Friday Poetry Corner

[AlfredJPruffock]

Ladies and gentlemen, you have made most remarkable

Progress, and progress, I agree, is a boon;
You have built more automobiles than are parkable,


Crashed the sound-barrier, and may very soon
Be setting up cafes on the Moon:

But I beg to remind you that, despite all that,
I, Death, still am and will always be Cosmocrat.

Still I sport with the young and daring; at my whim,assign a nasty cough and fever

With others I wait until they are older
Before assigning, according to my humor,
To one a coronary, to one a tumor.

Liberal my views upon religion and race;
Tax-posture, credit-rating, social ambition
Cut no ice with me.

We shall meet face to face

Despite the drugs and lies of your physician,
The costly euphenisms of the mortician:
Glasgow Busker and London Banker

Both shall dance with me when I rattle my drum.”

WH Auden

[ladymuck]

Contagion
Elephants are contagious!
Be careful how you tread.
An Elephant that's been trodden on
Should be confined to bed!

Leopards are contagious too.
Be careful tiny tots.
They don't give you a temperature
But lots and lots - of spots.

The Herring is a lucky fish
From all disease inured.
Should he be ill when caught at sea;
Immediately - he's cured!

Spike Milligan

[Scruff]

If

If you can keep your head when all about you
Are losing theirs and blaming it on you...

[Mordac]

Alf, if you want to be liked, you need to give us funny poetry. All your doom and gloom stuff feels a bit to much like actual real life right now...

[AlfredJPruffock]

Alf, if you want to be liked, you need to give us funny poetry. All your doom and gloom stuff feels a bit to much like actual real life right now...

If we shadows have offended,
 Think but this, and all is mended—
 That you have but slumbered here
 While the Friday Poetry Corner did appear.
 And this weak and idle theme,
 No more yielding but a dream,
 
Sir Mordac do not reprehend.
 If you pardon, Pruffock will mend.
 And, as I am an honest Alf,
 If we have unearnèd luck
 Now to ’scape the serpent’s tongue,
 We will make amends ere long.
 Else the Alf a liar call.
 So good night unto you all.
 Give me your hands if we be friends,

[Scruff]

In days of old
When Knights were bold,
And paper was not invented.

They'd wipe their ass
With bits of grass,
Which left them freshly scented.

[Mordac]

If we shadows have offended,
 Think but this, and all is mended—
 That you have but slumbered here
 While the Friday Poetry Corner did appear.
 And this weak and idle theme,
 No more yielding but a dream,
 
Sir Mordac do not reprehend.
 If you pardon, Pruffock will mend.
 And, as I am an honest Alf,
 If we have unearnèd luck
 Now to ’scape the serpent’s tongue,
 We will make amends ere long.
 Else the Alf a liar call.
 So good night unto you all.
 Give me your hands if we be friends,

See, you can do funny.

[AlfredJPruffock]

See, you can do funny.

Aye Mordac !

My view is that There is always an element of fun - no matter the situation - I recall Frankie Boyles comments on pornhubs decision to give their Prime service at no cost to the citizens of Northen Italy - ".. now you know what the toilet paper was for. "


Pip Pip !!!

[sasguru]

Aye Mordac !

My view is that There is always an element of fun - no matter the situation - I recall Frankie Boyles comments on pornhunbs decision to give their Prime service to the citizens of Northen Italy - ".. know you know what the toilet paper was for. "


Pip Pip !!!

[NotAllThere]

Alf, if you want to be liked, you need to give us funny poetry. All your doom and gloom stuff feels a bit to much like actual real life right now...

I found it funny.

History repeats itself.
Has to.
No one listens.

S. Turner