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  1. Replies
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    Wife: I've badly injured my knee Me: Are Eenie,...

    Wife: I've badly injured my knee
    Me: Are Eenie, Meenie and Mo ok?
    Wife: I hate you.
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    https://sickcdn.azureedge.net/mainpic42018/42018.j...

    https://sickcdn.azureedge.net/mainpic42018/42018.jpg
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    https://sickcdn.azureedge.net/mainpic42014/42014.j...

    https://sickcdn.azureedge.net/mainpic42014/42014.jpg
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    https://sickcdn.azureedge.net/mainpic42006/42006.j...

    https://sickcdn.azureedge.net/mainpic42006/42006.jpeg
  5. Thread: PM: FAO Atw

    by vetran
    Replies
    4
    Views
    133

    FTFAtW

    FTFAtW
  6. Replies
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    (no) knickers

    (no) knickers
  7. Replies
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    Can

    Can
  8. Replies
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    Sticky: Yep enjoyed Hacksaw ridge, films like that do...

    Yep enjoyed Hacksaw ridge, films like that do restore my faith in humanity (because someone stands up for the right thing).
  9. Replies
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    Sockie

    Sockie
  10. Replies
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    Chop

    Chop
  11. Replies
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    Bollards

    Bollards
  12. There is a reason they are skint! MF

    There is a reason they are skint! MF
  13. Some kind of pervert not liking that mix!

    Some kind of pervert not liking that mix!
  14. Replies
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    Marxism

    Marxism
  15. Replies
    13
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    663

    You reckon Xoggy used to do that?

    You reckon Xoggy used to do that?
  16. no just give good tutorial!

    no just give good tutorial!
  17. Thread: Vaccine

    by vetran
    Replies
    15
    Views
    571

    oops I'm on CUK!

    oops I'm on CUK!
  18. Thread: Vaccine

    by vetran
    Replies
    15
    Views
    571

    only for men with odd shaped balls

    only for men with odd shaped balls
  19. Replies
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    412

    Asking for a friend?

    Asking for a friend?
  20. Replies
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    810

    FTFY

    FTFY
  21. Replies
    12
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    329

    No I am all for facts not glib statements. You...

    No I am all for facts not glib statements. You suggested it was a single male when in fact many people seem to be involved in the expert opinion of the police.

    So on the cops accused of having a...
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    https://sickcdn.azureedge.net/mainpic41948/41948.j...

    https://sickcdn.azureedge.net/mainpic41948/41948.jpeg
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    For CovBob

    https://sickcdn.azureedge.net/mainpic41951/41951.jpeg
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    They arrested both parents and a number of...

    They arrested both parents and a number of relatives so no it wasn't just a single male. People willing to kill for offence to their sky fairies are just incompatible with modern civilisation.
  25. Replies
    8
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    210

    SueEllen in drag with a nut fetish? No I'm not...

    SueEllen in drag with a nut fetish?

    No I'm not keen dumping our crap on India/Malaysia etc rather than doing a proper job recycling. Have you not seen the kids burning wire and smashing up TVs on...
  26. Replies
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    329

    yeah some of them.

    yeah some of them.
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    Sticky: congrats just think only another 21 years till I...

    congrats just think only another 21 years till I can retire.
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    And finally the councils have been caught sending...

    And finally the councils have been caught sending all the tulip to India etc. claiming it is being recycled and taking the brown envelopes.
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    Sticky: Watched 1917 last night it was a pretty good...

    Watched 1917 last night it was a pretty good movie. Plot a little lost sometimes and the Germans were portrayed as fairly bloodthirsty and desperate not really nice guys with a poor choice in a...
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    Sticky: https://upload.wikimedia.org/wikipedia/commons/thu...

    https://upload.wikimedia.org/wikipedia/commons/thumb/2/2a/SL_postcode_area_map.svg/1024px-SL_postcode_area_map.svg.png
  31. Thread: Losers

    by vetran
    Replies
    5
    Views
    206

    Germany's sheep would be afraid?

    Germany's sheep would be afraid?
  32. Replies
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    https://sickcdn.azureedge.net/mainpic41888/41888.j...

    https://sickcdn.azureedge.net/mainpic41888/41888.jpg
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    https://sickcdn.azureedge.net/mainpic41930/41930.j...

    https://sickcdn.azureedge.net/mainpic41930/41930.jpg
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    now I know where to bury my nuts!

    now I know where to bury my nuts!
  35. Replies
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    “OK darling, you all set ?” He whispered...

    “OK darling, you all set ?” He whispered seductively
    ‘Yes”, she replied huskily
    “Have you thought of a safe word ?”
    “Meatloaf” she answered.”
    “Meatloaf ?” He queried .
    “But of course” she said,...
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    My dream job would be answering the phone on the...

    My dream job would be answering the phone on the suppository helpline. Imagine that. Every time someone phones up, you tell them to shove it up their arse!
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    Only if she is blonde, American and gives good...

    Only if she is blonde, American and gives good tutorial.
  38. Replies
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    Sticky: try the SL postcode I don't live in a trumphole!...

    try the SL postcode I don't live in a trumphole! Neither does Liz.
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    Sticky: You need to stop hanging out in the spoons. ...

    You need to stop hanging out in the spoons.

    There actually some nice restaurants in the villages and Windsor/Eaton/Maidenhead/Marlowe/Ascot.
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    Sticky: Parts of "Slough" can be nice, give me a shout if...

    Parts of "Slough" can be nice, give me a shout if you get there, I will give you the tour.

    I live near Slough.

    well done with the interview.
  41. Thread: No kissing NAT!

    by vetran
    Replies
    6
    Views
    214

    Methinks the yodeller doth protest too much.

    Methinks the yodeller doth protest too much.
  42. Not screwdrivers but battery tools LIDL/ALDI have...

    Not screwdrivers but battery tools LIDL/ALDI have a great range. Electric Drill, SDS drill, Bench Sander, Bench Grinder Multitool, Planer etc.

    Already had 2 compressors (long story) but they do a...
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    663

    This is Xoggy our resident macabre, he used to...

    This is Xoggy our resident macabre, he used to leave them under the floorboards.:igmc:
  44. Thread: No kissing NAT!

    by vetran
    Replies
    6
    Views
    214

    No kissing NAT!

    Yodelling 'superspreader' concert is blamed for turning Swiss region into a covid hotspot | Daily Mail Online




    oi NAT what have you been up to?
  45. Replies
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    I went into the library and asked for a book on...

    I went into the library and asked for a book on the history of spinsters.


    "It's been left on the shelf" said the librarian.
  46. Replies
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    When my great-grandad went bald, he built a...

    When my great-grandad went bald, he built a machine to weave himself a wig out of yarn


    He then gave it to my grandad, who then gave it to my dad - and one day, it will be mine.


    It’s our...
  47. Replies
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    I tried to come up with a joke about tulip...

    I tried to come up with a joke about tulip furniture but I've got no Ikea.
  48. Replies
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    Douglas Adams once famously wrote that the answer...

    Douglas Adams once famously wrote that the answer to life, the universe and everything is '42'.


    Well, he got that wrong.


    I'm 43 now, and I still know ****-all about anything.
  49. Replies
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    I hate being married to a cockney. Every...

    I hate being married to a cockney.


    Every time I write apples and pears on the shopping list, she comes home with a staircase.
  50. This one is better

    https://i.dailymail.co.uk/1s/2020/10/16/01/34455074-8845937-image-m-27_1602808626236.jpg
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