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Bad Sex Awards 2019

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    #31
    A woman chatted me up last night and asked if I'd like to have sex. I had to disappoint her, so we had sex.
    The greatest trick the devil ever pulled was convincing the world that he didn't exist

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      #32
      Originally posted by GJABS View Post
      Easy. I go round and shag your Mrs when you're away, then call you and tell you all about it
      (Hold the phone in your left hand)
      I thought you'd turned into a battyboy?
      Old Greg - In search of acceptance since Mar 2007. Hoping each leap will be his last.

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        #33
        In the actual bad sex awards(instead of fiction), I won the top 3 places. All with ex-mrs-bps....

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          #34
          Originally posted by Zigenare View Post
          I thought you'd turned into a battyboy?
          I have. But mb31's wife's got a beard and an Adam's apple, so doing her is easy
          (Joke!)

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            #35
            Originally posted by GJABS View Post
            I have. But mb31's wife's got a beard and an Adam's apple, so doing her is easy
            (Joke!)
            You owe me a new keyboard

            Comment


              #36
              Originally posted by BrilloPad View Post
              In the actual bad sex awards(instead of fiction), I won the top 3 places. All with ex-mrs-bps....
              All in the same 15 minutes according to her....
              The greatest trick the devil ever pulled was convincing the world that he didn't exist

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                #37
                Originally posted by LondonManc View Post
                All in the same 15 minutes according to her....
                They were different exs. And I need a 3 month recovery time these days....

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                  #38
                  GJABS this will be standard issue in my household Monday to Friday. Enter at your own risk.



                  ..chastity belt.. - Yelp
                  Last edited by mb31; 28 November 2019, 14:01.

                  Comment


                    #39
                    Originally posted by Zigenare View Post
                    I thought you'd turned into a battyboy?

                    You met Mrs MB? she makes Mrs Ass look attractive.
                    Always forgive your enemies; nothing annoys them so much.

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                      #40
                      Originally posted by GJABS View Post
                      I have. But mb31's wife's got a beard and an Adam's apple, so doing her is easy
                      (Joke!)
                      Lol

                      Are you hoping for a “hung” parliament ?


                      Sent from my iPhone using Contractor UK Forum

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