A Letter to the contractor employment "Industry"

[Contractoid]

Dear Industry,
What are you doing exactly?

When you "agents" call us up are you actually within the same universe as our own with the same physical laws and standard ways of dealing with other human beings? Have you actually READ our CV's properly before you start drilling us on what we know about "XYZ" when you are clearly just out out of University / College and blatantly know f%%% all about "XYZ" by your pathetic mind numbingly postured questions about what we know about "XYZ". When you probe us on what our "last" day rate was as though this was the Holy Grail of uniquely identifying what our future day rate SHOULD for now and ever be defined, do you not start questioning how empty and shallow your existence is? When you lie through your but about things like "exclusivity" and "you are the only candidate being interviewed" and "the client wants to move really quickly" etc etc etc etc etc etc etc etc etc etc etc etc etc etc etc etc etc etc etc etc etc etc.........and on an and on to very single cliche you have ever uttered to the point where you actually believe your own bulls***T and sleep at night like a baby dreaming about it.

When you "clients", supposed professionals, who engage with the above waste of flesh and organs think "well this whole setup is fine and dandy, we pay this bunch of chimps a fee to find the best that's out there to find our ideal candidate even if previous experience has been like putting our money on a roulette wheel spin but hell let's go with anyway".

Do you think that might generate an element of - well, cynicism / annoyance?

***** the lot of you.

[Churchill]

Dear Industry,
What are you doing exactly?

When you "agents" call us up are you actually within the same universe as our own with the same physical laws and standard conducts of dealing with other human beings? Have you actually READ our CV's properly before you start drilling us on what we know about "XYZ" when you are clearly just out out of University / College and blatantly know f%%% all about "XYZ" by your pathetic mind numbingly postured questions about what we know about "XYZ". When you probe us on what our "last" day rate was as though this was the Holy Grail of uniquely identifying what our future day rate SHOULD for now an ever be defined, do you not start questioning how empty and shallow your existence is? When you lie through your but about things like "exclusivity" and "you are the only candidate being interviewed" and "the client wants to move really quickly" etc etc etc etc etc etc etc etc etc etc etc etc etc etc etc etc etc etc etc etc etc etc.........and on an and on to very single cliche you have ever uttered to the point where you actually believe your own bulls***T and sleep at night like a baby dreaming about it.

When you "clients", supposed professionals, who engage with the above waste of flesh and organs think "well this whole setup is fine and dandy, we pay this bunch of chimps a fee to find the best that's out there to find our ideal candidate even if previous experience has been like putting our money on a roulette wheel spin but hell let's go with anyway".

Do you think that might generate an element of - well, cynicism / annoyance?

***** the lot of you.

You could always go permie.

Failing that, grow up and realise that there are good and bad suppliers/providers in all industries.

A rant like the one you've posted doesn't help.

Save the boozing for the weekend.

[Paddy]

A Letter to the contractor employment "Industry"

[DodgyAgent]

Dear Industry,
What are you doing exactly?

When you "agents" call us up are you actually within the same universe as our own with the same physical laws and standard conducts of dealing with other human beings? Have you actually READ our CV's properly before you start drilling us on what we know about "XYZ" when you are clearly just out out of University / College and blatantly know f%%% all about "XYZ" by your pathetic mind numbingly postured questions about what we know about "XYZ". When you probe us on what our "last" day rate was as though this was the Holy Grail of uniquely identifying what our future day rate SHOULD for now an ever be defined, do you not start questioning how empty and shallow your existence is? When you lie through your but about things like "exclusivity" and "you are the only candidate being interviewed" and "the client wants to move really quickly" etc etc etc etc etc etc etc etc etc etc etc etc etc etc etc etc etc etc etc etc etc etc.........and on an and on to very single cliche you have ever uttered to the point where you actually believe your own bulls***T and sleep at night like a baby dreaming about it.

When you "clients", supposed professionals, who engage with the above waste of flesh and organs think "well this whole setup is fine and dandy, we pay this bunch of chimps a fee to find the best that's out there to find our ideal candidate even if previous experience has been like putting our money on a roulette wheel spin but hell let's go with anyway".

Do you think that might generate an element of - well, cynicism / annoyance?

***** the lot of you.

Don't forget the references

[DodgyAgent]

Dear Industry,
What are you doing exactly?

When you "agents" call us up are you actually within the same universe as our own with the same physical laws and standard conducts of dealing with other human beings? Have you actually READ our CV's properly before you start drilling us on what we know about "XYZ" when you are clearly just out out of University / College and blatantly know f%%% all about "XYZ" by your pathetic mind numbingly postured questions about what we know about "XYZ". When you probe us on what our "last" day rate was as though this was the Holy Grail of uniquely identifying what our future day rate SHOULD for now an ever be defined, do you not start questioning how empty and shallow your existence is? When you lie through your but about things like "exclusivity" and "you are the only candidate being interviewed" and "the client wants to move really quickly" etc etc etc etc etc etc etc etc etc etc etc etc etc etc etc etc etc etc etc etc etc etc.........and on an and on to very single cliche you have ever uttered to the point where you actually believe your own bulls***T and sleep at night like a baby dreaming about it.

When you "clients", supposed professionals, who engage with the above waste of flesh and organs think "well this whole setup is fine and dandy, we pay this bunch of chimps a fee to find the best that's out there to find our ideal candidate even if previous experience has been like putting our money on a roulette wheel spin but hell let's go with anyway".

Do you think that might generate an element of - well, cynicism / annoyance?

***** the lot of you.

I am afraid that until there is a shortage of IT contractors the task of finding the ones you need is not that hard. It is simply a matter of getting some oik who can just about read or write to pick out a few CVs, check availability, match a few choice buzz words and shove a shortlist of CVs into the line manager and bobs your uncle (pardon the pun).

You guys need the work so you will just have to deal with it.

[Old Greg]

I am afraid that until there is a shortage of IT contractors the task of finding the ones you need is not that hard. It is simply a matter of getting some oik who can just about read or write to pick out a few CVs, check availability, match a few choice buzz words and shove a shortlist of CVs into the line manager and bobs your uncle (pardon the pun).

You guys need the work so you will just have to deal with it.

Yes boss.

[SussexSeagull]

While I agree with a lot of that, the industry as a whole has allowed this status quo to develop.

When I was permanent, contractors were seen as the cream of the crop and we're brought in by clients for specific tasks they couldn't do in house.

This has slowly changed to them not wanting to take the risk on recruiting permanent people and getting in contractors to 'do work' (which is not to criticise the people doing it, it had paid my mortgage for several years).

Throw in the influx of foreign talent and the days where agents developed relationships are long gone (less some niche areas).

[Mich the Tester]

Throw in the influx of foreign talent and the days where agents developed relationships are long gone (less some niche areas).

Talent? Where is she? We need pictures!

[Mich the Tester]

Dear Industry,
...
you "agents" ...do you not start questioning how empty and shallow your existence is?

What do you think? If you'd just pulled in another PSL so you can sit on your arse drinking champagne while young, fit ladies rush around the country on your behalf in company Audi A1s, dragging in contractors to make you more money, would you worry about the emptiness of your existence?

[MarillionFan]

I've employed 4 contractors in the last year, 2 UK and 2 US.
In each case every one has been bought in to do one of the core skills that I used to contract in (2xBA/ 1xSQL Developer / 1xSenior Data Analyst). I terminated one BA, didn't renew another and about to not renew the Analyst. Only the SQL developer is left and whereas she has some skills they still need hand holding, but theyre foreign and cheaper than the onshore equivalent and that's why theyre still used.

I've worked with hardly any decent contractors in my time & the best ones I do know are all ones I've initially mentored and who have gone on to do way better than I ever did.

Decent contractors are hard to find.