose again this year, locally reared. No contest.
                  Goose at Christmas is as much a gimmick as turkey. Get one another time when they're not so stupidly expensive.
                  We're going for a couple of decent chickens from a local farm, that's the plan so far anyway!
                  Originally posted by MaryPoppins
                  I'd still not breastfeed a nazi
                  Originally posted by vetran
                  Urine is quite nourishing

                  Comment


                    #10
                    Originally posted by MarillionFan View Post
                    Cooked Swan is a particular favourite of mine.

                    Basically head down to the local river at the dead of night. You need to wear black shoes, trousers, top and a hood so they cannot see you sneak up.

                    Then in to the undergrowth where you sneak closer. Now. You must be careful for other predators such as foxes and the Polish(who can be quite nasty).

                    Once you've managed to get closer you need to use a Swan mallet. This normally consists of a large sledgehammer or f**k off big piece of wood with some lead on the end(you can find these designs in some old Victorian manuals). A quick swift downward motion 1/2/3 times should do it near the head. Now, be careful. If you cannot do it quickly there is a good chance that the Swan may alert one of its friends like Dave the Twitcher down the road or the RSPCA. Both are harmless but can kick up a commotion.

                    Then in a Tesco's for life bag and it's straight home and into the microwave.

                    Delicious.
                    Sneak up? Who the **** do you think you're kidding?

                    Comment

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