My own personal motorway lane

[NotAllThere]

What annoys me is when the chauffer is driving along on cruise control and he ends up doing squares around someone because they can't maintain a regular pace.

Does your rolls not have adaptive cruise control? INKSPE.

[PhiltheGreek]

The House of Saud know how these things should be done

[saptastic]

https://forums.contractoruk.com/gene...ddle-lane.html

Should you flash, undertake, overtake, drive up their arse. So oblivious as well.

Middle Lane Hoggers kill me.
In fact they probably will one day.

[OwlHoot]

After dark, the middle lane of a three-lane motorway is marginally safer than lanes bordering the side of the road.

So I tend to stick in that at night, unless overtaking some slower middle lane hogger.

And if this winds up any pedant drivers behind me then feck 'em! They can hoot and flash all they like, but what do I care (*) ?

(*) Unless they start flashing blue lights!

edit: Actually, I read somewhere that becoming disproportionately irate when others don't "play by the rules" is a symptom of psychopathy! Psychos are happy to bend the rules to suit themselves, but are mystified and outraged when others do at the psycho's expense!

[Eirikur]

I did get pulled over by the rozzers once in the mid 90s for staying in the middle lane. It was 2am, and no-one else was around (except for the police of course). Not quite sure what the point was.

When I commuted on the M25 daily in the early 2000s, I realised that I kept being overtaken by the same trucks. It seems as soon as there's a slow down, the inside line actually moves faster. Now when I'm on a congested motorway, as soon as I see signs of a slow down, I get into the inside line. Makes for a faster, less stressful journey.

I do exactly the same thing, all people who think they have fast cars quickly go to the outside lane when they see a traffic jam ahead, I go into the inside lane and keep on driving for several hundred meters more

[stek]

And when there is a lane closure - I merge in right at the end - otherwise road capacity is being reduced and traffic flows more slowly. What's the point in merging a mile before and wasting tarmac?

Other drivers applaude my shining logic by showing me I'm number one by raising a finger and miming a banana from their foreheads to indicate that I deserve respect and they're 'thinking' food towards me in the shape of an imaginary banana.

Thanks fellow drivers, I appreciate it....

[Dark Black]

And when there is a lane closure - I merge in right at the end - otherwise road capacity is being reduced and traffic flows more slowly. What's the point in merging a mile before and wasting tarmac?

Other drivers applaude my shining logic by showing me I'm number one by raising a finger and miming a banana from their foreheads to indicate that I deserve respect and they're 'thinking' food towards me in the shape of an imaginary banana.

Thanks fellow drivers, I appreciate it....

This.

[NotAllThere]

...
And if this winds up any pedant drivers behind me then feck 'em! They can hoot and flash all they like, but what do I care (*) ?

(*) Unless they start flashing blue lights! ...

Yep, that's basically what happened to me.

And when there is a lane closure - I merge in right at the end - otherwise road capacity is being reduced and traffic flows more slowly. What's the point in merging a mile before and wasting tarmac?

Other drivers applaude my shining logic by showing me I'm number one by raising a finger and miming a banana from their foreheads to indicate that I deserve respect and they're 'thinking' food towards me in the shape of an imaginary banana.

Thanks fellow drivers, I appreciate it....

Well, I don't appreciate you. In fact I show my lack of appreciation by leaving space, and rudely waying you in.

[original PM]

And when there is a lane closure - I merge in right at the end - otherwise road capacity is being reduced and traffic flows more slowly. What's the point in merging a mile before and wasting tarmac?

Other drivers applaude my shining logic by showing me I'm number one by raising a finger and miming a banana from their foreheads to indicate that I deserve respect and they're 'thinking' food towards me in the shape of an imaginary banana.

Thanks fellow drivers, I appreciate it....

I know this is sarcasm but those people are the reason why traffic jams occur

The only way they can merge once they get to the end of the lane which is closed is for all the other traffic to slow down to zero to let them in

If everyone merged with a mile to go you would happily continue at a certain pace which is above zero.

[stek]

Just remember, back the 80's a mate of mine had a white Mini Metro with a stripe down the side so at first glance it *could* be a Police car.

He also had a Policemen's hat and used to slowly over take people on the motorway, put the hat on authoritatively, and point to the hard shoulder at the driver, who'd pull up as we sped off.

It wasn't even a real police hat, just pretend US copper's hat from a costume shop or something, plastic badges etc

He had some balls that lad, he had one missing hubcap on his car, spotted the same type on a police car, and stole it with the coppers in it while we distracted them in some way that escapes me now. Stag do, Blackpool.....