Do men have a right to "hit" on women?

[unixman]

Was having a big to-do about this with my step sister who was getting all irate about someone who dined at her hotel a few times alone, giving her a fairly forward Christmas card. Nothing rude, but it read along the lines of:

"Dear Katie, thank you for making me smile; you are one of the most beautiful women I have ever had the pleasure of meeting. I know this is forward but, it's Christmas so... Would you like to join me for a drink one evening? I'll expect a no but hold out for a Christmas Miracle if you were to say yes. See you soon, MR Something. <insert mobile number here>"...

Nothing wrong with that and I don't know why it would make someone angry. Unrequited advances are slightly embarrassing of course, but anger is the wrong response. When someone of the opposite sex expresses an interest, it is better to let them down gently, rather than stamp all over their feelings or go telling tales.

[mattfx]

Hopefully Surrey dog walkers can still hit on cyclists with any calibre weapon they choose.

My mum told me the best time to ask my dad for anything was during sex. Not the best advice I'd ever been given. I burst in through the bedroom door saying: "Can I have a new bicycle?" He was very upset. His secretary was surprisingly nice about it. I got the bicycle.

[mattfx]

Nothing wrong with that and I don't know why it would make someone angry. Unrequited advances are slightly embarrassing of course, but anger is the wrong response. When someone of the opposite sex expresses an interest, it is better to let them down gently, rather than stamp all over their feelings or go telling tales.

I completely agree! But this is what we, as men, are up against!

[BrilloPad]

Nothing wrong with that and I don't know why it would make someone angry. Unrequited advances are slightly embarrassing of course, but anger is the wrong response. When someone of the opposite sex expresses an interest, it is better to let them down gently, rather than stamp all over their feelings or go telling tales.

Hopefully though men will take no for an answer.....

[Jog On]

This has been done to death in the redpill forum and the conclusion is all down to how it is done. Being able to take a hint, not take it personally and just move on is quite key - which involves an abundance and probability mindset.

The other part is not being a creep, which is the major criticism coming out of the #metoo thing. Unattractive men abusing their situation to trick/cajole/force it rather than 'winning' it fair and square in an up front and honest way. Men who are afraid to communicate their real intentions so pretend to be 'not like other guys' and pedestal their love interests tend to be thought of as 'creepy' for this dishonesty.

Same goes for 'male feminists' who are actually just trying to get it on or rely heavily on female approval - they get an extra special level of contempt from the feminist community. Not fooling anyone...

[FrontEnder]

Was having a big to-do about this with my step sister who was getting all irate about someone who dined at her hotel a few times alone, giving her a fairly forward Christmas card. Nothing rude, but it read along the lines of:

"Dear Katie, thank you for making me smile; you are one of the most beautiful women I have ever had the pleasure of meeting. I know this is forward but, it's Christmas so... Would you like to join me for a drink one evening? I'll expect a no but hold out for a Christmas Miracle if you were to say yes. See you soon, MR Something. <insert mobile number here>"

Now. I thought that it was fairly well written, not over the top and clearly at the very least a compliment; if a nice looking girl gave me a surprise card like that i'd have whipped my phone out before I'd even properly read it! However, my step sister was saying how horrid it was to have been "letched" on like that by a customer and that he was clearly desperate blah blah yaddy yaddah. Personally I think that's far less seedy than walking up to a random bird in a bar and offering her a drink! At least the man had conversed with her a few times and knew a bit about her! If you walk up to a stranger and offer them a drink you may as well open with "Hey! I've been staring at your ass / breasts / legs / whatever for the last five minutes and think your clothes look far better on the floor than on you; Can I get you a drink!?" But apparently that's more acceptable and appropriate somehow...

What is wrong with women!?

I would guess there may be some context missing from the narrative.

If he's been obviously staring at her tits every time he sees here, it's understandable that the card might creep her out a bit.

[BrilloPad]

I would guess there may be some context missing from the narrative.

If he's been obviously staring at her tits every time he sees here, it's understandable that the card might creep her out a bit.

Is there anywhere else to stare?

[TwoWolves]

This whole debate is a bit of an Anglo-Saxon society problem, in Southern Europe everyone is just getting on with getting it on and flirting away as normal.

When I was younger I used to get hit on quite a lot, sometimes by women double my weight but I didn't get upset about it. I just admired their Chutzpah and politely let them down, it's my observation that European women (excepting Germans) are quite good at this and don't get flustered. My Spanish wife is amazingly good at this and it's great fun to watch.

British women expect you to read their mind and will get equally angry if you don't make a pass. The worst ones can't even decide if they want you to make a pass or not.

[Jog On]

This whole debate is a bit of an Anglo-Saxon society problem, in Southern Europe everyone is just getting on with getting it on and flirting away as normal.

When I was younger I used to get hit on quite a lot, sometimes by women double my weight but I didn't get upset about it. I just admired their Chutzpah and politely let them down, it's my observation that European women (excepting Germans) are quite good at this and don't get flustered. My Spanish wife is amazingly good at this and it's great fun to watch.

British women expect you to read their mind and will get equally angry if you don't make a pass. The worst ones can't even decide if they want you to make a pass or not.

I've seen this play out and experienced it personally since I made a concerted effort to stop looking at them on my daily commute. They will go out of their way to get my attention so they can eyeroll that I've 'checked them out'. The old pick up artist trick of acting completely disinterested in a woman and making her chase you seems to still be alive and well.

Doesn't help these days that they are now accustomed to and addicted to massive social media validation . While the young guys are developing unhealthy habits of gaming and pr0n, the girls are getting addicted to likes, comments and followers telling them how great they are several hundred times a day.

[mattfx]

the girls are getting addicted to likes, comments and followers telling them how great they are several hundred times a day.

Oh my god. This with bells on. I'm 27 and wouldn't ever remotely consider dating anyone younger; most of them are just so entrenched in Social Media that it's impossible to even get their attention and that's before you even get to the moral topic of "Ummm, if I'm your significant other should you be posting pictures of you in your lacy underware on the 'Gram?"

I'm pretty fortunate that neither my current lady friend or I particularly bother with Social Media and it definitely makes our relationship noticeably better for it. The previous potential Mrs. Matt FX was Polish and outstandingly attractive but addicted to random male attention on Facebook; the irony of it was she actually wasn't all that much of a fan of actual physical attention from me..! Go figure that one out.