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  1. Replies
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    Oh come on. That was only after the 9th pint*. ...

    Oh come on. That was only after the 9th pint*.


    * Of shandy.
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    I think mrnonuts is not using enough exclamation...

    I think mrnonuts is not using enough exclamation marks. Nor is he being sufficiently creative with fonts.

    I beginning to suspect he's a troll, rather than a loony. And we know how that ends up.
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    Oh. Do we have any of those?

    Oh. Do we have any of those?
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    250

    You can definitely blame Shapps for getting the...

    You can definitely blame Shapps for getting the date wrong. Risk is irrelevant to that argument.
  5. Replies
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    761

    It's not fair™. But is fair. What isn't fair, is...

    It's not fair™. But is fair. What isn't fair, is that not every child is able to have a decent education, Private schools with smaller classes and better teachers (as a result of being able to pay...
  6. Indeed. Might as well use an oven. Mmm. Green...

    Indeed. Might as well use an oven.

    Mmm. Green Eggs... but with Ham yes? Do you like it?

    https://static.tvtropes.org/pmwiki/pub/images/119334079_5.jpg
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    There is "genetic mutant freak". :D

    There is "genetic mutant freak". :D
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    Left-handedness is recessive. Both parents can be...

    Left-handedness is recessive. Both parents can be right-handed and the sprog be left. But even so - they're still genetic mutant freaks.

    My brother is ambisinistrous. Equally kack-handed with both...
  9. Replies
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    I've decided to use a different form of deodorant...

    I've decided to use a different form of deodorant each day of the week.
  10. Replies
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    OK - you do better. (You all mouth and no...

    OK - you do better. (You all mouth and no trousers soft southern tulip).
  11. Replies
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    Hah. You are a genetic mutant freak. Like two of...

    Hah. You are a genetic mutant freak. Like two of my kids.
  12. Coal? And you call yourself a man (or ape?). Real...

    Coal? And you call yourself a man (or ape?). Real men use wood. If the smoker isn't registering 350°C, it just isn't hot enough. You should get 2nd degree burns just looking at the bbq.

    Mine is...
  13. Replies
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    Nah. That's just you. :D With that, the only...

    Nah. That's just you. :D

    With that, the only way you'll be able to make it is if your people skills and sales skills are top notch. Clients want contractors to do something. You might be lucky,...
  14. Replies
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    I don't. Is there any evidence that the number of...

    I don't. Is there any evidence that the number of kids resorting to clearance has increased? Almost goes without saying.
  15. A negative covid-19 test is a good thing. It...

    A negative covid-19 test is a good thing. It means you probably don't currently have the disease. A positive covid-19 antibody test is a good thing - it's means you've had it and so probably have...
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    How To Make Zucchini Wine Step By Step - Misfit...

    How To Make Zucchini Wine Step By Step - Misfit Gardening
  17. Negative. :ohwell

    Negative. :ohwell
  18. Silly. Admin is a brexiter.

    Silly. Admin is a brexiter.
  19. This is correct. No. You don't put anything...

    This is correct.
    No. You don't put anything concerning VAT on the invoice.

    If you are not VAT registered in that country, you don't charge VAT to that country, and do not mention it on the...
  20. I had a covid-19 antibody test yesterday. I'm...

    I had a covid-19 antibody test yesterday. I'm feeling positive, but won't know for a few days whether I am.
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    Virtue signaller!

    Virtue signaller!
  22. Replies
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    206

    No one told the foreigners in the dinghies.

    No one told the foreigners in the dinghies.
  23. Replies
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    A fictional character? Tricky.

    A fictional character? Tricky.
  24. Replies
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    I'm hedging my bets. Currently 50/50.

    I'm hedging my bets. Currently 50/50.
  25. Replies
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    Dead naming. It's a real shame that some...

    Dead naming. It's a real shame that some individuals feel the need to blank out the part of their life before they decided they were a different gender.

    If someone misnames me, I just tell them...
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    Nice twist. 5G protects you against Covid nanites...

    Nice twist. 5G protects you against Covid nanites (is it a coincidence that nanite and nineteen sound the same? I think not.). That explains why the levels are so low in my town.
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    Not really. I thought is was good sci-fi because...

    Not really. I thought is was good sci-fi because the interpretation is far wider. But if you want to interpret as being solely about gender being an artificial construct go for it - which is still up...
  28. Replies
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    This is true. I just thought it was cool science...

    This is true. I just thought it was cool science fiction, questioning what we perceive as reality. Which is why I liked the 2nd and 3rd parts. And the additional material. It's such a brilliant idea....
  29. But the really stupid left in 2002.

    But the really stupid left in 2002.
  30. Replies
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    Leave my donkey alone, you pervert.

    Leave my donkey alone, you pervert.
  31. Replies
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    Israel reopened their schools, and there was a...

    Israel reopened their schools, and there was a big uptick in cases. The US is finding the same. However several European countries have not found any increase - Switzerland, Netherlands...
  32. VAT law is pretty uniform across Europe, and I...

    VAT law is pretty uniform across Europe, and I did work as a contractor in the UK for many years, handling my own VAT affairs. This question has been raising its head for decades, and really is no...
  33. If you sold these items to the company, then they...

    If you sold these items to the company, then they wouldn't be able to claim the VAT back. If they bought them on your behalf, they would.

    They must pay your bill as it stands. These are your...
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    Thick as pig-tulip is an antisemitic slur? So...

    Thick as pig-tulip is an antisemitic slur? So calling someone niggardly is racist?
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    My daughter was on a student workshop, and the...

    My daughter was on a student workshop, and the transwoman there was rather dismissive of her, because she isn't interested in "girly things", such as shopping, jewellery or makeup. It seems strange...
  36. You need one of these: Introducing the HPE Cray...

    You need one of these:
    Introducing the HPE Cray line of supercomputers
  37. Replies
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    https://pbs.twimg.com/media/EXL3IuPXYAs1be5.jpg

    https://pbs.twimg.com/media/EXL3IuPXYAs1be5.jpg
  38. Replies
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    Pah. Read and write from the stack directly, you...

    Pah. Read and write from the stack directly, you wuss.
  39. Replies
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    Read any director's opinion on the meaning of...

    Read any director's opinion on the meaning of their films and you'll find many examples.
  40. Replies
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    I prefer tensors.

    I prefer tensors.
  41. Replies
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    There are plenty of online calculators. Why not...

    There are plenty of online calculators. Why not try to find one?
  42. Replies
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    You missed out delusional.

    You missed out delusional.
  43. Replies
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    This one is the client, and is, in fact, a pretty...

    This one is the client, and is, in fact, a pretty good programmer.
  44. Replies
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    Good point, well presented.

    Good point, well presented.
  45. Oh dear. I've submitted expenses after year end....

    Oh dear. I've submitted expenses after year end. Company policies are made up. Debts owed are debts owed. Done it as permie and contractor. Mistakes happen. There are ways of dealing with it.
  46. Replies
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    Oh dear. I think you need eye tests.

    Oh dear. I think you need eye tests.
  47. Replies
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    Do you think you might possibly translate the...

    Do you think you might possibly translate the yank jokes into real English.

    Why can’t you hear a psychiatrist using the toilet?
    Because the ‘p’ is silent.

    What do you get when cross a donkey...
  48. Replies
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    I named a variable irule once. And, well, to cut...

    I named a variable irule once. And, well, to cut a long story short, I became a moderator of CUK to indulge my megalomania.
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    Yep. That one's from Sweden. And yes, you'll have...

    Yep. That one's from Sweden. And yes, you'll have fewer Eastern European gypsy gangs post brexit. But the local chaps will fill the gap.
  50. Sorry snowflake. Didn't mean to trigger you.

    Sorry snowflake. Didn't mean to trigger you.
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