Just dodged a drunk-driving ban.....

**MayContainNuts** · 17 November 2012, 03:27

Good man!!! Next time though make it 15 pints, may as well be hung for a sheep as a lamb!!!

**TykeMerc** · 17 November 2012, 03:37

Shame they didn't get you or you didn't manage to obliterate yourself against a sturdy inanimate object.

Having lost a very good friend to a drink driving cretin I'd rather you were off the road for good. I don't find your "tale" even marginally amusing and I sincerely hope you get collared.

**NotAllThere** · 17 November 2012, 06:03

Originally posted by TykeMerc View Post

... and I sincerely hope you get collared.

Hopefully before he kills someone and has to spend quality time with Bubba.

If you can't control your drinking to the extent you do stupid things like this, then maybe you should think about quitting.

**cojak** · 17 November 2012, 07:00

Originally posted by JaybeeInCUK View Post

Got a about 4-5 pints in me now, was bombing it back home at about 60 in a 30mph, coppers coming the other way, slowed down just as I passed them, but the rozzers turned around and followed.

Luckily was only a few turns of the wheel from home, kept my speed down, indicated and missed home a bit, got to T-junction, the filth pull up next to me (at which point I realised my deception job had been a good'un), lowered the window and went into my (true) story about how I'm helping their colleagues with id'ing the perp in an assault last week, the Boar asks, "What's that got to do with anything?"

I reply, "Nothing, admittedly", in my most clipped tones. It's dark, I drive pretty well when drunk and made sure I enunciated crisply but didn't overcook in case they caught on.

THe Sow sat next to the Boar asked me how long I had the car, my registered address, why I'd missed my new address (the road is on a slope), I suppose my articulate delivery, high forehead and geek glasses closed the show.

Thank FERRRRRRRRRRRRK they didn't ask me to get out of the car and get close to me. I was nearly toast.....

I live to drink drive another day.

JB

Oh I think that deserves saving before you sober up and decide to pull this post. That way we can all see what a knob you are when you're drunk.

**EternalOptimist** · 17 November 2012, 07:19

Originally posted by JaybeeInCUK View Post

Got a about 4-5 pints in me now, was bombing it back home at about 60 in a 30mph, coppers coming the other way, slowed down just as I passed them, but the rozzers turned around and followed.

Luckily was only a few turns of the wheel from home, kept my speed down, indicated and missed home a bit, got to T-junction, the filth pull up next to me (at which point I realised my deception job had been a good'un), lowered the window and went into my (true) story about how I'm helping their colleagues with id'ing the perp in an assault last week, the Boar asks, "What's that got to do with anything?"

I reply, "Nothing, admittedly", in my most clipped tones. It's dark, I drive pretty well when drunk and made sure I enunciated crisply but didn't overcook in case they caught on.

THe Sow sat next to the Boar asked me how long I had the car, my registered address, why I'd missed my new address (the road is on a slope), I suppose my articulate delivery, high forehead and geek glasses closed the show.

Thank FERRRRRRRRRRRRK they didn't ask me to get out of the car and get close to me. I was nearly toast.....

I live to drink drive another day.

JB

Was it 4 or was it 5 BeeJay ?

I hope your new police commissioner brings back the birch. just for you

**doodab** · 17 November 2012, 07:23

You are a marked man now, they know you are a twat and are lulling you into a false sense of security to ensure that when they get you you'll end up doing time instead of paying a fine.

**SupremeSpod** · 17 November 2012, 07:55

4 pints?

A shandy drinking poofter like you wouldn't be able to find your car never mind drive the ******* thing home.

Congrats on winding up the great unwashed though.

**KentPhilip** · 17 November 2012, 08:26

Originally posted by NotAllThere View Post

If you can't control your drinking to the extent you do stupid things like this,...

What, starting this thread?

I got pulled over by the rozzers once when I'd had a couple and possibly borderline, and I blew 7/35.
"Seven" I exclaimed. "I could have had another pint!"
They didn't like that.

**Mich the Tester** · 17 November 2012, 08:44

Originally posted by JaybeeInCUK View Post

Got a about 4-5 pints in me now, was bombing it back home at about 60 in a 30mph, coppers coming the other way, slowed down just as I passed them, but the rozzers turned around and followed.

Luckily was only a few turns of the wheel from home, kept my speed down, indicated and missed home a bit, got to T-junction, the filth pull up next to me (at which point I realised my deception job had been a good'un), lowered the window and went into my (true) story about how I'm helping their colleagues with id'ing the perp in an assault last week, the Boar asks, "What's that got to do with anything?"

I reply, "Nothing, admittedly", in my most clipped tones. It's dark, I drive pretty well when drunk and made sure I enunciated crisply but didn't overcook in case they caught on.

THe Sow sat next to the Boar asked me how long I had the car, my registered address, why I'd missed my new address (the road is on a slope), I suppose my articulate delivery, high forehead and geek glasses closed the show.

Thank FERRRRRRRRRRRRK they didn't ask me to get out of the car and get close to me. I was nearly toast.....

I live to drink drive another day.

JB

You seem to be very proud of yourself. Maybe when you're sober and you put a bit of thought into this you'll realise you've done something very silly and there's nothing to be proud of. I know someone who's been paralysed from the neck down by a drink driver and I don't think he'd be amused by this story. Please reconsider your behaviour and get a taxi next time. We all make mistakes from time to time and have to learn from them, but it's nothing to boast about.

Just dodged a drunk-driving ban.....