Pub Bulltulip

[suityou01]

I love it. As I rarely go out to the pub these days (working too hard, demands of the brood etc etc) I do like a nice bit of pub bultulip.

Last nights episode comes right out of the top drawer, from none other than my bezzie mate.

This absolute gem, went something like this :

"I think the government could have handled the banking bailout differently. I mean they just handed tax payers cash to the banks, and they still paid bonuses and did what the hell they liked. What I would have done is give everyone a million pounds on the proviso that :

If they have a mortgage, they pay it off (thus helping the banks).
If they don't have a mortgage, they buy a British car (brand new) thus helping industry.
If they are on benefits they can't claim any for 5 years.
If they are retired they can't claim state pension for 5 years.
They have to take out medical insurance."

I obviously ripped this to shreds and in the end he was a mere shadow of his former idealistic self.

Just wanted to see what the panel make of his idea. As a thought experiment it whiled away a few pints quite nicely.

[vwdan]

That thought probably originates from a post doing the rounds on Facebook etc a few years back with, as you'd expect, some serious mathematical errors.

[suityou01]

That thought probably originates from a post doing the rounds on Facebook etc a few years back with, as you'd expect, some serious mathematical errors.

He is not on Facebook and abhors it. Unlikely. I genuinely believe this is the twisted brain wrong of a one off man mental.

[Ruprect]

I love it. As I rarely go out to the pub these days (working too hard, demands of the brood etc etc) I do like a nice bit of pub bultulip.

Last nights episode comes right out of the top drawer, from none other than my bezzie mate.

This absolute gem, went something like this :

"I think the government could have handled the banking bailout differently. I mean they just handed tax payers cash to the banks, and they still paid bonuses and did what the hell they liked. What I would have done is give everyone a million pounds on the proviso that :

If they have a mortgage, they pay it off (thus helping the banks).
If they don't have a mortgage, they buy a British car (brand new) thus helping industry.
If they are on benefits they can't claim any for 5 years.
If they are retired they can't claim state pension for 5 years.
They have to take out medical insurance."

I obviously ripped this to shreds and in the end he was a mere shadow of his former idealistic self.

Just wanted to see what the panel make of his idea. As a thought experiment it whiled away a few pints quite nicely.

You've got friends? Sorry, I don't believe a word of this.

[suityou01]

You've got friends? Sorry, I don't believe a word of this.

Rented friend. HTH.

[Ruprect]

Rented friend. HTH.

Now that is much more believeable

[VectraMan]

For one thing, giving 60 million people £1 million each would cost £60 trillion, which is slightly more than the bank bailout.

[vwdan]

He is not on Facebook and abhors it. Unlikely. I genuinely believe this is the twisted brain wrong of a one off man mental.

What you've posted is near verbatim how the post went, and the last point is a clear Americanism.

[suityou01]

For one thing, giving 60 million people £1 million each would cost £60 trillion, which is slightly more than the bank bailout.

2 points to you. That was my first point. The figure was then revised down to £100,000 and the 5 years slashed to 2.

Next.

[pjclarke]

What you've posted is near verbatim how the post went, and the last point is a clear Americanism.

Nope, its Chris Morris

Brass Eye - Wikiquote


Digression good for a half-pint: we could have given every Falkland Islander £1m, and moved them to the Orkneys for less than the cost of the war. And no-one would have needed to die.

(No idea if this is true, we are in pubreality here)