Permanent Resource Impeding Pogress Permanent Resource Impeding Pogress
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  1. #1

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    Default Permanent Resource Impeding Pogress

    Greetings all - I'm a scrum master on a project with a certain governmental cartographic agency. We're approximately 75% through the development phase of this project and just as the deadlines start to get a bit aggressive we've had an inexperienced permanent developer foisted upon us. For the record, up until this point, the team has comprised 100% contractor resource.

    This isn't any typical PS role - we've worked hard for this & they are getting their money's worth so the subsequent dip in productivity that has occurred since this new team member was onboarded hasn't gone unnoticed by the business.

    I have taken this to the IT programme manager but it's fallen on deaf ears and there's really nowhere else I can go with this. The only way forward I can see is to try and divvy up all the real noddy jobs and give those to him - but even then, nothing we do is that simple given our application area.

    Was just wondering if anyone else has found themselves in this situation? Bottom line is, we need another permie on the team to call him out but since we don't have that it looks like the buck stops with us contractors through no fault of our own.

  2. #2

    Prof Cunning @ Oxford Uni

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    Hey pip, if you stuck to General instead of lying in Business, you might get away with it for longer.
    (Moving thread to General)
    I'm perfect, in a very specific and limited way.
    Hands... out infractions
    Face... the music
    Space... between the ears

  3. #3

    Nice But Dim

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    Quote Originally Posted by Marge On The Barge View Post
    Greetings all
    Feck off.
    Quote Originally Posted by Marge On The Barge View Post
    I'm a scrum master
    No you aren't, feck off.
    Quote Originally Posted by Marge On The Barge View Post
    on a project with a certain governmental cartographic agency.
    That would be The Hydrographic Office,given your prediliction for the South West of England, and no you aren't. Feck off
    Quote Originally Posted by Marge On The Barge View Post
    We're approximately 75% through the development phase of this project
    No you're not. Feck off.
    Quote Originally Posted by Marge On The Barge View Post
    and just as the deadlines start to get a bit aggressive we've had an inexperienced permanent developer foisted upon us.
    No you haven't. Feck off.
    Quote Originally Posted by Marge On The Barge View Post
    For the record, up until this point, the team has comprised 100% contractor resource.
    There s no team. Feck off.

    Quote Originally Posted by Marge On The Barge View Post
    This isn't any typical PS role -
    First true thing you've said. Typical PS roles actually exist. Feck off.
    Quote Originally Posted by Marge On The Barge View Post
    we've worked hard for this
    No you haven't. Feck off
    Quote Originally Posted by Marge On The Barge View Post
    & they are getting their money's worth
    Only becasue they aren't actually paying you anything. Feck off
    Quote Originally Posted by Marge On The Barge View Post
    so the subsequent dip in productivity
    Difficult when nothing was being produced to begin with. Feck off.
    Quote Originally Posted by Marge On The Barge View Post
    that has occurred since this new team member was onboarded hasn't gone unnoticed by the business.
    Yes it has, 'cos there is nothing for them to actually notice. Feck Off.

    Quote Originally Posted by Marge On The Barge View Post
    I have taken this to the IT programme manager
    No you haven't. Feck off.
    Quote Originally Posted by Marge On The Barge View Post
    but it's fallen on deaf ears
    You mean non-existant ears. Feck off
    Quote Originally Posted by Marge On The Barge View Post
    and there's really nowhere else I can go with this.
    How about Hell? Now feck off.
    Quote Originally Posted by Marge On The Barge View Post
    The only way forward I can see is to try and divvy up all the real noddy jobs and give those to him
    Difficult, when he doesn't even exist. Feck off
    Quote Originally Posted by Marge On The Barge View Post
    - but even then, nothing we do is that simple given our application area.
    Everything you do is simple, as it mostly involves posting bulltulip on here. Feck Off.

    Quote Originally Posted by Marge On The Barge View Post
    Was just wondering if anyone else has found themselves in this situation?
    No, because we actually have real gigs and don't post pointless bollocks on here instead of having a life. Feck off.
    Quote Originally Posted by Marge On The Barge View Post
    Bottom line is, we need another permie
    No you don't. Feck off.
    Quote Originally Posted by Marge On The Barge View Post
    on the team
    There is no team. Feck off.
    Quote Originally Posted by Marge On The Barge View Post
    to call him out
    he doesnt exist. Feck off.
    Quote Originally Posted by Marge On The Barge View Post
    but since we don't have that
    there is no 'we'. Feck off.
    Quote Originally Posted by Marge On The Barge View Post
    it looks like the buck stops with us contractors through no fault of our own.
    NONE OF THIS IS REAL. NOW FECK THE FECK OFF!
    "Being nice costs nothing and sometimes gets you extra bacon" - Pondlife.

  4. #4

    My post count is Majestic

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    Quote Originally Posted by DaveB View Post
    Feck off. No you aren't, feck off. That would be The Hydrographic Office,given your prediliction for the South West of England, and no you aren't. Feck off No you're not. Feck off. No you haven't. Feck off. There s no team. Feck off.

    First true thing you've said. Typical PS roles actually exist. Feck off. No you haven't. Feck off Only becasue they aren't actually paying you anything. Feck off Difficult when nothing was being produced to begin with. Feck off. Yes it has, 'cos there is nothing for them to actually notice. Feck Off.

    No you haven't. Feck off. You mean non-existant ears. Feck off How about Hell? Now feck off. Difficult, when he doesn't even exist. Feck off Everything you do is simple, as it mostly involves posting bulltulip on here. Feck Off.

    No, because we actually have real gigs and don't post pointless bollocks on here instead of having a life. Feck off. No you don't. Feck off. There is no team. Feck off. he doesnt exist. Feck off. there is no 'we'. Feck off. NONE OF THIS IS REAL. NOW FECK THE FECK OFF!
    What are you trying to say Dave?
    'CUK forum personality of 2011 - Winner - Yes really!!!!

  5. #5

    Prof Cunning @ Oxford Uni

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    Quote Originally Posted by northernladuk View Post
    What are you trying to say Dave?

    I don't know, HAL.
    I'm perfect, in a very specific and limited way.
    Hands... out infractions
    Face... the music
    Space... between the ears

  6. #6

    Super poster

    fullyautomatix 's job has never been outsourced

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    Poor Marge.
    Vote Corbyn ! Save this country !

  7. #7

    Some things in Moderation

    cojak is always on top

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    :
    "I can put any old tat in my sig, put quotes around it and attribute to someone of whom I've heard, to make it sound true."
    - Voltaire/Benjamin Franklin/Anne Frank...

  8. #8

    Double Godlike!

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    who owns all these sockies?????

  9. #9

    Prof Cunning @ Oxford Uni

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    Quote Originally Posted by original PM View Post
    who owns all these sockies

    No, Who owns a TARDIS.
    I'm perfect, in a very specific and limited way.
    Hands... out infractions
    Face... the music
    Space... between the ears

  10. #10

    More fingers than teeth

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    Quote Originally Posted by fullyautomatix View Post
    Poor Marge.
    Quote Originally Posted by DoctorStrangelove View Post
    Open the canal lock gates, HAL.

    Poor old barge.
    Shame. Up shіt creek without a paddle....


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