BGG’s Celery Law

[Halo Jones]

I thought I would share this as it made me laugh,

A random email correspondence today between BGG & I:

In which I happened to mention that I plan on celery for lunch & his response was:


“I’m too afraid to eat it, since it’s well known that eating celery consumes more calories than digesting the celery itself.

Hence, you are using up more energy, than exists in the celery in the first place.

This in turn confuses one of the laws of physics and thermodynamics, which states that “Energy can neither be created nor destroyed, merely changed”.

Using up by eating, implies a diminishing of the available energy.

Which scares the willies off me, because whilst you may be changing the energy state during consumption, what happens when all the celery has gone ? That there is no more energy to transform ?

The Laws of Thermodynamics are not very clear on this point, viz-a-viz Celery Consumption, so I would postulate BGG’s Celery Law

1. “When the last atom of celery is consumed, the on-going transformation of energy from one state to another enters an unknown state. In order to measure this unknown state, one needs a Schrodinger’s Cat. However, since no one has actually even seen a Schrodinger’s Cat, and even if they did, their act of observation would likely result in a 50% likelihood of death (of the cat), the state of celery cannot be determined, and thus the universe goes in to a sulky fit and then unravels. Probably.”

I would like to mention that I did indeed eat the celery & the universe has not unravelled – you may have noticed this.

[SimonMac]

I thought I would share this as it made me laugh,

A random email correspondence today between BGG & I:

In which I happened to mention that I plan on celery for lunch & his response was:


“I’m too afraid to eat it, since it’s well known that eating celery consumes more calories than digesting the celery itself.

Hence, you are using up more energy, than exists in the celery in the first place.

This in turn confuses one of the laws of physics and thermodynamics, which states that “Energy can neither be created nor destroyed, merely changed”.

Using up by eating, implies a diminishing of the available energy.

Which scares the willies off me, because whilst you may be changing the energy state during consumption, what happens when all the celery has gone ? That there is no more energy to transform ?

The Laws of Thermodynamics are not very clear on this point, viz-a-viz Celery Consumption, so I would postulate BGG’s Celery Law

1. “When the last atom of celery is consumed, the on-going transformation of energy from one state to another enters an unknown state. In order to measure this unknown state, one needs a Schrodinger’s Cat. However, since no one has actually even seen a Schrodinger’s Cat, and even if they did, their act of observation would likely result in a 50% likelihood of death (of the cat), the state of celery cannot be determined, and thus the universe goes in to a sulky fit and then unravels. Probably.”

I would like to mention that I did indeed eat the celery & the universe has not unravelled – you may have noticed this.

TL;DR

[Old Greg]

I thought I would share this as it made me laugh,

A random email correspondence today between BGG & I:

In which I happened to mention that I plan on celery for lunch & his response was:


“I’m too afraid to eat it, since it’s well known that eating celery consumes more calories than digesting the celery itself.

Hence, you are using up more energy, than exists in the celery in the first place.

This in turn confuses one of the laws of physics and thermodynamics, which states that “Energy can neither be created nor destroyed, merely changed”.

Using up by eating, implies a diminishing of the available energy.

Which scares the willies off me, because whilst you may be changing the energy state during consumption, what happens when all the celery has gone ? That there is no more energy to transform ?

The Laws of Thermodynamics are not very clear on this point, viz-a-viz Celery Consumption, so I would postulate BGG’s Celery Law

1. “When the last atom of celery is consumed, the on-going transformation of energy from one state to another enters an unknown state. In order to measure this unknown state, one needs a Schrodinger’s Cat. However, since no one has actually even seen a Schrodinger’s Cat, and even if they did, their act of observation would likely result in a 50% likelihood of death (of the cat), the state of celery cannot be determined, and thus the universe goes in to a sulky fit and then unravels. Probably.”

I would like to mention that I did indeed eat the celery & the universe has not unravelled – you may have noticed this.

A nice theory but tell him not to worry. Negative calorie food - Wikipedia, the free encyclopedia

Foods that are claimed to be negative in calories are mostly low-calorie fruits and vegetables such as celery, grapefruit, lemon, lime, apple, lettuce, broccoli and cabbage.[2] There is no scientific evidence to show that any of these foods have a negative calorific impact.[3][4] Celery has a thermic effect of around 8%, much less than the 100% or more required for a food to have "negative calories". A stalk of celery provides 6 calories to the body, but the body expends only half of a single calorie digesting it.[2][5] Even proteins, which require the most energy to digest, only have a thermic energy of 20%–30%.[2]
Diets based on negative calorie food do not work as advertised, but can lead to weight loss because they satisfy hunger by filling the stomach with food that has a lower calorie count per volume.

[DaveB]

I thought I would share this as it made me laugh,

A random email correspondence today between BGG & I:

In which I happened to mention that I plan on celery for lunch & his response was:


“I’m too afraid to eat it, since it’s well known that eating celery consumes more calories than digesting the celery itself.

Hence, you are using up more energy, than exists in the celery in the first place.

This in turn confuses one of the laws of physics and thermodynamics, which states that “Energy can neither be created nor destroyed, merely changed”.

Using up by eating, implies a diminishing of the available energy.

Which scares the willies off me, because whilst you may be changing the energy state during consumption, what happens when all the celery has gone ? That there is no more energy to transform ?

The Laws of Thermodynamics are not very clear on this point, viz-a-viz Celery Consumption, so I would postulate BGG’s Celery Law

1. “When the last atom of celery is consumed, the on-going transformation of energy from one state to another enters an unknown state. In order to measure this unknown state, one needs a Schrodinger’s Cat. However, since no one has actually even seen a Schrodinger’s Cat, and even if they did, their act of observation would likely result in a 50% likelihood of death (of the cat), the state of celery cannot be determined, and thus the universe goes in to a sulky fit and then unravels. Probably.”

I would like to mention that I did indeed eat the celery & the universe has not unravelled – you may have noticed this.

That's because there is still celery left in the universe. While celery still exists the paradox cannot manifest and the universe remains in a ravelled state. By extension, the use of a Schrodinger's Rabbit would provide an effective means by which the universe can be protected from celery related doom. Place the rabbit in the box as per the cat but place a stick of celery in the box with the rabbit. If the rabbit is dead it can't eat the celery, therefore the universe is safe, as there is always a stick of celery remaining. If the rabbit lives, it will eat the celery and the universe will end. Since we cannot know the state of the rabbit without opening the box, by the same principle cannot know the state of the celery either, so provided the box remains shut and the rabbit unobserved there will always be a potential stick of celery in existance and the universe will be safe.

[Ticktock]

Place the rabbit in the box as per the cat but place a stick of celery in the box with the rabbit. If the rabbit is dead it can't eat the celery, therefore the universe is safe, as there is always a stick of celery remaining. If the rabbit lives, it will eat the celery and the universe will end. Since we cannot know the state of the rabbit without opening the box, by the same principle cannot know the state of the celery either, so provided the box remains shut and the rabbit unobserved there will always be a potential stick of celery in existance and the universe will be safe.

I thought I'd take your advice and become the Saviour Of The Universe (invoice is winging its way out).

So I got a stick of celery, put it in the box. I got a rabbit, put in the box. I closed the box. This is where the problems started.

I heard the cat start yowling, the box started shaking, and now the cardboard is starting to take on a damp reddish look.

Does this mean that I'll have to raise a credit note against my invoice? I'd ask my accountant but I think he was near the epicentre of the nascent unravelling.

[DaveB]

I thought I'd take your advice and become the Saviour Of The Universe (invoice is winging it's way out).

So I got a stick of celery, put it in the box. I got a rabbit, put in the box. I closed the box. This is where the problems started.

I heard the cat start yowling, the box started shaking, and now the cardboard is starting to take on a damp reddish look.

Does this mean that I'll have to raise a credit note against my invoice? I'd ask my accountant but I think he was near the epicentre of the nascent unravelling.

Whatever you do, don't open the box!

[mudskipper]

However, as we explored some time ago, a pound of lard contains more calories than a pound of lard.

http://forums.contractoruk.com/gener...ood-maths.html

[DaveB]

However, as we explored some time ago, a pound of lard contains more calories than a pound of lard.

http://forums.contractoruk.com/gener...ood-maths.html

So provided you only ever eat celery when it's been dipped in lard, everything is fine!

[d000hg]

I prefer cucumber to celery as "empty food" because you're getting a drink at the same time. And it doesn't taste foul, although eating a half-cucumber is a bit homoerotic I suppose.

[doodab]

I prefer cucumber to celery as "empty food" because you're getting a drink at the same time.

Hence my love of beer.