Petition to make Tony Blair a Saint

[mudskipper]

Comedians launch petition to make Tony Blair a saint | Political Scrapbook

Sounds like an excellent idea.

To be a saint, you have to be dead.

Saints have traditionally died horrible deaths - some ideas for Saint Tony below:

St Sebastian - tied to a tree and shot with arrows
St Cecilia - beheaded, but botched, so she bled to death for three days.
St Cyriacus - limbs torn off (then beheaded)
St Mercurius - Tortured with nails and burned (then beheaded)
St Valentine - Clubbed and stoned (then beheaded)
St Lawrence - Roasted alive on a giant grill.
St Ignatius - eaten by lions
St Bartholemew - flayed, then crucified upside down
St Catherine - sentenced to death on the breaking wheel, but ended up being beheaded.

[SimonMac]

Leave the guy alone, what has he ever done to you....

[mudskipper]

Leave the guy alone, what has he ever done to you....

Longleat's got lots of lions, hasn't it?

[NotAllThere]

The sawing in half has to be done from the groin down (with the victim in an inverted position). This keeps the blood flowing to the brain, so they take longer to die. Sawing the head first is a bit dim.

[Doggy Styles]

What miracles did he perform?

As I understand it he has to have performed two - the first for beatification (to become the Blessed Tony Blair), the second for sainthood.

(BTW Turning green shoots to sh1te was Gordon's miracle.)

[MicrosoftBob]

What miracles did he perform?

As I understand it he has to have performed two - the first for beatification (to become the Blessed Tony Blair), the second for sainthood.

(BTW Turning green shoots to sh1te was Gordon's miracle.)

He looked upon Cherie Blair without turning to stone, and even more of a miracle he managed to sleep with her without giving in to suicidal urges afterwards

[Bunk]

What miracles did he perform?

As I understand it he has to have performed two - the first for beatification (to become the Blessed Tony Blair), the second for sainthood.

(BTW Turning green shoots to sh1te was Gordon's miracle.)

Gordon also saved the world! Maybe he should be the saint.

[vetran]

hung drawn & quartered - sorry I'm a bit of a traditionalist.

Miracles :
managing to keep a straight face when lying about.
Iraq
PFI
Immigration
almost everything else.

[Mich the Tester]

hung drawn & quartered - sorry I'm a bit of a traditionalist.

Miracles :
managing to keep a straight face when lying about.
Iraq
PFI
Immigration
almost everything else.

Don't forget that he became a 'Peace Envoy' to the middle east in 2007 and since then most of it's been even worse than ever before. Of course, we should avoid 'post hoc ergo propter hoc', but I'd have been surprised if there'd been any other result.

[alluvial]

The sawing in half has to be done from the groin down (with the victim in an inverted position). This keeps the blood flowing to the brain, so they take longer to die. Sawing the head first is a bit dim.

It also keeps the victim conscious and apparently you can get the saw down to the sternum before they pass out.

As this punishment was reserved for women that have fornicated with the devil, perhaps this one isn't for Old Tone.