- Visitors can check out the Forum FAQ by clicking this link. You have to register before you can post: click the REGISTER link above to proceed. To start viewing messages, select the forum that you want to visit from the selection below. View our Forum Privacy Policy.
- Want to receive the latest contracting news and advice straight to your inbox? Sign up to the ContractorUK newsletter here. Every sign up will also be entered into a draw to WIN £100 Amazon vouchers!
Lion in Essex
Collapse
X
-
-
Originally posted by NickFitz View Post -
Time to get the catapult and some marbles to whip it in to a froth before the police get there. Good evenings entertainment for sure.'CUK forum personality of 2011 - Winner - Yes really!!!!Comment
-
-
or the tiger_of_LutonWhat happens in General, stays in General.You know what they say about assumptions!Comment
-
plod:anyone who sees the animal is advised to dial 999
EO:anyone who sees the animal is advised to turn around and run like fck
(\__/)
(>'.'<)
("")("") Born to Drink. Forced to WorkComment
-
Two men are walking through Essex. Suddenly, they see a lion in the distance, running towards them. They turn and start running away. But then one of them stops, takes some running shoes from his bag, and starts putting the on.
'What are you doing?' says the other man. 'Do you think you will run faster than the lion with those?'
'I don't have to run faster than the lion,' he says. 'I just have to run faster than you.'
Boom boom'CUK forum personality of 2011 - Winner - Yes really!!!!Comment
-
A man walks into a bar with a giraffe. He walks up to the bar and takes a seat, the giraffe does the same. The man orders a beer for himself and a double scotch for the giraffe. They both proceed to drink and after a while they order the same again. They continue all night, ordering the same drinks, drinking them and ordering another load untill suddenly the giraffe falls off his stool and lies unconscious on the floor. The man gets up of his stool and heads for the door, The barman shouts at him as he heads out the door ‘You can’t leave that lyin’ ‘ere!’ to which the man replies, ‘Its not a lion its a giraffe!
I thank youWhat happens in General, stays in General.You know what they say about assumptions!Comment
-
-
Is it a Lion you might see in Kenya?What happens in General, stays in General.You know what they say about assumptions!Comment
- Home
- News & Features
- First Timers
- IR35 / S660 / BN66
- Employee Benefit Trusts
- Agency Workers Regulations
- MSC Legislation
- Limited Companies
- Dividends
- Umbrella Company
- VAT / Flat Rate VAT
- Job News & Guides
- Money News & Guides
- Guide to Contracts
- Successful Contracting
- Contracting Overseas
- Contractor Calculators
- MVL
- Contractor Expenses
Advertisers
Contractor Services
CUK News
- Streamline Your Retirement with iSIPP: A Solution for Contractor Pensions Sep 1 09:13
- Making the most of pension lump sums: overview for contractors Sep 1 08:36
- Umbrella company tribunal cases are opening up; are your wages subject to unlawful deductions, too? Aug 31 08:38
- Contractors, relabelling 'labour' as 'services' to appear 'fully contracted out' won't dupe IR35 inspectors Aug 31 08:30
- How often does HMRC check tax returns? Aug 30 08:27
- Work-life balance as an IT contractor: 5 top tips from a tech recruiter Aug 30 08:20
- Autumn Statement 2023 tipped to prioritise mental health, in a boost for UK workplaces Aug 29 08:33
- Final reminder for contractors to respond to the umbrella consultation (closing today) Aug 29 08:09
- Top 5 most in demand cyber security contract roles Aug 25 08:38
- Changes to the right to request flexible working are incoming, but how will contractors be affected? Aug 24 08:25
Comment