Blam and dast...

[Old Greg]

Best of luck, matey

[Coalman]

Hope all goes well for you.

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[vetran]

Feck.

I like your typo with Happy Pils. Isn't that just called "beer"?

nah Pils is Lager not real beer!

[vetran]

WTAS.

+1

no tongues!

wish you luck, we have 2 parents with cancer and it seems to be a very scary ride looking on, I have no idea how you cope with being in the hot seat.

[mudskipper]

Bloody hell - good luck and get better.

The "depressed" questionnaire was devised by the companies that sell anti-depressants. Doctors 'too reliant' on depression questionnaire designed by Pfizer, campaigners warn

It sounds like you're entitled to be a bit pissed off at moment!

[NotAllThere]

This needs a wider readership. So "bump".

[Scruff]

All strength to your bow!

Makes a fascinating and thoughtful read. You show great determination, courage and honesty in your post(s).

Thanks for posting this.

[NotAllThere]

All strength to your bowel!

FTFY


I thought of another one. Chill pils = cold beer.

[saptastic]

Thanks for posting @Lostit. Hopefully helps to share and hope it gets better from here.

[Lost It]

+1

no tongues!

wish you luck, we have 2 parents with cancer and it seems to be a very scary ride looking on, I have no idea how you cope with being in the hot seat.

I think I can honestly tell you that your two parents will be dealing with this far better than close relatives.

It's one of those things, you know you have a problem and your mind set is either "**** this I'm not letting this affect the way I am" or it's "I'm stuffed". The ones that think the first way, they have much more chance if I'm honest.

And the other thing I can tell you is that a lot of people don't know what to say to the people with cancer, or they stay away because they are embarrassed that they can't think of anything to say. It's sad when this happens, it's a big "thing" but all I will say is treat them as if they are the person you have always known, if they are having a bad day, tell them they must tell you. Be as curious as you like, if they don't want to tell you what it feels like, they won't, or they might find it helpful to discuss with you. Macmillan do a good job.

How did my cancer feel? well, first time around I was very anaemic, couldn't climb a set of stairs to the bedroom without getting breathless, and it wasn't from anticipation. 2nd time around, I was feeling great right up to the time I woke up after the operation. I've felt "unwell" since but I was chatting with wifey yesterday and she said she had no idea I could improve so much over just a few months, bear in mind when I went home I was an egg on legs with a "Mini me" stuck to my gut, now, well I have an operation scar that she still can't get used to and I'm seriously contemplating going back to work "in the field" again. I know I'll never be the person I was a year ago, but I can work on my limitations and try to limit the effect. Mainly stamina, but being careful what I eat, how much rest I get, pacing myself is the key. I still have my sense of fun, I still have a sense that until I hear different my plan to die in bed at 99 shot by a jealous husband is still "on".

My experience is that the more "visitors" you have, the ones that know you, which buttons to press, how to make you laugh, that kind of thing, the better it is for the ones with the cancer.

I can give you an example. I ride bikes, I have a few mates who also ride bikes, they have all been to see me through my convalescence and luckily we had a really good summer last year? 4 or them turned up at once, one Harley, one Ducati, two BHonda's, they were planning on taking me out on the back of one of them but I really wasn't up for it. Well, I was but my guts weren't if you get my drift..

So instead they all produced yellow stick it notes and started "claiming" stuff out of my bike shed for when I snuff it.
I was laughing my socks off, my lovely wife didn't think it was at all funny. But that memory still makes me smile. A good laugh when you are in a state can do wonders.

So talk to them, ask them how they are, how do they want you to deal with it. If it's terminal, well don't leave things unsaid. Life isn't a dress rehearsal, you aint coming back again (mind you I said that last time) and if at all possible, make sure you know what they want. Told my missus I want to be buried wearing the same thing I came into the world with. Under the shed so my bikes can drip oil onto me. Arse up so she can park her pushbike. But this is years away yet.

And my "carry in" music? Agadoo.

I still have a few things left to do. I want to see the northern lights, and I want to be a grandad.