I don't normally make New Year's resolutions. In fact, this year I've actually made an anti-New Year's resolution and cancelled my gym membership. I've always found going to the gym a chore but finding it packed to the rafters with people on a New Year's fitness fad, I can't get on to any of my instruments of torture when I want to and getting changed in the locker room is like a game of Twister.
That said, I do need to go on a bit of a detox - particularly paying attention to what I eat - my insides took a right Royal battering over Christmas!
Of course, it won't last because events will unfold exactly the same as they do every year. The sequence of events normally starts with me thinking that I need to eat less processed food, less meat, fewer fatty things and more fruit and veg and then, over a short period of time, this thought process gets refined into me thinking I am going to cut out meat altogether and eat nothing but organic produce. And therein lies the problem as I will inevitably be led to the local health food shop. Now, this isn't Holland and Barratt by any means but a real sandal lover's panoply of soya derivatives and enough fibre packing wholemeal fayre to glue your ribs together for a lifetime with plenty of herbal infusions thrown in for good measure.
And I will duly buy enough to last me a week. And by the end of that week I will be completely and utterly sick to the back teeth of it and find myself in Barnacle Bill's ordering double haddock and chips to counteract the comfort food deficit I've accumulated over the preceding week. It's about all the dreary wholesomeness I can take....
That said, I do need to go on a bit of a detox - particularly paying attention to what I eat - my insides took a right Royal battering over Christmas!
Of course, it won't last because events will unfold exactly the same as they do every year. The sequence of events normally starts with me thinking that I need to eat less processed food, less meat, fewer fatty things and more fruit and veg and then, over a short period of time, this thought process gets refined into me thinking I am going to cut out meat altogether and eat nothing but organic produce. And therein lies the problem as I will inevitably be led to the local health food shop. Now, this isn't Holland and Barratt by any means but a real sandal lover's panoply of soya derivatives and enough fibre packing wholemeal fayre to glue your ribs together for a lifetime with plenty of herbal infusions thrown in for good measure.
And I will duly buy enough to last me a week. And by the end of that week I will be completely and utterly sick to the back teeth of it and find myself in Barnacle Bill's ordering double haddock and chips to counteract the comfort food deficit I've accumulated over the preceding week. It's about all the dreary wholesomeness I can take....
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