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Type: Posts; User: northernladyuk

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  1. Replies
    113
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    4,332

    If you want him burrowing up into you, you're...

    If you want him burrowing up into you, you're more than welcome.
  2. Replies
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    473

    It masks the old man's odour of the floor of the...

    It masks the old man's odour of the floor of the gents' end cubicle at Wigan Wallgate.
  3. Replies
    35
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    1,622

    The old man has that written on the back of his...

    The old man has that written on the back of his elephant thong. But then he has been known to get ****ed 8 ways for one contract.
  4. Replies
    9
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    796

    Not so much when you're wearing your air hostess...

    Not so much when you're wearing your air hostess uniform.
  5. Replies
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    1,356

    First time he has done this.

    First time he has done this.
  6. Replies
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    2,819

    Wise words The old man had three interviews once...

    Wise words The old man had three interviews once and he couldn't walk or tulip straight for a fortnight.
  7. Replies
    16
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    616

    Poll: FTFY

    FTFY
  8. Replies
    71,196
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    5,440,893

    Throat

    Throat
  9. Replies
    22
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    1,444

    There's a reason why people ask you simple...

    There's a reason why people ask you simple questions.
  10. Replies
    1
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    150

    Flap insurance - worth getting?

    The old man is off to Morocco for the final stage of his gender assignment surgery. If there are complications, I'm going to have the expense of hiring in a sub for the Wigan Wallgate patch. Is it...
  11. I take 7 quid and the other 3 goes directly into...

    I take 7 quid and the other 3 goes directly into repaying his hardship loan. But I keep it quiet to maintain my reputation, so hush hush please.
  12. Replies
    27
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    1,007

    You'll get the child support demand through the...

    You'll get the child support demand through the post.
  13. Replies
    27
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    1,007

    Are you offering?

    Are you offering?
  14. Replies
    27
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    1,007

    You are descended from a long line of Wigan...

    You are descended from a long line of Wigan toilet traders.

    That will be £500.
  15. Replies
    57
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    2,648

    From whose perspective? That was minimal effort.

    From whose perspective? That was minimal effort.
  16. Replies
    57
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    2,648

    They're not your parents, and they're not your...

    They're not your parents, and they're not your kids.
  17. They fit snugly in concrete boots.

    They fit snugly in concrete boots.
  18. Replies
    15
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    650

    What if it's DVDA?

    What if it's DVDA?
  19. Replies
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    458

    The old man charges a tenner supplement for vom...

    The old man charges a tenner supplement for vom sports.
  20. A nice change from your usual end cubicle at...

    A nice change from your usual end cubicle at Wigan Wallgate gents.
  21. Replies
    42
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    1,774

    No he's shouldn't.

    No he's shouldn't.
  22. Replies
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    443

    We all know where he likes a long extension.

    We all know where he likes a long extension.
  23. Replies
    32
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    2,500

    The old man put Porkies on his CV, but the agent...

    The old man put Porkies on his CV, but the agent checked out his My Space profile and saw that it was the pigporn version, so no dice.
  24. The old man went to his last year's Comic Relief...

    The old man went to his last year's Comic Relief fancy dress at work day, wearing nothing but his thong. They were just calling Security, when he explained he was dressed as a premature ejaculation,...
  25. Replies
    36
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    1,740

    When did you start to suspect?

    When did you start to suspect?
  26. Replies
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    446

    These kinds of situation are complex and it's...

    These kinds of situation are complex and it's difficult to advise without understanding more detail - you've left it very vague. But as a warning tale, the old man was doing a desktop support gig at...
  27. Replies
    2
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    229

    I'll beaver you.

    I'll beaver you.
  28. Replies
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    1,907

    The old man went to A&E and had a very...

    The old man went to A&E and had a very embarrassing examination of the injuries, after working with a particularly well endowed Brazilian sailor
  29. Replies
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    1,672

    Makes a change from the French maid outfit.

    Makes a change from the French maid outfit.
  30. Replies
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    10,517

    And your mum's career choices are legally...

    And your mum's career choices are legally borderline to say the least.
  31. Replies
    2
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    304

    Is that a euphemism?

    Is that a euphemism?
  32. Replies
    4
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    354

    You called?

    You called?
  33. Replies
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    3,182

    I'd be happy if you'd stop bleeding in the shower.

    I'd be happy if you'd stop bleeding in the shower.
  34. Replies
    26
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    1,440

    Twice.

    Twice.
  35. Replies
    31
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    1,366

    I'm stocking Asda Smart Price dog food to keep...

    I'm stocking Asda Smart Price dog food to keep the old man going while he's servicing European lorry drivers for hard currency.
  36. Replies
    36
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    2,355

    The old man's shock collar remote control.

    The old man's shock collar remote control.
  37. That would be a first.

    That would be a first.
  38. Replies
    8
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    573

    Whatever.

    Whatever.
  39. Better than the alternative.

    Better than the alternative.
  40. Thread: If...

    by northernladyuk
    Replies
    12
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    987

    And—which is more—you'll be a Man, my son!

    And—which is more—you'll be a Man, my son!
  41. Replies
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    Any Mingers on here?

    I know this is in general, so I expect the usual p-taking, but just wondering if there are any Mingers on here. Excellent way to get laid if you're a little chubby (and I expect many on here are) is...
  42. Thread: If...

    by northernladyuk
    Replies
    12
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    987

    Make sure vibrate mode is on.

    Make sure vibrate mode is on.
  43. Replies
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    588

    Merry Christmas one and all! The old man is...

    Merry Christmas one and all!

    The old man is nipping down to the garage for some festive business, so it will be barley sugars, travel blanket and two litres of Castrol GTX for Christmas again.
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    Ask your f***ing accountant.

    Ask your f***ing accountant.
  45. Replies
    112
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    5,745

    It's been parody, so protected.

    It's been parody, so protected.
  46. Replies
    112
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    5,745

    https://pbs.twimg.com/media/Du4yKcnX4AAmWcd.jpg

    https://pbs.twimg.com/media/Du4yKcnX4AAmWcd.jpg
  47. Replies
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    2,602

    There's a Turkish chemical tanker docking tonight...

    There's a Turkish chemical tanker docking tonight so plenty more work for you before year end.
  48. View Post

    <mod snip>
  49. Replies
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    532

    They banned him for lowering the tone.

    They banned him for lowering the tone.
  50. I'll get the old man to give it a wipe down...

    I'll get the old man to give it a wipe down before your turn.
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