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  1. #6681

    My post count is Majestic

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    Quote Originally Posted by BrilloPad View Post
    WTFH took his car to the garage for a new dipstick. It did not reach the oil anymore.

    I thought the mechanic was going to say - but there is one driving!!
    "If you didn't do anything that wasn't good for you it would be a very dull life. What are you gonna do? Everything that is pleasant in life is dangerous."

    I want to see the hand of history on his collar.

  2. #6682

    Prof Cunning @ Oxford Uni

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    Thought for today:
    Silence is golden
    Duck Tape is silver.
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  3. #6683

    Double Godlike!

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    Quote Originally Posted by WTFH View Post
    Thought for today:
    Silence is golden
    Duct Tape is silver.
    ftfy
    and it's gaffer tape, except to the septics.
    Entropy is NOT what it used to be.
    Inertia, however........................

  4. #6684

    Prof Cunning @ Oxford Uni

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    Quote Originally Posted by BR14 View Post
    ftfy
    and it's gaffer tape, except to the septics.
    I was being brand-specific...
    Duck Tape | Duct Tape and Packaging Tape
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  5. #6685

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    "Hey, here's my half-sister, Julie."
    "Half-sister? Different dad?"
    "No, shark attack."
    The greatest trick the devil ever pulled was convincing the world that he didn't exist

  6. #6686

    Prof Cunning @ Oxford Uni

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    A lion and a witch were carrying a wardrobe down the street..
    I said 'where are you going with that?'
    'Narnia business'
    How rude! I only asked
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  7. #6687

    Prof Cunning @ Oxford Uni

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    I've just found an origami porn channel in the hotel.



    But it's paper view only
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  8. #6688

    Prof Cunning @ Oxford Uni

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    I used to date an air stewardess from Helsinki.
    I dropped her off at work one day and she just vanished into Finnair…
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  9. #6689

    Prof Cunning @ Oxford Uni

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    A man died today when a pile of books fell on top of him.
    He only had his shelf to blame.
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  10. #6690

    Prof Cunning @ Oxford Uni

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    “I've just injected steroids into my arm"
    "Anabolic?"
    "No, just my arm"
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